Dear readers,
Living your dreams is something we are told to do as children but, the second we realize what our dreams are, they seem impossible to achieve. Nursing school is hard, 4 years of medical school, 4 years of residency, you graduate to be a teacher only to realize teaching is not all it’s cracked up to be. But, with the right support of your friends and family, your dreams are possible! You will become the neurosurgeon you’ve always wanted to be. You will be that special education teacher you’ve always dreamed about. My only advice I have is to Live Your Dreams and Never Give Up!!

It couldn’t have been easy to have a daughter that dreams as big as I do. You and I both always knew that I was destined for something greater. So you poured everything you had into me to make sure that no opportunity was out of my reach.

Pride doesn’t even begin to describe what I feel when I look at you. To know that my immigrant parents, without any sort of formal education and a life of fear, danger, and oppression, provided me with the best education and privileges this world has to offer… it fills me with a sense of responsibility.

I don’t dream big for me. I dream big for our bloodline.

Growing up, I often thought about how easily my life could’ve turned out differently. If you didn’t have the guts to uproot our family to a whole new world, if you weren’t lucky enough to get that Visa, if you simply decided to settle somewhere else, I would’ve had a completely different life. One that may not have had as many opportunities as the one I currently live.

When thinking about that, it felt like I was given a gift. One that I would be selfish to throw away. One that took generations of blood, sweat, sacrifice, and tears, to finally make a reality. The more I learned about the history of our world, the more I understood how wronged we were in it.

Slowly, that sense of responsibility turned into an overwhelming guilt. Why did I get to live such a beautiful life of privilege when none of my ancestors before me were afforded the same? How could I carry on knowing that I lived in a world biased against my own people?

You watched me as I struggled with this strife. You consoled me as this guilt slowly ate away at my mind. You stood by me and continued loving me even when the demons got the better of me. As I was making decisions that broke your heart, you were still there to help me mend mine.

Through your unconditional support, I slowly began to dream again – to believe that a brighter world was not only possible, but that it was up to me to create it.

As I began sharing my story – our story – with the world, you gave me the space to do so. As I started to understand that I wanted to dedicate my life to the journey of self-discovery, you told me to go for it. As I decided to take all of my education and opportunity and throw away the stability of a traditional, good-paying job, you never doubted my vision.

How did I get so lucky to have parents like you?

Thanks to you, I’ve made a name for myself. I stand for something greater than myself. I teach, inspire, and encourage others to embrace everything about who they are because you taught me how to do that.

You taught me to never doubt myself and so that is exactly what I did, even when not doubting me meant taking on doubt from you. Still, I stood strong, like you showed me to do, and slowly showed you the vision I’ve been seeing all along.

Now, look at us! A family of business owners with a world of opportunities at the horizon.

We did it.

And by “we”, I don’t just mean me, you, and my sisters. I mean all of us. Dhadha, and Dhadi, and everything they did to raise you into the parents you became. Their parents after them and all that they taught them. All of our ancestors and every decision they made to make our bloodline as strong as it is to have made it here.

We did it. We finally made it to living a life of opportunity instead of a life of survival.

You see, dreams do come true. But, they aren’t made over night or even over one lifetime. Dreams are forged through the strife, the pain, the values & virtue, the traditions, the struggle, the hustle of generations of human existence.

We all carry the history of the people that came before us, and with that, the dreams.

So, Mommy & Papa, I know having a daughter that dreams as boundlessly as I do can be overwhelming at times. But, I think you always knew to some degree that I dream so largely and loudly because you never got to.

None of us ever got to until now. Until me.

I hope I make you proud in dreaming so loudly for all of us. Time to put our name on the map.

My bright light blinds most, no sunglasses will help
That is a fact that makes most mad
I used to not get why, but I figured it out –
My light illuminates what you run from
Illuminates all your fears and doubts
You seek the illusion of healing through drinking, smoking, sexing, popping, sniffing
Basically whatever buries your feelings
Convincing yourself that that is what cures your inside dealings
Not accepting that your running from your own war
You know the one you feel way down deep in your core
So when you see “lil ol me” you think
Who does she think she is? She acts like shes better than everyone else
Nah this is just what confidence looks like
And the truth is confidence used to feel so weird to me
Like learning how to ride a bike
But I used to wonder why not clap for me? Be happy for me? Proud of me? Why not support me? Cheer me on a little?
So I sat down and I had to figure something else out
People can only treat you as good as they treat themselves
I mean think about it, how would anyone give you more love then they give their own self?
So I can’t let what you say or portray bother me
Especially when your on a level that I used to be
One I had to train myself overtime to continuously flee
That is why you won’t understand what I do and you definitely won’t agree
You can’t see that what I’m doing is actually what makes me free
I no longer can let what you say affect me from doing me
Lil ol me is moving onto big ol lil me things
Sorry but not sorry if that makes your insides sting

When I make peace with where I am
I find myself feeling more
appreciation again, and then
the intuitive impulses start
coming in—so I can begin
taking aligned action. And these
steps lead, inevitably, to enjoying
the experience of being me.

In short, appreciation
for where I am transports me
to where, who and how
I want to be. But then—
again, I am back, it seems
—seeking the realization of new
as-yet-unfulfilled dreams—except
this time I understand
that the only thing in the way
of my realizing them
is the way this moment
is perceived.

So I make peace
with where I am, and find
appreciation again, for the fact
that I am always on the right path,
and it’s all working out in
my favor, ultimately.

what if you could not speak for two years
you only had your two ears
now you are listening to your peers
checking out Instagram, it appears
they got plenty of souvenirs, but yet volunteered in their careers

too afraid to be the engineers to forge a whole new frontier
paid education can teach us to adhere to the profiteer
head hunters poach us and sell us to the highest-bidding auctioneer

shit appears severe,
but you are a pioneer, fuck that career
this is the year to do something for the world that is truly dear to your heart
You are too smart not to start,
failure may come, you might have to restart
your heart be pure, but fear can outsmart
telling us that shit is too hard
don’t be jarred the universe has pulled your card

your ancestors are standing guard,
telling you to manifest your wildest dreams, they will safeguard
jump into the deep end the universe is your lifeguard
sending you messages in your dreams like postcards

8 years ago today I defended my Master’s Thesis at the University of Kentucky, titled:

Healthy Reintegration: The Effectiveness of Military Teen Adventure Camp Participation of Adolescent Perceptions of Self-efficacy

I remember the day vividly, I was a nervous wreck, standing in front of a room full of people with my insecurities—believing that somehow everyone witnessing was somehow smarter or better than me.

If I could speak to that version of me at 25, I would tell her that you are enough today and you will only continue to get better. You will go on to complete a PhD at a R1 institution (Florida State University) defending one on many Goliath’s in your life (dissertation) during the onset of covid—against all odds. Ignore the disempowerment and doubt including, the words from your thesis advisor, “If you keep writing like this, Florida State will never accept you into their PhD program”. (Academia really has a unique way of shattering any bit of confidence you have).

I would tell her that being from the south or from a perceived “less than” background won’t hold you back—it is your perceived lack that will fuel your drive to finish whatever you start. It will fuel you to put yourself out there. It will fuel you to leave your comfort zone. It will fuel you to never quit. It will empower your relationship and reliance on God. So run your race boldly and well — you lack nothing and God is always with you (Deut. 31:8)

#chaseyourdreams

To the Beauties reading this note,

Following your dreams… Now this was always some quite the controversy in my house growing up. One parent stating you need to dream big the world is your oyster–the other saying you do not want to dream too big otherwise you will get left behind. Now I am writing to you all to say live for you. That’s what I am in the midst of doing. I started with the bare thinking I could not do much more than being a student and going to school; however, in my time away I learned I should have always listened to what the first parent told me. Keeping my identity low as I do not want to cause any fusses in the midst of the beginning: I have so many dreams that I can not wait for all of them to see.
Do not be afraid to express who you are!
Sometimes it takes going away to see the light at the end of it all.
If you feel afraid: know I am in your corner.
I love each and everyone of you.
May you all walk through this world with the blessings you each deserve.

In a town where promises are plenty and the government hands out aid,
A question echoes softly, under the shade.
“Why try hard, why aim high, when help is just a call away?
Why bother with the struggle, if you’re okay day by day?”

The government says, “We’ll help you, keep you safe and fed,
You won’t need to worry, we’ve got your back,” they said.
But this kindness has a shadow, a kind of hidden chain,
It keeps you in your place, with not much to gain.

“Why go for the mountain,” some wonder, “when the valley’s just fine?
Why face the storm, when you can just recline?”
Because in that easy comfort, there’s a trap so sly,
It tells you, “Don’t bother,” and time just passes by.

But some folks aren’t buying, they want to chase their own dream,
Not just live on handouts, or so it would seem.
They talk about doing things, making their own way,
Not just taking what’s given, but having their say.

They gather in the streets, their voices loud and brave,
“We want to earn our keep, not just quietly behave.”
For freedom and the chance to chase what they deem sweet,
To work hard for their wins, and not just take a seat.

So why aim for something bigger, why try to break free?
It’s about making your own path, as far as I can see.
Not just going with the flow, but steering your own boat,
And in that hard-earned journey, you’ll have your own note.

So let’s not be fooled by an easy ride, bought and sold,
But aim for the horizon, with courage bold.
The road might be rougher, and the climb can be steep,
But in that effort, you’ll find a joy so deep.

15 and pregnant to a monster all because I was trying to escape the pain of my horrific childhood of emotional, mental, and sexual abuse. I allowed myself to get manipulated and trapped time and time again. Even though I was the last person everyone thought would get pregnant including myself, it happened and everyone told me I was messing up my life but I tell you what. Having my kid was my saving grace and likely changed my path for the better. Yes, I continued to make many terrible and embarrassing mistakes along the way but I would come out strong and rise above all that attempted to pull me down into the trenches. I moved from house to house and tried to date after leaving his biological father to find myself with the wrong types over and over again and creating situations for myself that would only destroy me and my son if I allowed it to. I got accepted to modeling and I couldn’t afford my portfolio. I considered joining the Air Force and couldn’t imagine leaving my son that long for training. I worked dead-end jobs over and over and then I gave up, again. I felt defeated. I started thinking, maybe they were right. I worked in a pizzeria with a pedophile boss who would later make the news. But then finally, I would meet a group of people who would help me see my true and worthy self. They didn’t see me as a person young and dumb but encouraged me to keep going and to fight for my future; our future (with my son). So, I did just that. I no longer entertained the idea of needing a man to make my family complete. Instead, I worked full-time as a bartender, went to college full-time, received public assistance, and was a mom full-time while juggling my personal life. I would meet my husband in college, get pregnant twice, then get married. That’s 3 boys and a husband with a college degree! Now I am an office manager of 13 years, and I own my home. I never thought this would ever be my life. Our oldest (27) is getting married to his high school sweetheart of the 9th grade in August (no kids), our middle son (20) is graduated and figuring out his path in life (no kids) and our baby son (17) is a senior in high school, no kids. My point is, I have had more trauma, pain, and disappointment than anyone should have so young. It started in my mother’s womb and carried on for far too long and then I allowed more along the way until I snapped out of the cycle and said no more. I will not allow this to be my life. I deserve and want better. I had a support system and I had dreams. While some of my dreams didn’t happen ultimately my big dream did. All because I didn’t give up and continued chasing my dreams. Mike Tyson said “I’m a dreamer. I have to dream and reach for the stars, and if I miss a star then I grab a handful of clouds.” My dream, my ultimate dream; health, family, success, love, support, respect, compassion, and understanding. I may have not been able to grab one star and I know I reached for the handful of clouds but boy I tell ya. I have all the stars in the universe right here with me!

A lot of artists are scared Artificial Intelligence will replace them but as an Artist, I have found it to be a useful tool. I’m a writer and when I was younger, I’d draw characters and scenes for my stories to inspire me and help create the plot. Lately I’ve been using AI to draw my characters and sometimes it comes up with wild ideas and I incorporate this in my stories. I invite every artist to not be afraid of A.I., but to see it as partner in helping you become a better artist, I even created an AI instagram model to help promote my company. I’m also a filmmaker and working with AI to create a movie using AI and human actors. We should realize AI is not going anywhere and we can use the potential of it to help chase our dreams and make them become reality, The photo is me and my AI instagram model Jac

Lauren, you are to be commended. A few years ago, you had an idea: Create a judgment-free zone online where people could write letters to one another for the purpose of inspiring and uplifting.

It’s worked out handsomely for you. You’re now a published author with a compilation of selected writings from this site soon to be released and another one’s on the way in February.

This is a special day for you. It’s your birthday, a time for celebrating another trip around the sun and taking stock in what you’ve accomplished this year.

You’ve done plenty turning a little website that could into a dedicated community, one which I’ve been part of for close to four years. You’re a champion of The Unsealed and all of its members.

You’re OUR champion, Lauren. Bravo! Happy birthday!

Dear Unsealed Family

We’ve all been there, trying to UNSEAL a bottle, and we just can NOT.

After a million tries, we take a break and glance at our hands, only to see them bright red from our work, which, until this point, hasn’t borne fruit.

We might even see a blister and wash our hands (reluctantly) because we know that once that hand even has the slightest bit of soap, it will be the most painful “bee sting” we’ve had in our life – until the next time it happens.

Taking a deep breath, we jargon back to that YouTube video we watched, showing us how to breathe correctly and might utter an expletive to vocalize how upset we are that we don’t practice this routine more.

Going back to the bottle, we FINALLY UNSEAL that cap. Hearing that pop sound gives a sense of relief and accomplishment equivalent to successfully climbing up Mount Everest.

Opening up that bottle and hearing the cap pop off is the equivalent of taking that one extra step to get what you want in life!
If we do NOT assume that step, life, itself, will ALWAYS have a cap and make us REGRT that the bottle was NEVER UNSEALED!

This grand plan we have in our heads to write a book, become an Adaptive Clothing Model, public speak, etc, are things we want to do, but if we want to do them, we HAVE to TAKE ACTION!!

This action is NOT meant to be taken ALONE and reach “Mount Everest” RIGHT AWAY,; it’s having JOY EVERY TIME WE get CLOSER to UNSEALING that Bottle!!!