Strength. Often associated with physicality.
As human beings, are we not more than our physical bodies?
Do we not have moments of pure emotion that engulf our minds from time to time in this life?
Strength. Often associated with physicality, not limited to it.
Mental chatter- it can get LOUD.
So loud that the body at times fights submission to the mind.
Stopping, preventing, or slowing down the process of what we known serves our greater good.
So, if you ask me what makes me strong? I’ll tell you.
That I show up.
I show up on the days I feel 100%
I show up on the days I don’t feel I have anything to give.
I honor my body always, but I never allow my mental chatter to have the final word.
I allow myself to feel the full spectrum of emotions that comes with being a human being.
There is strength in this.
By doing so, not only am I providing reinforcement to myself, but, in doing so
I am paving the path for others to show up for themselves as well.
And that my friends, is often times the strongest thing I can do- show up and being present.
Show up for you, and for those who can benefit from your light. We are all stars.
Show up on the good days,
Show up on the bad days, and the many in between.
Even when my mind attempts to sway me otherwise…I show up.

I cannot keep standing with you,
waiting with you,
crawling with you,
trying with you,
and dying with you…
while you continue to throw stones at the pillars of my strength,
while you continue to hurl your crumbled burdens deep into my soul,
while you continue to stick your daggers dipped with venom deep into the roots of my spirit.
For it is hard enough for me to pick up your broken pieces,
all the while trying to hold onto my own.
But you see,
you’ve been too busy ripping me apart piece by piece,
you’ve been too busy tearing me apart piece by piece,
you’ve been too busy shredding me apart piece by piece,
you’ve been too busy killing me,
destroying me, diminishing me and my innerpeace,
in order for you
to see what I have unselfishly placed underneath your feeble feet,
just so you could be able to stand high amongst the stars.
So forgive me as I ask of you,
forgive me as I demand of you,
and as a matter of fact,
do not forgive me at all…
as I scream to you,
step down off of my now dreamless dreams,
so they may finally run free and wild…
never to be tamed again.
Step off of my now hopeless hopes,
so they may feel the wonder and beauty of the unseen horizons again.
Step off of my now broken wings,
so they may heal and proudly unfurl and caress the skies again.
Step down off of my sacrifices,
for my brokenness shall no longer be the gifts that you refuse to see.
©️
by t.stokes

To whom it may concern,

It seems I forgot how to let the
prospect of beauty
in its purest,
rawest
form
fall graciously into
my subconscious mind…
Yes, the place where light liquidates,
Where neurons shoot and transmute
To fill dark holes and dusty spaces

I figured I have no one else to blame
but myself
for when it gets too dark.
It is I who got myself into the habit
of naming my shadows
turned familiars keen on
purring gentle lullabies,
soothing my body into the night.

And I’ll admit
I was Tempted to replicate these
grayish hours
So I lay there that morning after,
alone, just like I’ve always been.
Alone with delusions named
tangible fantasies,
what I’ve conjured for myself
in the light of beautiful but misplaced passion.
But in your absence,
I delegate my time a bit more wisely
and decided to use it for
something different entirely.

Given my quarrels with things
beyond my control,
I’m inclined to relinquish myself
from this pretense of sadness
So yes, I’m here for some unraveling!
And yes, I’ll wrap myself in love-stricken
cosmological acceptance
Struck like Gold once more!
I’ll my skin tough
and viable
Out of necessity,
And I alone will protect myself from
the cold that

solitude
begs,

And though it may be quieter now,
I won’t acknowledge
the paranormal activity
Of my prefrontal cortex-ting
Me messages
From Sad ghosts
Keen on drawing on you
in with their version of
loneliness.

No, I won’t give in
Instead, I’ll open the curtains,
let the light back in.
I’ll count the days till Equinox returns
And I’m blessed again with summer’s infinite rays

And
All that’s left is to wonder is
“Who I can blame when
the darkness finally returns?”

Until next time.

Do you ever wonder if the way you look
was a mistake?

Do you think it’s just more of a problem

for you? Why?

Is it because you think that most

look better than you?

Or perhaps they are in a more perfect

way than you feel you are?

What is the perfect look?

Who said so?

Who set the rules, to say who

looks better than the other?

Anyone can be pretty, beautiful,

no matter who they are

or how they look.

Beautiful is having beauty,

it was never said,

what kind of beauty.

You make your own beauty!

Pretty is said to be pleasingly attractive,

An act of pleasure.

Anyone can be pleasurable

and create enjoyment,

That defines beauty and pretty,

And it is within.

Sure, you can look good and attractive

on the outside,

But to be beautiful all over,

You must also be beautiful on the inside.

It is always said that,

Beauty is only skin deep.

No matter what the world may throw at you or

your mishaps, or disabilities,

You are unique,

and your uniqueness is what makes

you stand out from everyone else.

We cannot all look alike,

because if we did,

How would you be able to distinguish

your differences from anyone else.

We were all made different

for many reasons,

but it is what we do with our differences,

that makes us even more beautiful.

Just as there are different seasons,

There is day and then there’s night.

There are many different animals

of this world,

Many beautiful and different flowers

and trees of all kinds.

Everything and everyone from the beginning

was to be different,

that was the plan.

So, when you happen to see someone

That seem to be staring at you,

Because you may look a little

different to what they’re use to,

It is OK, your difference is out in the open,

they could be hiding theirs.

Keep your head up, be strong and proud,

and keep saying to yourself,

I am different, I am unique,

I am beautiful,

and if you want to deal with me,

then you must take me as I am,

I too came into this world,

loved as a child of God,

Just like you.

So, do not whine or whimper

about the way you look,

Accept the way it is, and have confidence

in just the way you are,

Believe and know

that the way you were formed

and the way you look

was never a mistake.

You were made to be you,

Not him, not her,

not me, not them, no one else,

But You!

I know you may feel weak at times, but in those moments I want you to remember what makes you strong. It’s your ability to create beauty out of pain. To find wisdom in the aches. And fill the empty spaces of my broken heart with love. What makes you strong is the way you allow yourself to fall apart and break. What makes you strong is the way you put those broken pieces back together like a heart shaped mosaic. This is also what makes you beautiful. Your ability to see the beauty in everything, and share that beauty with those open to receiving.

Like when your home was falling apart and toxicity filled the walls. You made sure that your little sister was still happy. You did what you could to show her the beauties of this life regardless of what was going on around you, which required you yourself to see the beauty in the little things and share that with her. You protected and guarded her with love. Or like the time you were struggling financially yet you still found ways to enjoy life and help her do the same with what we had, and when we lost our home though it was tough, you didn’t give up on life. You still knew that there’s more out there, you still found gratitude for the little things, though you didn’t have much you focused on what you did have and found beauty in the little moments. Like the walks in the park, or our late night bike rides, finding beauty in the warmth of the sun and the twinkles of the stars, finding gratitude for the freedom you felt each time you got on that bike and had the opportunity to go wherever you desired. You remained grateful for each breath you took,  each meal you ate and each person that helped you in any way. You see, your grateful, kind, loving heart & vulnerability is a strength not a weakness. It’s much more daunting to take off the masks, put down the walls, and let your heart love freely. 

Vulnerability is your strength because it gives people something they could potentially use against you. It gives people the opportunity judge and ridicule you for your true feelings and beliefs. 

It’s also allows you the opportunity to connect with others heart to heart. To honor yourself by honoring your truth. 

You also, aren’t afraid to look deep. To acknowledge a feeling as it arises and follow it down to its root, even if it’s one that’s painful, you still do your best to sit with that pain and learn its story. The way you dive deep into the dark seas of the unknown is courageous. Not knowing what lies beneath the surface you take that risk of getting hurt by what you come across when you dive in past the uncertainty. That requires a bravery not everyone has. Though at times you may fall subject to the distractions and forms of suppression towards unpleasant experiences and feelings. You always come around and take a deeper look at them when you regain your consciousness. You are strong because you do your best to honor your feelings. You are strong because you wear your heart on your sleeve. You have the heart to get through anything and find the deeper meaning to it all. You have an undeniable strength, so whenever you feel weak, defeated or depleted, remember this. Feel into your heart, soft and loving yet strong and powerful. You are stronger than you give yourself credit for. So read this as many times as you need, until it’s ingrained in your brain that you are as strong, willful and powerful as can be. 

Love,