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  • My grandparents filled my heart with love.

    Dear Grandma Urdang and Grandpa Urdang,
    Growing up Mom and Dad took me almost every weekend to visit you in Greenich Village. We either drove into the city or in later years came down the palisade parkway to visit you on the very cool west 4 th street in the west village. You lived in a 100 year old nyc city historic landmark apartment building on the 3rd floor without an elevator. Your apartment was far from fancy or nicely decorated. It was dark and a bit dreary but I had the absolutely best time coming to see you and Grandpa. When I was very little you both would kiss my hands and face and call me shana maidela (which is Yiddish for pretty girl). You made me feel so beautiful.
    Homemade chicken soup was always the meal we shared. Yum. delicious. When I was 14 my parents told me I could take the bus from Rockland County to the 42nd street bus terminal by myself to come visit you. I loved those times I had you all to myself. Unfortunately, in later years it was just you grandma. I think at that point you were starting to face your mortality so you decided to give me money every time I came to visit. Now I want you to know that kind gesture that you insisted on giving me touched me but that was nothing compared to the affection and love I received from you. I felt like I was your favorite grandchild. Maybe all your grandchildren felt that way. It did not matter. I so cherished the loving bond we had. I hope I gave you as much joy as you gave me and I hope I always made you proud. I know the life I have lived and the love I am able to give my family is a direct result of the sweetness you surrounded me with throughout my childhood. I so miss you both.
    Your shana maidela,
    Shelala

    Shelley Brill

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    • Shelley

      This is a sweet story. I’m glad you got so much love from your grandparents. Chicken soup never sounded so good before. I can picture you having chicken soup with your grandparents on a cold day in NYC. Your letter makes me miss my grandparents. I remember my grandad getting me a candy bar and giving it to me. I miss going to my…read more

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  • My Favorite Childhood Memories

    Dear Mom and Dad,

    When I was a child, we went on trips to Disney World, Aruba, California, and Vermont. We went to zoos and parks and all sorts of places. I played soccer worldwide, as we traveled as far as Italy to compete. While each of those memories is special, one of my favorite memories growing up is a bit simpler.

    Every day from first grade until my senior year, one of you drove me to school – sometimes a half hour away. I played soccer for teams all over the state, and you drove me to practice and games several times a week. In addition, you also took me to girl scouts, Hebrew school, tennis lessons, dance, acting classes, and who knows what else. With all these activities, it was often just one of you in the car and me. If it were dad and me, we’d often talk about soccer or school. Dad, you’d pump me up and build my confidence. It was in those car rides you told me I could do anything I wanted in life.

    Mom, if I were in the car with you, we’d blast music like NSYNC and the Backstreet Boys and talk about life. On one of those car rides, while cruising down the New York State Thruway, we decided the song “This is My Promise to You” by NSYNC would be OUR song.

    Those car rides are some of my most cherished memories from my childhood. It was moments I had your full attention – while me and the road, of course. I could talk to you about anything, and we weren’t distracted by other people or the noise of the rest of the world. It was just us. The attention made me feel loved and important. In those car rides, I found a safe space to share my fears and doubts and tell you about whatever was on my mind. Dad told me stories that included life lessons, while mom always was positive and reassuring.

    It was in those car rides I learned to believe in myself.

    While sometimes, we as human beings try to create great memories – planning big trips or throwing huge parties – for me, the best memories have always been the ones we didn’t even realize we were creating.

    I Love you both.

    P.S. I owe you some gas money

    Lauren

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    • Lauren,

      Y’all had a lot of fun trips together. Disneyworld is still on my list of places I want to visit. I’m glad you had those car rides with your mom and dad. You have amazing parents that give you love every chance they get and that is awesome!

      Car rides are so much fun. I enjoy the car rides I had with my family when we would go to…read more

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  • A simple compliment can go a long way

    When I first started my career as a pharmaceutical sales rep i was not very confident. I had just finished my masters in psychological counseling. But at the completion of that degree I decided to take a different route. Mu first position in pharmaceuticals was with Mead Johnson. You were my very first manager. As a pharmaceutical sales person it is required to do a ride along once a month with your manager. Your manager then observes everything you do during the day. Boy was I nervous but you Mr. Rosone calmed my fears.
    In addition, you would explaining best practices to me and encourage me to initiate more dialogue with the physicians. This terrified me but if I was ever to get better at my job I had to be more conversational with my accounts. One day you and I were in a doctor’s office. You asked the doctor his experience with one of my company’s drugs. The physician gave us feedback. You looked at me as to say you need to respond and give a thoughtful very comment. Well thru my nerves I started to rattle off a great response to the doctor’s objections. I felt like I did ok. When you and I got out to the car you told me my words were perfect. You told me I was very prepared and sounded very knowledgeable. You told me I could have a very successful career in this industry.
    That compliment and encouragement changed the trajectory of my professional career. Because I never thought I would succeed at anything except psychological counseling. Your support has echoed in my ear throughout my career. I always wanted to live up to your high expectations and prove you right. As a result I worked very hard throughout my professional life to be the shining star you thought I could be. I hope I have made you proud.

    Shelley

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  • To my ninth-grade guidance counselor at Suffern High School

    To my ninth-grade guidance counselor,

    We met when I was 13 years old, a young freshman at Suffern High School. You were assigned to be my guidance counselor because my last name started with a “B.” The truth is, I don’t remember much about our interactions. Embarrassingly, I am not even sure of your name (I think your last name started with the letter “B”). However, there is one instance I do remember, and I want you to know why it has echoed in my brain for the last two decades.

    In my first year of high school, English was the only subject I did not get selected for the honors class. Ambitious and competitive, I thought getting an “A” in the standard English class would secure me a spot in the honors class my sophomore year. But unfortunately, once again, I was not recommended. Disappointed, I came to you and filed paperwork to petition my teacher’s decision. A few weeks later, you informed me that the school decided to allow me to take honors English. And you were the main reason why.

    You explained that usually when a teacher does not recommend a student for an honors class, you do not place them there. You always wanted to ensure students were in environments where they could succeed. However, you felt I was different. You told me you wrote a strong recommendation, explaining that I was a special student. You said I was the type of person that thrives on challenges, and you believed if the school gave me a challenge, I would not only meet it, but also surpass all expectations.

    I had zero clue what I did or said to give you that impression. But I didn’t question you. I took that compliment and ran with it. In my sophomore year, I worked my butt off in English class, asking my teacher many questions, spending extra time on papers, and (for the first time in my life) completing all the reading assignments. I didn’t want to let you down. I wanted to prove that you were right. Sure enough, I received an “A” in honors English that year.

    However, your compliment stayed with me long after the school year ended. For the last two decades, every time I have faced a challenge in school or my career, your words have echoed in my head. When I got into an Ivy League college and was unsure if I was smart enough to go, I thought of what you said about me. When I got a job as a television anchor, with little to no anchoring experience, I thought about your faith in me. When I decided to start a business with no real seed money, I once again heard your words reverberate inside my head.

    That one compliment has added fuel to my fearless personality, as I have pursued all of my dreams. And ironically, since that sophomore-year English class, writing has been the foundation for most of my achievements.

    After college, I became the youngest and only female writer for NBA.com. For ten years, I worked as a television sportscaster, receiving seven Emmy nominations and an AP Sports Award for my ability to write and tell a story. Three years ago, I started my own company called The Unsealed. We are a platform where we help people write and share open letters that empower, inspire and encourage equality. From People to ESPN to TMZ, nearly every major news outlet in the country has picked up one of our stories. We are nearing a million hits worldwide. More importantly, we’ve helped countless people in myriad ways.

    Twenty-two years ago, you told my naysayers you believed I would surpass their expectations in English class that year. However, because of you and that one compliment, I have and will continue to exceed my own expectations in life.

    While I may not remember your name, I will forever remember your impact.

    Thank you,

    Lauren Brill

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  • Lauren Brill shared a letter in the Group logo of PoetryPoetry group 1 years, 7 months ago

    Mirror Mirror

    Every day I look in the mirror but rarely do I see my reflection
    Instead I just see the reason I often garner men’s affection

    In the mirror I can see the scar on my face but I miss the imperfections in my actions
    Instead I just see big brown eyes, long brown hair and stare with satisfaction

    In the mirror I look myself in the eye but never do I own up to the hurt I have inflicted
    Instead the mirror lets me exist however I would like to be depicted

    A mirror is hard…but yet its never been tough on me at all
    Instead it’s always let my ugliness fall

    The mirrors that line my walls do not point out my flaws or my beauty
    Only a friend who takes the time to look inside can do that duty

    Every day, usually after I look in the mirror, I do see my reflection
    Through my friends and family who have my attention

    I now know I can’t see what I look like in a mirror because that’s not real
    To see what you look like you must ask those around you how you make them feel

    Lauren

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  • This is why I don't give up

    @writerjordanohalloran @oneturbobenz @algonzalez @jordanwalker @jordynjacobson @ciarapray @emdissocool @lulli101 @elizalila123 @dburtz @janetbanks @janettesegura @japarker1962

    To The Unsealed Community ,

    I usually say my childhood dream was to be a sportscaster, and while that’s true, it was only part of the dream. The vision, the goal, has always been much bigger.

    Since I was a little- four or five years old, I would tell my parents, “One day, I am going to change the world.”

    It’s cheesy and cliche, I know. But it’s also true. I had so much ambition. At eight years old, I would stay up all night worrying and thinking about my career.

    When I would tell my mom, she would respond, “What career? You’re eight!”

    She totally didn’t get it, and both my parents did what they could to try and convince me to take some pressure off myself, which I never did.

    I have no idea where this desire to succeed on a monumental scale came from, but it’s always been there for as long as I can remember. The drive. The hunger. The desire. And, unfortunately, the constant worrying about how or if I could make this happen.

    While I have checked off a few boxes regarding my goals, including attending an ivy league college and becoming a sportscaster, there is still so much more I want to do. And I certainly thought by my 30’s, I’d have this whole changing-the-world career path all figured out. While I have made progress, I am still trying to piece it all together.

    In pursuit of my goal, I started The Unsealed, a platform for people to share their truth in the form of open letters. Through these letters, I hope to amplify voices and inspire people around the globe but I have made so many mistakes. Every day, I am still learning about entrepreneurship, marketing, and online communities.

    Every second I am scared. I’m afraid I won’t figure this out. I am scared I will make a wrong decision, making what feels like this Jinga tower I am building come crashing down. I know that applying for a job with a designated set of tasks, “normal” hours, and a consistent paycheck would be much easier. But that’s not my dream.

    So,I keep pushing and do my best to lean away from my fears and into my confidence. And with each challenge that arises (and there are many), I draw motivation from several different places.

    Many of you have shared with me that The Unsealed has changed your life. It’s made some of you feel seen. It’s made some of you feel heard. It’s influenced at least one of you not to take your own life. On the days I am tired, and in the moments I am scared, I think of all of you.

    Then, there are my parents. They have poured their time, their heart, their soul, and their money into my dream and my happiness without ever asking me for so much as a penny in return. They read all of our stories. They come to every single zoom. They share all of my posts. My mom has spent hours helping me email schools and writing programs. I so desperately want my parents to see my company take over the world because I know their wishes are for mine to come true. On the days I am tired, and in the moments I am scared, I think of my parents.

    Lastly, I have worked so hard. I have sacrificed relationships, time with my friends, the opportunity to make more money faster, and who knows what else to pursue this crazy dream. I want this. I work every day – seven days a week, often typing away until I fall asleep fully dressed with my computer by my side. I love what I do. I love my mission. I love what we have already accomplished and what I hope my company will one day achieve. I owe it to myself to keep going – to not give up on the days I am tired, and in the moments I am scared.

    Dreams don’t come true quickly or easily for most people. And that’s why for most people, their dreams will always be just a dream. But every day, I am glad that I haven’t given up on you, my parents, or myself because even if I don’t change the whole damn world, my work, my heart, my passion, and my resilience is already changing many lives, including mine.

    Thanks for being here on this scary but beautiful journey. This is just the beginning.

    With love, hope, and faith,

    Lauren

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    • This is wonderful. Even at a young age you “got that dawg in you” and you never gave up because you subconsciously knew your potential before it became a reality. Thank you for sharing

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  • To my best friend, Tonia...

    Dear Tonia,

    At 14 years old, I played soccer for a premier travel team. Most of my teammates played on my age group’s Olympics Development Program team. However, I didn’t play ODP because I wanted to play lacrosse with my school friends in the spring. Thanks, in part, to that decision, the travel coach, who ran both teams, cut me. I was crushed – kicking the dashboard in the car when I found out. It was complete bullshit. But little did I know at that moment that getting cut would lead me to one of the greatest blessings of my life.

    Shortly after, I found another club team with plenty of college-bound players – most a few years older than me. The team was Monroe Magic. Your dad was the coach. I don’t remember that first practice. So, truth be told, I don’t know exactly when we met. But I know it wasn’t long before we became close friends. We bonded over the fact that we were, by far, the most feminine girls on the team. We loved getting our makeup and hair done and were completely boy crazy.

    Our teammates would tease us when we’d get dressed up to go to dinner by saying things like, “You two going to prom?”

    And I know you remember when someone ratted us out and told your dad that we were in the hotel room of some boys we met at a tournament. When your dad came knocking, we hid in the bathtub. I have never been so silent in my entire life, and we got so lucky that he didn’t pull back and check behind the shower curtain.

    Throughout high school, we spent nearly every weekend together: clubs in the city, parties all over the place (including in our cars), and lots and lots of boys. We weren’t competitive with each other. We didn’t gossip behind each other’s backs. We never lied to each other. As teenagers, we had an honest and genuine friendship.

    That remained true as the years went by. We’ve supported and comforted each other through breakups, losing loved ones, and unexpected trauma. And we’ve continued to show we care about each other in various ways.

    When we both lived in New York, you’d come over with clothes and say, “Hey, I saw this in a store and thought it would look great on you, so I bought it. Here you go.”

    Seriously, who does that?

    To this day, you have never missed a birthday. And you’re still my favorite dance partner.

    Now, in our 30’s, we rarely see each other. I feel like we barely even talk. You live in South Carolina with your beautiful little family as you build a business. And I live in Miami, where I am working on growing my company. Even so, whenever we need each other, we always show up for each other. And when we are together, we always have fun.

    Twenty years later, I couldn’t be more grateful that I got cut from that BS team because getting cut led me to you. And when I think about the impact you have had on my life, I think of how you have always made me feel, and that is happy. Our friendship is pure joy and happiness.

    I have no clue at what point I decided that you were my best friend for life, but you’re stuck with me now.

    I love you.

    Lauren

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  • We All Need a Cheerleader

    Dear Lauren,
    Ever since you were a small child you were always extremely chatty. I was lucky to be the recipient of your words of wisdom. When you were a teenager I was working in New York City working with some really amazing physicians. I was intimidated by these colleagues that I actually had to teach. I had to give them very detailed information about very strong drugs that were actually controlled substances. I was challenged and questioned a lot by these doctors. I came home worried that I was an inadequate source of information for these thought leaders.
    Well those evenings when I came home feeling less worthy of my position, I would tell you how I felt. You were always so supportive and complimentary. Every night you would tell me I was much smarter then I thought and yes you always told me how beautiful I was. You were so insistent that I accept the fact that I was very smart. Growing up I struggled in elementary school. I reversed my letters, had trouble in math and had terrible handwriting. My report card usually had C’s. Nothing to be proud of compared to my 2 very gifted children and my attorney husband. I would tell you all this quite often at night and you would not hear it. That was in the past. You told me I gave really good advice, that I was articulate, a good listener, and was much smarter then I gave myself credit for.
    Lauren, I think I have finally found the confidence in myself that you saw in me all along. We all need a cheerleader in our life and you have been mine. I am so lucky to have you and Andrew and Dad in my life to raise me up. So I really always had 3 cheerleaders, but you my dear, with your outgoing personality, had the loudest megaphone. Your positive words are always there in my head swirling around telling me “Mom you can do it” Thank you my dear beautiful daughter Lauren.

    Mom

    Shelley Brill

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    • aww mommy! I love you! And I told you that you were smart because YOU ARE!! You just needed to believe in yourself. I love watching you grow and seeing you venture out of your comfort zone. It’s cool to see you start to believe and see your own brilliance. I love you and will never stop telling you how smart and beautiful you are (inside and out).

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      • Dear Lauren,
        I miss and love you too! I will try to make you proud of me. I am always proud of you and all you do with The Unsealed as well as helping other people in need. You are a bright star in my world and you light up this world with your beautiful writing talent. Continue to spread your positivity.
        Love,
        Mom

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        • A multi-generational family of scribblers! Hurrah!

          Contemplating M and Y

          Insignificant alone, joined together,
          M and Y form a bond that is hard to pry apart.
          My child moves me to the core.
          Deeply felt, it draws upon instincts
          passed down from ancient ancestors,
          fossil remnants suggesting a common bond.

          My child transforms into its own…read more

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    • Beautiful, I love it, and it makes me think of my life cheerleader, my daughter. I came from a family of a mother/father, siblings, yet none who ever went to college, some who didn’t even complete high school. So what made me think I would. Our parents never, ever spoke with us about going to college, because they didn’t go. My mother became…read more

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  • To the Woman Who Gave Me a Professional Purpose

    Dear Margaret Sanger,
    Many years ago I was hired as a pharmaceutical representative to sell birth control. At the time, I did not give much thought as to how fortunate women are when it comes to deciding when they will birth a baby. But at some point I got curious. When did contraception become available to women in this country? To my surprise, I learned that up until the 1900’s any mention or dissemination of literature or actual birth control options was illegal. So what did I do? Well of course first I googled, which lead me to read the very interesting biography of the amazing advocate for the reproductive freedom movement, Margaret Sanger.
    Margaret, you were so brave to publish the first articles on women’s sexuality in a very candid way. You stirred up a-lot of controversy but at the same time many women also supported your writings. You worked as a visiting nurse in NYC and met women who were performing dangerous life threatening abortions on themselves out of desperation. When one very desperate woman, who already had many children, asked her doctor if there was anything she could to prevent pregnancy he just suggested abstinence. These types of insensitive and unrealistic attitudes motivated you to begin educating women in a public forum about birth control. For this, you were arrested. You were forced to flee the country and live abroad until the American society was ready to be enlightened on this subject. You were so passionate and dedicated to the well being of women.
    Margaret, many people do not know you were the founder of Planned Parenthood, an organization that has treated thousands of women, offering a wide array of gynecological services at a very affordable level. You impacted my life because you inspired me and impassioned me to be a voice for those who cannot advocate for themselves. Reading about your challenging journey to provide women with reproductive freedom, I became a better sales representative. You put my heart into every word I expressed to my customers. Those doctors I spoke to went on to provide more viable, safe birth control choices for their patients. You gave me a purpose to my career and a great pride in my work. Thank you, my hero, Margaret Sanger, a liberator for all women.

    Shelley Brill
    Mother of 2 amazing children Lauren and Andrew Brill

    Shelley Brill

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    • Hi Roger,
      It so comforting to know there are other people out there who understand the importance of reproductive freedom and reproductive choice. This freedom adds to the health and safety of women. I do hope more people in this country start to see that there are many life threatening gynecological situations that require medical…read more

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  • One Teacher Can Make All the Difference

    Dear Mrs.Shumsky,
    When I entered your 4th grade class way back in the fall of 1960 I was the most quiet, shy and insecure little girl. So shy, I never spoke to any adults ever except my parents and grandparents.My teachers leading up to 4th grade were cold and distant and probably did not like me because I was a weak student with very sloppy handwriting. I probably required more attention then other students and that meant more work for prior teachers. But you, Mrs. Shumsky, saw something sweet and vulnerable in me. I think you saw some actual potential because while other children were reading at their desk, you brought me to your desk and quietly tutored me. You helped me write my cursive letters correctly. You helped me improve in math. All this attention made me feel special and hopeful that I could succeed in school. The piece de resistance was being handed the lead role in our class play. I was to be a weeping willow for Arbor Day. This simple gesture made me incredibly happy and gave me the most valuable gift, a hint of confidence. I still had a long way to go but Mrs.Shumsky, you put me on the right road to a more fulfilling, “step out of your comfort zone”, life. Thank you my dear sweet teacher.

    Shelley Ann Kalstein
    Memories from 1960
    P.S.165
    Kew Gardens, NYC

    Shelley Brill

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    • It only takes one. One to make you feel like you truly matter, to get you started to being who or what you want to be. That teacher was a wonderful person to choose you to be the special one and it made you feel that way. You needed that; and when you received a role in that school play, that just earned you a little more confident. She was a huge…read more

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    • This is amazing. Mrs. Schumsky sure is a wonderful person and was a wonderful teacher and motivator for you. She did what no other teacher would do. Nurture you and give you a chance to succeed and become a better person and get you out of your comfort zone. Thank you for sharing

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  • To the professor who changed my life

    Dear Professor Abzug,

    When I walked into your Women and Leadership class at Columbia University in the fall of 2006, I expected to learn about women’s history, engage in interesting conversations, and write about famous leaders. But as it turns out, you and your class left me with so much more than I could have ever anticipated.

    Before your class, my world was very small. I was a 20-year-old college student, consumed with school, my family, a new boyfriend, and the latest party. I didn’t spend much time thinking about the world beyond my bubble. It’s not that I didn’t care about the issues that plagued our society, but I didn’t see an avenue for me to make a significant difference.

    While I don’t remember the books we read, the topics we discussed, or even the themes of any of the papers I wrote, I do remember how you highlighted the inequality in society. You prepared us for the discrimination we’d likely face in our respective careers. However, you never told us what to think or how to respond. Instead, you asked us questions that challenged me to see beyond my little bubble. You showed us women like your mother, former congresswoman Bella Abzug, who broke glass ceilings, stood up for themselves, and single-handedly paved the way for others. As a result, you created this desire within me to discover my power. Every time class finished, it felt as though you lit a match in my belly, as I felt this fire – an energy and excitement that came with believing I could tackle inequality and win one battle at a time. It was you who made me think my voice matters in larger conversations.

    It’s been 16 years since your class, and that fire has transformed into a guiding light. It has influenced my choices and my path in life. While pursuing my childhood dream to become a sportscaster, I faced many of the struggles you told us we might experience in our careers. But instead of backing down, becoming a victim, or accepting our culture for what it is, I spoke up and forced change.

    Ultimately, I followed my heart and started a company called The Unsealed, which aims to empower voices and inspire people. My goal is to challenge our readers to realize their influence as we showcase diverse perspectives. I believe my purpose in life is to try and be the match that lights the fire in other people’s bellies.

    Professor Abzug, I signed up for your class to learn more about women leaders, but I had no idea you’d teach me to become one. It was in your class that I developed an unshakeable confidence, a relentless spirit, and a fearless attitude.

    The change I make for others all started with the change you influenced within me.

    Thank you!

    Lauren

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    • I grewup when Bella Abzug was a very active politician and a stellar example of feminism at its best. Feminism does not mean hating men, but promoting and accepting women as much as men. Strong women like Bella Abzug led a way and demonstrated how to not back down. How lucky you were to have a class with her son!

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      • It was her daughter!! Liz is amazing!!! She made me feel like I could change the world and now I am trying to do so. We had her on one of our weekly conversations. Maybe we will have her on again and you will get to meet her. Thank you for all your support. I appreciate you!! Hope your weekend went well!

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  • Fighting the Worrying Beast and Beating it Down

    Dear Worrier,
    How frustrating to feel like a basket case all the time. Most people, as they age develop a laisez fair attitude. They have lived the majority of the life and they are still able to take a breath. But not me. A few years ago in my early sixties I noticed I started to look at the dark side of life. I always worried I would experience a terrible tradegy in my life. Plane rides, car rides, covid, crowds, swimming in the ocean,big dogs all became frightening to me.
    As I aged, I had to learn to manage the worrying beast. Mornings had become the worst part of my day. I would just lay there and ruminate about a myriad of scary issues.
    I am happy to say I have learned a coping technique. Its a simple solution. I rise , walk my dogs and get busy with my daily activities. At this point I can feel the negative thoughts disappear. . For me, being productive and busy is what liberates me from the beast.
    Moving foward, I am determined to embrace and focus on the positive aspects of my life. My children’s acheivements,my new home, and the fact that my spouse and I have each other to navigate thru life. I know that there will always be trials and tribulations in my journey but there will also be immeasurable joy.

    Shelley Brill

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    • I also fight the worry beast. Unfortunately that beast has been with me since I was only 5 years old. I found that I clean a lot when I start to worry. It’s great until I crash. I’m glad that you found what works for you though. And I’m sure that joy will come with every waking day. Thank you for sharing.

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    • You are so right, and I love it. See, all you had to do was to stop just lying around thinking and worrying. Once you get busy, you don’t have much time to worry. I’m like you though, I worry a lot as well, about my daughter and grandkids and I mean a lot, but I noticed when I’m very busy, I don’t worry as much. When I’m home alone and I do live…read more

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  • Lauren Brill shared a letter in the Group logo of Mental HealthMental Health group 1 years, 9 months ago

    Dear Anxiety, You are my Achilles heel

    Dear Anxiety,

    You have been in my life for a very long time. I first met you when I was five or six years old. Even at that age, I thought I needed to be the best athlete, dancer, and student to stand out in the world and reach my larger-than-life dreams. My parents never pushed me, so I am unsure why you entered my life or why I felt so much pressure. But because of you, I had sleepless nights and daily body aches. You had way too much power for a very long time.

    Through the years, we have had our ups and downs. Sometimes, you consume me, and other times I have been able to keep you in check. The worst of you appeared in my late teens when a sexual assault led to paralyzing fear and endless stomachaches. I lost 30 pounds all because of you. Terrified about my health, I started to fight back against you. That’s when it hit me. I cause you.

    I discovered that you, Anxiety, are the result of my thought process, habits, and attitude. Once I realized I was in control, I started to pay attention to the activities and behaviors that made you less present. Exercise, writing, and conversations with family and friends all helped to stop you from overwhelming my life. The more I engaged in behaviors that helped me, the less you hurt me.

    In my 30s now, I recognize that you will probably never entirely disappear from my life. You are probably a part of life. But whether it’s stress from building my company or disappointment from a relationship, I now know how to take power from you. And that’s important because the less power you possess, the more happiness I can feel.

    Anxiety, you’re tough, but I am way tougher.

    Lauren

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    • Anxiety is such a tricky and confusing thing. In one way it keeps us on our toes, but too much of it can lead to such physical and emotional turmoil that you feel you can barely get out of bed. When anxiety starts at such a young age as 5 or 6 years old, it makes you wonder if you were hard wired that way at birth…. I mean who suffers from…read more

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      • I agree completely. I think it definitely can be a part of our personalities. I am so hyper aware of it now, that I have learned different things I can do to keep it in check. But it definitely takes a lot of self-awareness and still creeps up at times. Deep breaths, exercises and lots and lots of hugs go a very long way :).

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  • How I surprised myself when I became a stripper in a high school play

    I remember when I was a little girl, about 8 years old I watched a movie with Marilyn Monroe. I thought she was so beautiful and glamorous. I decided I wanted to be an actress. This was the very last career suited for an extremely shy child who never spoke to any adults except her parents. But something about being on stage or in front of a camera excited me. My child’s mind told me I could be someone else on stage and be liberated from my timid personality.

    In 4th grade, I tried out for the class play and to my surprise, I got the lead. In high school, I was in chorus and performed in two plays. Amazingly, this shy 17 year old was chosen to play the role of a stripper in the play Gypsy. At first I was terrified to go on stage in a bikini costume in front of 1,000 people, but my high school drama coach insisted it would all be ok and I would be a big hit. When opening night came, I went out on stage as Electra, the stripper. I shook the light bulbs on my body. Well, this was definitely my glass ceiling and I shattered it. I was never shy after that night.

    I did not go on to be a great actress, but I did have a 40-year career in pharmaceutical sales, which required me to be very outgoing and confident. Sometimes life prepares you for your future without you even realizing it.

    Your life’s events are so pivotal and amazing.

    Shelley Brill

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    • What you said about life preparing you for the future is 100% correct. It may not be immediate but it slowly exposes you to things outside of your comfort zone to get used to. Thank you for sharing

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  • How my dream started

    Dear Unsealers,

    I remember the exact day I started to dream about my future. It was 1995, a year after the New York Rangers won the Stanley Cup. My dad took me to Game 4 of the second round of the postseason. The Rangers were playing the Philadelphia Flyers. New York was down 3-0 in the series, and we went to the game hoping we’d witness the beginning of New York’s comeback. While that didn’t happen, I still had an incredible night. Before the game, my father and I started walking toward our seats in the nosebleeds section when a woman approached us. She was a VP at ABC sports and told us she had an extra ticket in the first row. Then, she asked if I wanted it. Of course, I accepted. Luckily we found another seat nearby for my dad. As I asked this woman about her career, a light bulb went off. I could one day get paid to go to sporting events. My ten-year-old self was sold. That was the moment I decided I wanted to be a sportscaster. From that moment on, I was determined to make my dream happen.

    In college, I interned at CBS and ABC in their sports departments. During my junior year, I began working in the NBA’’s broadcasting department before accepting a job as a full-time writer. A year after graduating college, I got my first on-air job, working for MSG Varsity, a high school sports network in New York. Then, I worked as a reporter and anchor for local news stations in Buffalo, NY, and Cleveland, Ohio. From a World Series to the NBA Championship, I had the opportunity to cover some pretty incredible moments as I truly lived my childhood dream.

    However, after ten years, I realized I had developed new interests. As a sportscaster, I conducted a lot of interviews and fell in love with the art of storytelling. Meeting people from all walks of life made me more interested in social issues. I wanted to be an advocate and journalist, and after flying all over the country for interviews and meetings, I realized the job I wanted didn’t exist. So, I created it. I started my own company called The Unsealed, a platform that helps us amplify the stories and voices of people with various perspectives. I am genuinely thankful that I achieved my childhood dream because it was my dream that helped me discover my purpose.

    With love and hope,

    Lauren

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    • I believe you had a chance encounter with fate that day. You met someone who had a job that piqued your interest and that later became your job. I believe it was life’s way of pushing you to do something that involves what you love. Thank you for sharing

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  • Feeling Grateful for The Unsealed

    Dear Unsealers,
    This has been a difficult week for our country. I feel like we are more divided then ever. I am glad I can safely express my myself here at The Unsealed. Everyone needs an emotional outlet and that outlet is different for everyone. But I like being here and telling you all that I am grateful that we are kind to each other even when we disagree. Thank you all!
    Shelley

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    • I strongly agree that we all need an emotional outlet. I can’t imagine a life of not being able to express myself. I’ve noticed that this platform is exceptional for civil interactions.

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    • Right on, Love it. It’s always good to have someone or someplace else to vice your opinion, vent, speak with others about what’s happening all around us and with us. A great feeling!

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  • MEET ROGER

    Dear Unsealers

    Meet Roger! Roger lost his mother when he was 23 years old. Ever since, he has struggled with grief, anxiety and depression. He misses his mother who was a source of love and comfort in his life. One of his favorite memories of his mom is seeing her joy when she watched him perform in his first band concert in high school.

    While Roger has found healing in writing, giving back to others and expressing himself through photography, there are still days that he struggles.

    Write to Roger about your experience with loss, your favorite memories with your loved one and what has helped bring peace to your life and your grief. You can respond to this thread or post your own letter in this group or the group Remembering those we lost and tag Roger @oneturbobenz

    Share your truth and change the world.

    @abbiegwrites @alexandraparry @dsenlightenededits @falkytvgmail-com @gabriellebeth @lostone89 @delanomassey @jthomasdryandbarren-com @rkartikalestari @ashley_topham @brilee258 @braveheart @kayjahlorde @okiwa002 @amazz94 @jcbcle77 @corriefergusonbooks @jim-c @zaysmith1

    All the best,

    Lauren

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    • @oneturbobenz
      Dear Roger,
      It is always so painful to lose someone you love who is so very close to you. Their spirit and light is always with you. I feel your pain. I have lost both my dear parents and this loss is felt every day. But I will say that I always try to live each day with purpose and happiness because I know that is what my…read more

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    • I’m so sorry for your loss, and believe me I truly understand, especially when it comes to your mom. I lost my mom in 2016, and to this day, I still struggle with hurt, anger and disbelief, because I feel that she should still be here. I hated the way I wasn’t there when she passed, but feel I or someone in the family should have been. I hate that…read more

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  • I am so grateful to my family,

    Dear Unsealers,
    Recently I had surgery and it was a bit scary. It’s behind me now. I could not have gone thru this process without the support of my dear family. Thank you to my amazing children, Andrew and Lauren, for immediately stepping up and helping Dad and I make the right decision as to which way to proceed. Your research and involvement was so very crucial and so deeply touching. You both analyzed the situation, listened in on all consultations with the surgeons, asked the doctors important and very pivotal questions and helped me manage all my test results. You are my pillars of strength and my guiding light. Thank you to my husband, Alan, who always insisted on accompanying me to every test from cat scan to MRI to covid test you were right by my side and of course every consultation and then in the hospital thru surgery. You are my strength as well as being my post-op coach. You challenge me to get out of bed and walk, which the doctors have told us is important for a faster recovery. Thank you also to all my love ones who supported me and comforted Alan,Andrew and Lauren thru. this process. Thank you to my my sweet daughter -in-law, my caring sisters, my cousins, my extended family and my friends for being so supportive and concerned. You all are so important to me. It really does take a village and you are my village.
    From the bottom of my heart with much love and appreciation,
    Shelley

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    • Dear Shelley,

      That’s great that your surgery is behind you. It’s always great to have the support of our loved ones to help us through a tough time. I’m glad you had your children to help you and your husband make the right decisions on what to do. It must be a huge relief to have that behind you. Hopefully, you won’t have another surgery for a…read more

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      • Hello Gerald,
        Thank you for your kind words. I am having a relaxing summer recuperating. I am getting stronger each day. You are correct. I am very relieved the surgery is behind me. I hope you are having a nice summer. Stay safe and well. I wish you and your family health and happiness. I hope to see you on our next zoom meeting on…read more

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        • Hello Shelley,
          You’re welcome. I’m glad you’re having a relaxing summer and you’re getting stronger every day. I’m having a good summer so far, thank you! I’m really excited to use my vacation time next week! It’s time for another trip to the beach! I wish you and your family health and happiness too. Be safe out there! I should be at the next…read more

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  • Dear Sean, My Heart Is Hurting

    Dear Sean,

    Our friendship began the night we met. It was August 12, 2018 in downtown Cleveland. My friends and I ended up at a table at FWD nightclub with you and your friends. Thanks to your charm, and that handsome face, we immediately clicked.

    In a short time, I realized there was so much more to you than your good looks and your sweet personality.

    Over the next year, I got to know you pretty well. I opened up to you about my past. You were supportive and understanding. I shared with you the challenges I faced at the time, and you gave me strength, encouragement, and confidence. You also took me for sushi, became my pen pal (exchanging a billion texts a day), and helped me set the foundation for my business. Sometimes, I’d even get you to stop by my apartment just to give me a hug.

    As our friendship evolved, you’d often share your wisdom and perspective with me.

    Vividly, I remember you once telling me a lesson you learned while serving in the military. You told me you were pushed so much physically in the military that you realized that the moment you feel like giving up – the moment you feel like you have nothing left in the tank – you always have a bit more fight left. You can always go more.

    I left Cleveland in June of 2019. You came over and said goodbye to me. You told me we’d see each other again in Miami or when I returned to Cleveland. Little did I know that would be the last time I’d ever see you.

    About two months later, you texted me, “I have a miracle.”

    You proceeded to tell me, in text, about how a week earlier you had a seizure while home with your daughters. Your daughters called for help and got you to the hospital, where they found a tumor in your brain. You sent me videos and an actual picture of the tumor inside your brain. It was too much for me to absorb over text, and I asked you to call me, which you did.

    At that point, you still didn’t know if it was cancer, but you told me, “Don’t worry. Whatever it is, I will be OK.”

    When you officially told me it was cancer, I don’t think my mind could fully process the reality of the situation. In fact, I still don’t think I have fully processed it. As time passed, I checked in on you here and there, and we chatted about life and other things.

    When I first launched The Unsealed, you read nearly every letter, and signed up as one of my very first members.

    After I thanked you for signing up, you said, “Your stories are helping people, Lauren. Your strength/story is touching.”

    You made me believe that this lofty dream I was pursuing was not only possible but worthwhile.

    While we didn’t talk much about your cancer diagnosis, and you certainly never told me your prognosis, you did tell me your circumstance taught you that no matter what, you always have to look at life from a positive perspective. When I told you I felt like I hit a wall with my business, you told me to be thankful I am here to hit that wall, reminding me that each day is both a blessing and an opportunity.

    I used to tease you that you were a feminist, but you truly were, believing that women, including me, could be or do anything they so choose. I remember you even spent time on a weekend, helping teach young girls how to code.

    Your daughters were your world, and you never wanted to miss a volleyball game or dinner time. If I called you while you were watching a movie with one of your daughters, you wouldn’t answer. Your time with your children was precious to you – and that was true from the moment I met you.

    During your battle with cancer, you began to ride your bike – a lot. You decided to join the Great Cycle Challenge, aiming to ride your bike 200 miles in a month to raise money, not for yourself but for children battling cancer. You were among the top fundraisers in the country.

    In the most challenging moment in your life, you devoted your time and energy to helping others that were suffering.

    Sean, that is who you were. That is who all your friends and family know, love, and cherish.

    A little less than a year ago, I asked you how you were, and you told me you were OK and that you were going to try some experimental treatments. Without going into detail, I knew what that meant. I didn’t hear from you much after that, and I feel sad that I didn’t reach out as I should have. I think, subconsciously, a part of me didn’t want to face the reality of losing yet another young person close to me. I am sorry I wasn’t there for you as much as I should have been these last few months. I promise, it wasn’t because I didn’t care.

    A few weeks ago, I had a funny story I wanted to tell you – a mystery that I finally solved. When I texted you on your phone and Instagram and didn’t get a response, I knew it wasn’t good. Ultimately, your best friend and your mom filled me in. I am thankful I texted when I did, as I was able to send you cards and tell you how much you meant to me. Your mom even said that when you saw the card was from me, you had a huge smile across your face.

    I am absolutely heartbroken right now. You were one of the good guys and didn’t deserve a battle with brain cancer. With that said, I want you to know that the man beyond the charm and the handsome face has left an indelible mark on my heart.

    Because of you, I will keep fighting when I feel there is nothing left in the tank. I will keep pushing to build The Unsealed, motivated by the fact that I know it meant something to you and can and will help many other people. And I will always wake up every day with gratitude and a positive attitude.

    While I am mourning the loss of your life, I will continue to celebrate you through how I live mine.

    I miss you already. Thank you for genuinely caring about me. You will forever inspire me.

     

    With love and lots of hugs,
    Lauren

    P.S. I heart you.

    support brain cancer research disease by donating to:
    https://virtualtrials.org/strother.cfm or http://www.childrenscancer.org/seanstrother


    @delanomassey @shelleybrill @kayjahlorde @mehraslam @amazz94 @abbiegwrites @bigstudbundy @lostone89 @willardogan @wilparker1 @andbrill @zaysmith1 @gabriellebeth @ashley_topham @asyk @hue-jackson @dsenlightenededits @jerricaconley @jsimon @johncarubbagmail-com @qcurtis @redskinsjjv84 @okiwa002 @vbrooks884 @oneturbobenz @writingsfromthegarden @jcbcle77 @yourbabydaddy @zuckerman @corriefergusonbooks

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    • Dear Lauren:
      Today is Glioblastoma #GBM Day and as we shine the light on this devastating disease, I want to express my appreciation to you for using your platform – The Unsealed – to write this beautiful and poignant letter to my son Sean who at age 40, left us last month, too soon due to GBM. We are heartbroken.

      Your letter captured the e…read more

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  • shelleybrill shared a letter in the Group logo of Mental HealthMental Health group 1 years, 10 months ago

    I broke thru my insecurities in “Gypsy”

    Dear Teens,
    As a teenager, I too struggled with low self-esteem and insecurities. In high school I would watch other more confident students run for student government, try out for sports teams, cheerleading squad or audition for school plays. I never felt smart enough or athletic enough or even pretty enough to succeed at anything I went for in school. I was a prisoner of my own irrational fears. Then one day my english teacher, who was the drama club supervisor, suggested I try out for the yearly school musical. I was so afraid to go for it even though I secretly would have loved to be on stage. Well I decided to audition and lo and behold I got a part. The really scary thing was I had to play a stripper in the play “Gypsy”. I had to wear a skimpy costume in front of the whole school. I was terrified. Well opening night came. I danced and sang in front of 1000 people. That was the moment I learned that it is important to face your fears, try new experiences and know that its all part of our journey in life. That night I gained a lot of confidence. I suggest, don’t be afraid of the unknown. You will be surprised what you are capable of accomplishing. The sky is the limit!
    Shelley

    Shelley

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    • Dear Shelley,

      That takes major courage to play a stripper in a play. To sing and dance in front of 1000 people. Wow! I would had 100 panic attacks trying to stay calm on stage. That’s so cool you gain a lot of confidence after performing that part. I was asked to be a part of a church play when I was 16. But, my insecurity stopped me from being a…read more

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      • Hi Gerald, Thank you for your words of encouragement. I am sure that you have more then made up for whatever activities you missed put on in n high school. Its never too late to be in n a play or do the intimidating things we were all afraid to try in high school. I am sure you would have been great then but you will be even better now. Always…read more

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        • You’re very welcome, Shelley. And thank you for your encouraging words. Reading your reply gives me the hope to try new things (even if they’re scary). I love that sentence you wrote about how I’m much stronger and accomplished than I am in my head. I need to remind myself that more and more. Sometimes, self-doubt finds a way into my head and it…read more

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