Another day rises from the ground
But with a different flavor to it
A day of traveling and clearing the cluttered mind
And also creating a wonderful time

Let the special day start with eating some delicious breakfast
Food that speaks to my soul
That makes me feel whole
And inspires me to conquer the road

When the road and I meet
Some of my favorite songs and I greet
Like it’s the first time
We’re getting to know each other’s mind
As I unwind during this special time

While jamming and cruising on an unknown highway
Various historical statues and beautiful land catch my eye
Giving me a positive high
That I don’t want to end
But continue to ascend

And embrace this rare feeling
A beautiful beach awaits me
And hypnotizes my eyes
With its waves

It waves at me and says ‘’come on in’’
But, before I take my first jump
I just want to stare at its beauty
And take a million pictures of it

Then I charge to the calming water
Like a soldier ready to do battle
But only remain in the safety zone
While watching others enjoy themselves

The perfect ending to a perfect day
It would be great to have another perfect day tomorrow
If only this could become a reality.
For now, wishing and dreaming about it will surface

Sincerely,
Gerald

Dear Unsealers, (poem entry, not a letter)

when it should have been the beating, red vessel sandwiched between my outside eyes

if it were for the before days when society was feeling abandoned

where the imposter we saw in the shadows were terrified news hosts and burnt out brethren retiring from their zoom calls

i would have have fallen further beneath the undertow

but the continued dance of shaking hands and friendly smiles made the chain of events commence

and i began to embrace it:

my lips exhale the affirmed words of safety

the stares of the narrow-minded turn into LED bulbs-

hang on… there might be something here

open-mindedness is taking off its apron, rushing to greet me at the door,
i used to get nervous having company

but i have become my own best friend

i can snuggle in safety, buckle in my seatbelt as my brain indicates to me i have permission to slow down and pump the breaks – once i have learned to drive

i can touch my 8 x 11, knowing every jagged line is a mountain, ripple, pique and valley of a memory burned through trial and error-

my oddly favorite smell, a worked-out body

the feeling of ecstasy after nailing an impromptu choreography routine, loving the expressions i feed the mirror

i can now ignore the lights getting brighter, signaling my ending is near

and sure, i am only but a human. i have always seen where i’ve faltered, lacked, detracted. but i can feel myself become something grander – like a human version of a wind-up toy

i’ve accepted my body as a vessel, an input output machine like gradeschool homework, correcting my body when i set my skin on fire-

*takes a breath*

i have eczema

i’m slowly conquering the line between conceit and self-awareness

discovered obsessive sorries are empty pockets of exoneration

i replaced apprehension for curiosity, my pulse now beating within reason as the flicker of answered questions make way

“what’s that?” is now celebrated, not mocked with disgust by the random grump on the street

i recognize myself. really.

i’ve changed “i’m so pretty” to “there you are… i’ve been looking everywhere for you.

wow. you are magnified.

here’s your handle.

now hold on tight. you’re only going up.”

Love,
Me (Meghan Dhawan)

Dear Me,

Self-love has been a journey of a million miles after being torn down time and time again, insulted, hurt emotionally and physically. Self-love is difficult when you’re used to being lied to so much that your mind suddenly becomes your biggest bully. As I wrote in my poem about bullying that’s entitled Target “[when] the weight of the impact hits you repeatedly you learn how to fall apart without learning how to put yourself back together.” Self-love, that’s the chapter I’m on right now. I’ve read the words of Scripture that say “love your neighbor as yourself (Mk. 12:31)” and prayed for the courage to love myself as deeply as I love others. I’ve sat in the Confessional where a priest in persona Christi (in the person of Christ) pinpointed that I don’t love myself well. I’ve made many a visit to my therapists office with a self-love workbook in tow hoping that learning about it will help me to live it. It’s not perfect but I am learning.

I love how I’ve been unlearning the things I’ve learned from those who were trying to steal my light.

I love how despite the setbacks and difficulties you keep trying to put yourself together after you fall apart.

I love how you will say yes to anyone who asks you to dance because you want everyone to feel what it’s like to be accepted.

I love how you are everyone’s cheerleader. You believe so ardently in the beauty of other people’s dreams.

I love how excited you get when you get good news—you can hardly contain it and you just have to share with someone.

I love how you refuse to let apathy consume you but how you feel deeply and unapologetically.

I love how you speak from the heart.

I love how you valiantly stand up for the things you believe in even if no one is following you.

I love your tenacious spirit, your determination, and grit.

I love your ambition and drive to accomplish wonderful and beautiful things.

I love how you have a mother’s heart even though you have no children of your own.

I love that you want to heal the whole world with love.

But most of all if there is anything I love about you it’s this.

That even though the world has been so unkind to you, you choose to keep your heart soft and to be so kind to everyone you encounter.

Darling there is so much to love about you.

And I know that sometimes you forget that sometimes so I wrote this letter to you so when you’re down or discouraged and can’t remember any reason to love yourself you’ll have these 13 reasons to choose self-love.

Sincerely,

I unapologetically love me unconditionally
I apologize to my past selves for doing it indiscriminately
In order to be my best self would mean I am elated
It took a while and I’m proud to say it’s been reinstated
I do what makes me happy especially my inner child
She’s is so over the moon that her little heart smiles
She loves to color, sing and dance like no one is watching
It’s the growning soul and the little soul that are interlocking
She’s making all versions of her past self morph into her best self
Her happiness is her version of a prosperous wealth
Self love is psychological, spiritual growth and physical
With a proportional rainfall strictly biblical
It’s my definition and my own version
I am uniquely my own person
Thank you, God, for all that you have done for me and my family
I only got one life, and I want to do it right by being happy
No one can do me better than me. My only competition is me
My lessons are mine to learn only I would know
The path it took to get here and I’m not done though
I learn daily and I don’t claim to be perfect because I am human
I have to remind myself that life is a classroom
I’m not afraid of the lessons I let them pass through
I owe it to my heaven sent angel and angel who fluttered with his wings
You both are my life and light and also are my kings
It’s because of you I unapologetically love me unconditionally

Dear Gerald,

Loving yourself
is like putting a warm blanket
to shield me from the brutal cold
that’s eager to enter my place
and take over my space

but my increased self-love
from above
inside my mind
reminds me
to protect the warmth
I have inside my vessel
and keep my heart alive
from those who wish harm and hate
to crush my mental state
and conquer me

like a conqueror wanting new land
to bring his/her band
to rule in sinister ways
and cause darker days
for the conquered

self-love
is a must for us all
to stand tall
in the face of adversity 
that will persist to threaten our peace
and try to cease
the love 
that we worked hard to keep
for ourselves 
and show others the way
to love themselves all-day

self-love is a non-stop process
that we must maintain to have success
in loving ourselves 
 On your self-love journey
I wish you well
so that you can have a self-love story to tell

I have to say that 2023 has been pretty kind to me. It’s been a good year and I’ve embarked on adventures that I never would’ve imagined in my wildest dreams. That being said it was difficult to choose my favorite moment of the year, however one rises above all the others.

Picture this….

It was my birthday. The July heat warmed my face as I woke to the sound of kids playing at a nearby park in the suburbs of Chicago. I was a long way from my home in Maine but it didn’t feel that way because my other half—my better half—my twin sister was sleeping in the room next door. I woke with gratitude for another day, for a new year of life beginning, for the life of my sister (who is my best friend), for the chance to do life together and much more. I say a quick prayer thanking God for these blessings as I soak up the rays of sun shining through the window and wait for my sleepy sister to wake up.

Our first adventure of the day was to get to Starbucks to get our free birthday beverage. As she sipped on her iced caramel macchiato and I sipped on my honey flat white we walked to a nearby nail salon to get pedicures all the while chatting about our hopes, dreams and goals for the next year.

When we reach the nail salon we settle in for some rest and relaxation. I choose a lighter purple color and my sister chose a pale blue color. The shades of nail polish we chose are total opposites, yet complement each other quite well just like my sister and I do. I look over to her as she’s getting her nails done and see her smiling and I smile too knowing that she is happy.

With our tummies rumbling we head over to P-Quads, a deep dish pizza restaurant that both my sister and my dad raved about. As we walked in the heavenly smell of pizza cooking wafted its way to my nose. We ordered a pepperoni deep dish pizza and devoured several slices of pizza before tapping out.

We headed back to my sister’s apartment and got ready for the main reason I was in Chicago (besides seeing my sister) to see Ed Sheeran perform in Solider Field. The previous Christmas my sister had gotten me tickets to the concert. I had waited for this for half a year and now it was here. The anticipation and excitement grew as I got ready.

Before leaving for the concert my sister and I blew out our candles had a few bites of our cheesecakes that we had ordered from the Cheesecake Factory a few days before. Each bite was creamy, delicious and super rich.

Finally we left for the concert. We arrived at Soldier Field and walked up to the humungous stadium. Khalid came out and the excitement was palpable. With enthusiasm and energy he worked the whole crowd. With the excitement at its peak Ed Sheeran came bounding onstage. I could not believe I was actually there, I have been a fan of his for a long time and here he was in the same vicinity as me. You could say I was a little star struck, even though Ed is such a humble guy. More than that a feeling of deep wonder and gratitude filled my being. How this birthday was so different than the last birthday I’d had where I’d spent the day alone, grieving the loss of my grandparents, wondering if I was seen or known. Ed sang his little heart out and the crowd shared moments of joy, laughter, tears as we sang along to his songs. As the concert was about to end Ed instructed us to take out our phone and use our flashlight on our phone and as he sang we waved our phones in the air as we took in the lyrics, the melody, the moment.

I have to admit that 2023 has been kind to me and that there have been many good moments this year, but this one tops them all. It was a perfect day spent with one of my favorite people, treating ourselves, eating good food, and watching one of my favorite pop artists sending lyrics which encapsulate both the beauty and messiness of life into the humid night air. I felt at peace. I felt seen and known in the moment. I could not help but smile from ear to ear and soak in each moment. And even now the memory washes over me and fills me with a wonder and gratitude that I know I will remember for the rest of my life.

Dear Unsealers,

Being grateful is something that I don’t do enough 
especially when life is rough
but when the grateful spirit enters the mind
A great wave of gratitude gives me joy inside  

There are so many things I’m grateful for 
and have me eager to see what more
 life has in store

I’m grateful every day to have another chance
and to start a new dance
I’m grateful for another day to choose
even when I have the blues

I’m grateful that I was given the blessing of life 
even though it’s filled with constant strive
I’m grateful for the life experiences that I’ve had
Some happy and some deeply sad

I’m grateful that I’m in a different place
when years ago, my head was in a different space
I’m grateful for the many connections I’ve made
some connections remained, while others faded away

I’m grateful for the achievements I’ve accomplished so far
they make me feel that it’s possible to reach the stars
And I’m grateful to be in a position to be able
to express feeling grateful