Dear Dad,

I can’t remember the exact day or even the precise year that this memory took place. At the time, I was working for MSG Varsity, a high school sports network in the New York metropolitan area. I was probably about two years out of college and maybe 23 or 24 years old. That job was a breakthrough. It was my first steady on-air job. Before getting an offer to work for MSG, I must have been rejected by 100 stations. I was pursuing what many thought to be an impossible career as a TV sports reporter. So many naysayers told me I was wasting my time and my education. But not you, Dad. You told me never to give up on a dream. You told me you believed in me and tried to provide any resources possible to help me succeed.

That’s why this moment, which I am about to share, meant so much to me.

See on this day, I walked into work and everybody was buzzing about Emmy nominations. I was a young reporter in the number one market in the country, so my expectations were low. Then, just as I was about to start writing a script, one of my coworkers told me to check the Emmy nominations. They said they were almost sure they saw my name listed. I don’t remember if I read a hard copy or if I looked at the nominations on my computer or someone else’s computer, but I got a hold of the list, and sure enough, my name was printed twice. In my first year as a reporter, I received two Emmy nominations in the number one market in the country. Before saying anything to anyone, I went into the stairwell and started to cry as I called you to tell you the news.

That’s the moment that is etched in my memory forever. That’s the moment I will never forget. I remember how I felt overwhelmed with emotion and how I could barely even get the words out to tell you. I remember how happy you were to hear the news and how you told me to stop crying.

It wasn’t so much the recognition from the industry or that I got to go to the ceremony and wear a pretty dress that made that moment so special. Don’t get me wrong. All that was great too. But at that moment, I felt I had proved that your unwavering support and belief in me were worthwhile. That you didn’t waste your time or money investing in my dreams.

A decade and change later, I have yet to win an Emmy, even though I was nominated five more times after that. But that moment in the stairwell means more to me than any trophy. That five-minute phone call celebrating with you and hearing the pride in your voice were and are the only prizes that ever mattered to me.

I love you, Daddy. Thank you for always believing in me.

Dear Unsealed Community,
When I was in my first semester of college at C. W. Post I was very unhappy. I had never been away from home for any length of time or away from my parents. I was also a very sheltered 18 year old so I was a bit unprepared for the typical college bad behavior that goes on. Adding to this, I did not get along with my roommate or her boyfriend who was always sleeping in the small room with us. All this was a recipe for a case of extreme homesickness. I was heartbroken and needed my parents to be back in my life on an every day basis.
I made the difficult decision to leave a beautiful 4 year college and apply to the community college near my home in Rockland County. My parents thought it was a poor decision. They felt I was cheating myself out of the full college experience. But I needed to sleep in my own room and be in a smaller college environment where it was easier to make friends. I wanted smaller classes and a few more familiar faces at school. That is the beauty of community college.
As I look back on that unusual shift in my life, I feel sure I made the right decision. From the first day in of community college, I was happy. The teachers were interesting and caring. I was able to engage in in depth conversations because the class size was smaller. As the semester progressed, I made some great friends and also did extremely well in all my studies. But most importantly, I was back in the loving comfort of my home. I have much gratitude for my dear parents, Bess and Calvin Kalstein for supporting my decision to take a step back in my life. Sometimes going back is ok because it propels you to go forward.

With love,
Shelley

Dear Mom,

Growing up, I didn’t always appreciate you as I do now. I didn’t fully understand you as a child because our dreams were so different. At ten years old, I was outspoken and already very career driven. You always liked working and wanted to do well, but you never had a burning desire for a promotion or more responsibilities. For a long time, I thought you were less ambitious than me, but as the years passed, I learned that that’s not exactly correct.

Mom, you are the backbone of our family. When a crisis hits, you are the one we all turn to for comfort, support, and wisdom. You have this incredible ability to calm us all down while providing logical advice. When I got rejected by my crush in elementary school, you were the one who sat in my bed and told me I was beautiful. When I decided to go to private school 40 minutes from our house and then play for a travel soccer team 40 minutes away in the opposite direction, you (and dad) spent hours in the car, driving me back and forth. When I was worried about getting into college, you were the one who told me you were proud of me regardless of which school accepted me. When I opened up about my assault, you were the one who told me my response was normal and OK. When my ex-boyfriend passed away, you were the one who held my hand at the funeral. And when I started my business, you spent days on end sending out emails for me.

Mom, I have come to realize that you were and are very ambitious. You wanted, more than anything, to foster a loving family and you did whatever it took to make that happen. As a family, we have endured difficult situations together, and you have handled each with strength, grace, selflessness, and love. Every day, you have made our family a priority. To this day, you help us persevere through the most challenging moments of our lives, while also supporting us as we chase our wildest dreams.

Mom, you may not have wanted to be a boss in a boardroom, but you were/are one heck of a CEO in our household.

I am proud to be your daughter, as I admire and love you more than you’ll ever know.

With love,

To Those Who Doubt Themselves,

Most people never discover how far their talents can take them.

Instead, it is so easy to let doubt hold you back. It’s so easy to ponder if you are smart enough, good enough, or have the stamina to climb the mountain you see ahead. And, of course, it doesn’t make it any less daunting when you have naysayers – people who say you can’t do it. But what I want you to know and what my journey thus far has taught me is that you’re in control of your destiny.

There are so many instances in life where I was scared to pursue a challenge. When I got accepted to an Ivy League school, I didn’t think I was smart enough to attend. When I decided to start a business, I didn’t know if I had the experience or resources to pull it off effectively. And when recently, I decided to start learning how to code websites, I honestly didn’t know if my brain could absorb a computer language.

As I questioned my abilities in those circumstances, other people also doubted me. Here are just a few comments I heard from people:

“You’re not as smart as the other kids who go to Columbia. You won’t do well there.”

“Do you know how many people fail at starting a business? You’re wasting your time.”

“How are you going to learn to code on your own? There are so many levels to it. You’ll never be able to be proficient in it.”

Despite my doubts, and the doubts of others, I pursued each challenge anyway.

I repeatedly told myself, almost like a religious mantra, “If someone else can do this, I can do it too. If someone else can do this, I can do it too.”

I made the dean’s list every semester during my last two years at Columbia(I think). My very first post, when I started my business, went viral. And with computer code, I found a cheap course online, and I am enjoying learning to code. It’s actually coming to me pretty easily so far.

So, don’t listen to any of your doubters. They are projecting their fears onto you. Always have confidence in yourself because right now, you have no idea what you can accomplish in your life. But I promise you, if you take a chance, if you have a little faith in yourself, and never give up, you just might be one of the lucky ones to find out.

With Love,

To My Dear Little One,
I have waited for you for a long time. I pictured myself holding your little body and playing with you. I do so love my family and the thought of expanding my loving unit thrilled me to no end. After all I have 2 beautiful children that have always filled my life with so much joy. Adding a new person would only expand my world with new purpose and happiness.
Then it finally happened. The day I was waiting for with baited breath. You finally arrived. That very first time I held you was so sweet. My heart soared. You were so perfect. Now you are getting bigger and every day your smile brightens my day. I love our face-time meetings. I am excited to see the changes that happen every day as you get bigger and bigger. You are an amazing baby.
My love for you has added a new dimension to my every day life. You give me a moment of respite in my busy and sometimes stressful day. You are also so much fun to talk to in our baby talk love language. In addition, every day I try to think of a brand new love song to sing to my dear baby boy. My voice is terrible but you don’t seem to mind.
Thank you dear sweet little love for bringing so much sunshine into my life. To you my dear baby boy, as my sweet grandma Lottie would say to me in Yiddish ” Gut Guzunt” and much “Simchas” in your life.
Your Grandma,
Shelley

Dear Sports,

Sometimes love comes into our lives early and easily. That’s the case with you. I remember meeting you around age four or five, but it could have been even younger. I lived on a cul-de-sac, and all the kids on our street would regularly play kickball in the circle. We’d play for hours, sometimes mixing in tag or hide and seek. Without much effort, I could always keep up with the older kids. And every time I tried a new sport, it took me no time to figure it out. But it wasn’t until my parents signed me up for organized soccer with kids my age that I realized I was athletic. I was faster than everyone else. And scoring goals was easy. Immediately, I was hooked. I loved competition. And quite frankly, I loved winning.

While I played many sports throughout my childhood, soccer became my primary sport. I played on club, school, and select teams. Soccer allowed me to see the world, as I was chosen to play on a team that competed as far as Italy when I was 15 years old. Besides competition, sports introduced me to my best friends – many of whom I am still close with now.

I am forever grateful that you, sports, came into my life.

As an adult, I no longer play on competitive sports teams. And I probably don’t work out as much as I should. But you are still an essential part of my life. You shaped me into the person I am today. You, sports, taught me how to push through adversity. You showed me the power of a good and consistent work ethic. Through you, I developed tremendous confidence and mental toughness, which serves me well every single day of my life. And when I have a long week or am frustrated or scared, I can still turn to you for peace. I’ll rollerblade along the water for miles or lift at the gym.

While many loves in our life come and go, there are some rare ones that not only come early and easily but also last a lifetime.

I love you always.

Your old friend,

To people who are too hard on themselves.
When I meet young people who have low self esteem or lack confidence it makes me sad. I was raised with a lot of love so I always felt special. But many people come from homes where there isn’t a lot of support. As a result there is no one to bolster them up when they fail. I wish I could be there for all the young people who need someone to tell them its ok to have setbacks. I would tell them they must keep trying because eventually they will succeed. And I will always be there to catch them if they fall.
When I was a 7th grade teacher in New Jersey I had a student who was failing math. When I would meet with this young girl she told me she just couldn’t keep up with the class in this subject. She just felt getting a good grade would be impossible for her. She was sad and dejected. As a teacher, it was my job to bolster her up. So thats what I did. I gave her private tutoring sessions 2 times a week for several months. Slowly but surely her test scores went higher and higher. She started to feel more confident in her math skills. By the end of the year she had a B average in math. How very rewarding that moment was for both of us.
I have learned so much by just journeying thru life all these many years. We all have our own personal strength that we can tap into when needed. I also believe we are not an emotional island. We must all reach out and seek support. If your heart is open you will find that there is love all around you. You just have to be willing to accept the miracle so appropriately put by Hilary Clinton.. It takes a village.

To someone who is too hard on themselves,

You must be so anxious and stressed. You never seem to be where you want to be in life. I know how you feel because I have felt this way, too. My older sibling was always smarter than me. As a child, he did better in school than me, and as an adult, he certainly makes more money than me. It is as though I have had this bar way above my head my whole life. And no matter how hard I work or how many times I try, I never seem to jump high enough to graze that bar with my fingertips. And yet, I never stop trying.

Throughout my adult life, I have worked weekends and nights. I have lost sleep as thoughts of work ruminate in my head, and I have pulled all-nighters just because I have felt like I needed to get more done. All too often, I find myself exhausted, stressed, and frustrated. And I have come to realize that those emotions are not helpful. I started my company, The Unsealed, 3.5 years ago, and until this past weekend, I hadn’t taken one vacation.

An opportunity to go to Disney World arose. And seriously, who can say no to Disney World? I attended shows, tried out new rides, and ate at new restaurants for three days. It was so much fun. I gave my mind a break – a moment to live in the present and enjoy the people in my life and the blessings surrounding me. I drove home on Sunday. Now, it’s Monday, and I feel refreshed and motivated. The weekend made me realize how important it is to come up for air sometimes.

For so long, I put pressure on myself and never took my foot off the gas. But that’s not healthy or productive. So, if you’re like me and push yourself very hard, I hope you learn to be kind to yourself, take breaks, and live in the moment. When you take days off, don’t think about work or whatever you are pushing yourself to do. Give your mind and your soul time to refresh, recharge and recalibrate.

Your ambition probably won’t ever go away. But what I have come to realize is that if you want to do your best in life, it’s vital that you feel your best.

Don’t measure your success with someone else’s bar. Prioritize your health and your happiness. And always appreciate where you are, where you’ve been, and where you’re going.

Kris,

I heard that your battle has become more challenging recently. That’s all I needed to hear to take the time to let you know that as part of your Unsealed family, we got your back Kris! This means as you and your family are in need of added strength I’d like to offer you even more prayers for your body to WIN THE FIGHT! More positive thoughts and vibes for you and everyone who supports you because they need it too. More blessings for the medical treatments provided to help defeat the opponent of your health.

I’m thankful I was able to hear you tell your story in our Unsealed meeting. Just know that your message was heard loud and clear. I have since made changes in my own life to improve my health because I felt inspired to do so. As great as your meeting was it would be even better to hear you tell your story again of your incredible comeback! Keep fighting and we’ll fight with you!!!!

Be blessed,

Jamie Ellifritz
Massillon, Ohio
Member – The Unsealed – November 2020

Dear Kris,

Last year, I stumbled upon a CNN article entitled, “I have got terminal cancer. Here is why I am prioritizing travel.” The article shared how you were diagnosed at 48 years old with late stage four colon cancer. Despite the diagnosis, you remained committed to the activities that bring you joy in life, which include spending time with your family and traveling around the globe. I immediately knew I wanted to share your story with our community. I knew you would represent what The Unsealed is about: resilience, kindness, and strength. However, there was one result of meeting you I didn’t see coming..

While The Unsealed is not nearly as well-known or as prominent as CNN, you immediately responded to me and happily agreed to share your story with me. You sat on zoom with me for more than an hour and shared with me the shock of discovering you had terminal cancer. You had this proud grin on your face as you told me how you captured your wife’s heart. And you told me about the abundance of joy you experience daily by being the father to your sweet, intelligent, curious young son, Braden. But more than just your story, how you approach life’s challenges clearly came across in our interview. And that is with boundless positivity and a pure heart. When you receive a cocktail of intense chemo, you do so with a cheerful disposition and kind words to share with the nurses and doctors who treat you. You don’t approach work or everyday life with a “Why me?” attitude, but instead, you see each day as a gift to enjoy with the people you love most. You are aware of the reality of your situation, but you do not let it take away from the people and places that make you smile, as you continue to travel the world and take walks on the beach with your wife and son.

After interviewing you, we posted your story on The Unsealed in a letter to your wife and son. Then, you spoke to our community on one of our weekly zoom calls. Your zest for life and your pursuit of positivity are contagious. In the following months, I noticed I became more disciplined about staying optimistic about the challenges in my life. While starting a business is not nearly as difficult as battling cancer, it’s the obstacle I currently face. And because of you, instead of dwelling on what is going wrong, I started to look at what is going right and figure out how to lean into those tactics more. When a strategy I implement doesn’t go as planned, instead of feeling frustrated, I look for the lesson and adapt accordingly. When I interact with people, no matter how my day is unfolding, I always try to lead with kindness. The mindset you have helped shape within me has impacted my productivity, patience, and happiness. And as my company has grown, the process has become less stressful and more joyful.

Kris, when I first came across your story, I knew you would inspire so many people, but what I didn’t know was how much you would influence me.

Thank you.

Keep fighting! Keep smiling! Keep being you!

With love,

Dear Kris,
I first heard about your story on CNN. It was a most touching story about your serious illness and your love of travel with your family. My daughter, Lauren was lucky enough to be able to reach you. She wanted to interview you for The Unsealed. You were so gracious with your time. I read your words that you expressed to Lauren. I was amazed by your love for your beautiful wife and sweet son and your resiliency.
When you came on Lauren’s weekly zoom meeting I was so moved by your story. You talked about your serious illness, the chemotherapy treatments you had to endure but also about the love you have felt from your family during your journey. Thru your challenging treatments you were able to bring joy into your life by taking wonderful vacations with your family. You would not let your diagnosis stop you from enjoying life. You were able to tell us about your trips with a smile on your face. Your bravery and strength touched my heart.
Kris, your strength gives me the motivation to stay positive in the light of my own personal challenges. I wish you lots and lots of pain free quality time with your family. May you always travel the world spreading sunshine to all you encounter. As for me, I hope to continue to bask in the light of your positivity for many years to come. Thank you for being the amazing person you are and sharing your uplifting, beaming heart.

Love,
Shelley