Blessed Birthday to the women who has turned tragedy into triumph, compassion into community, and passions into realities, for herself and so many others!

Truly thank you for bringing so many people and opportunities together.

May your dreams keep unfolding; and keep coming true in the most magical and optimal of ways!

With Love and Appreciation…

I remember years ago when I visited an art gallery for extra credit. I saw a door with a note telling me to take off my shoes after I enter and before I proceed down the dark passageway. It also told me to do whatever felt natural. I followed the light to an enclosed space with dirt and leaves all over the floor. A swing was hanging from the ceiling in front of a projection of a girl swinging in and out of the darkness. At first, I hesitated and just watched the girl dip in and out of existence. Finally, I gave in and sat on the swing. My bare feet brushed against the leaves and dirt as I worked up some momentum. As I swung back and forth, childhood memories swung back into my brain. I saw myself swinging in my neighbor’s backyard because I didn’t have my own swing set. I’d try to touch the sky with my toes. That little girl didn’t have a care in the world.

May you always find the time to swing your cares away, Lauren. Happy Day of Birth!

Dear Lauren,

Happy Birthday!!

Today is YOUR day to receive gifts; I hope these letters are ones that you can open at any present moment, and feel LOVED AND APPRECIATED!

With that being said, and I say this with NO EXAGGERATION, THE UNSEALED IS, and will ALWAYS BE, one of the BEST PRESENTS EVER given to ME (even if I purchased it myself)🤣

As you probably know, words, phrases, etc, mean the world to me!

The IMPACT that this phrase:

“TURN YOUR SECRETS INTO SUPERPOWERS – Lauren Brill has on me is one that is on top of the standings for me!

Through YOUR STORY AND the creation of THE UNSEALED, YOU HAVE taught me not only to talk with pride about my difference to literary WALK with PRIDE, and do NOT let ANYONE step on your toes, PREVENTING you to go after your dreams and GOALS!

Much ❤️

Jake

Dear Lauren,
I heard you had a birthday coming up real soon. I’m so glad I got the message so I could wish you a very happy birthday! I hope you get to enjoy every hour, every minute, and every second of it. I also hope you eat lots of apple pie– or the foods you want to eat on your special day. Happy Birthday, Lauren (L)! May you have a billion more birthdays in the future!

Sincerely,

Sunset comes in muted hues

Orange fire and baby blues

Seaside skies, so vast in views

Birds pass lovers, two by twos

The day erased to bygone news

Sunlight fades to starry muse

Gentle flames from bonfires fuse

Bring restful bliss from daytime’s ruse

From sunrise lies to nighttime truths

Our life resets when dawn renews

Dear Unsealers,

Today I held the hand of a dying friend. We looked into each other’s eyes and I said the only thing I could say at that moment…”I love you”. Too weak to speak, he closed his eyes, puckered his tired lips, and blew me a kiss. I caught it and will carry it with me for the rest of my life.

Loving yourself is not easy
Thinking about it makes me dizzy.
My head spirals like the wind
I think about what could have been
Would my love for myself be different if I had not let society’s opinion take me on this tailspin?
I wish I were a dog
Not remembering their last internal sin.
Giving myself love should not be difficult
But my happiness does not come from within!
Relying on others for my happiness will never allow me to feel that “win”
All it does is cause me to throw my accomplishments into the trash bin
However, it’s never too late to recycle
Recognizing where I have been.
Self-love is hard
But life is like a sport
Always giving you a chance to get that comeback win
Before I throw my accomplishments in the bin
Not remembering where I have been
I certainly will remember this poem and its satisfaction.
I love myself because I know I can win!

You’re Confident
You’re Beautiful
You’re Loving
You’re Kind
This beautiful heart that has developed
To care about individuals as much as you do
The confidence you truly found in you
I’m proud and love the woman I’ve become
It took me a long time to get here
You’re a queen
You’re a goddess
You are it
No one can take this away from you
You made it Vision
You love you
You don’t doubt yourself anymore
You believe in you
I love who you have grown into
A true Vision of Love

My body,
What do you think of when I say that phrase ?

Do you cringe in disgust or feel a deep praise?

Whichever side you find yourself on the line..
let me tell you about mine, and how an injury to my spine..

Completely changed the way that I lived life,
I’m grateful to be a father, because my surgeons weren’t sure if I could give life,

Even though it’s uncomfortable I’m thankful for this steel wear,
because the alternative, was being 23 in a wheelchair,

This shit got on my nerves,
especially after finding out that I had nerve damage,
I wasn’t disabled but definitely at a disadvantage.

I had to change my vantage point, and be thankful that my joints and tendons and bones-
overcame their adversity to reclaim my home.

My body.

the only place I know I get to live in,

I need to start honoring it and begin to forgive it.
There’s things I deal with but maybe you’re different,

Maybe you can’t help that you have a genetic diagnosis,
my heart shatters for every woman with endometriosis.

Maybe you have anxiety and depression,
maybe you carry an epipen and dread the day you need to press it.

Or maybe you suffer from Disphormia, or anorexia,

Or adhd, austism, dyslexia

But then again
Maybe you’ve never felt sexier,
Do your eyes turn to stone when you pass by a mirror,
But please open them and to see yourself clearer.

Seek out , don’t turn the other cheek baby let your cheeks out!
Let your freak out,

Speak out, no! speak up
to your body and give it praises,
cuz even if you despise it, each day it still raises..

you… out of your bed.

So , get of your head if you can, because just like you, the rest of us are doing the best we can.

But i get it, not feeling in love with yourself.

Man I really use to be in incredible shape,
Then I got injured and really struggled with my weight,
I would starve my self and would hate what I ate ,
I could feel judging eyes removing things from my plate.

But now I’ve accepted that I no longer need to be that athlete, my varsity days are over, I’m not going to the track meet,

I don’t need to complete great athletic feats anymore,
just want to play with and pick up my son,

I need to be thankful for what my body can do right now, rather than miss out on what it’s already done,

Why are we so concerned with the way we look rather than the way we feel,
we put our bodies through so much pain and never allow them to heal.

Also,
Let me just shout out to all the mothers!
Because you should love your body more than all the others,

So what ? you may have stretch marks, those battle scars makes you look more womanly,
you are everything that a man couldn’t be !

For you did the most physically demanding thing there is and gave birth.
A woman’s body is the most powerful thing on earth!

Your body has gone through a lot it’s changed I understand, but please, don’t hate your body for what it can’t do, and love it for what it can.

*This summer my friend challenged me to write something based off of paint color names. I did it once and liked the result, so I had to do it again. I had my mom choose 5 different paint color swatches at a hardware store and then wrote this. While some details in this letter have been changed (to fit the prompt) I believe this does encapsulate the beautiful spirit of my deceased godmother so I dedicate this to her.
____________________________________________________________________________
I miss you

I miss the way you used to romanticize life

And filled it with special moments

What a blessing it was to watch you relishing in every moment you were here.

With hospitality you would set out fancy china, brew coffee and fill a carafe with heavy cream just for me

The way you would belly laugh when we got caught in a downpour and arrived home sopping wet.

The few sacred moments we spent together in the morning where you would put my hair in a ponytail and smile warmly at me.

The way you would kiss me on the forehead and your cloudberry clad lips would imprint themselves there as a reminder of the deep love you had for me.

The way you would strategically place the tinsel on the Christmas tree so that it would glimmer in the darkness.

Your enthusiasm for life was what made you so beautiful.

And it is a piece of you that shines in the mosaic of pieces that make up me.

One day I will have my own goddaughter and I hope my wonder and enthusiasm for life

Will shine as deeply in her as yours does in me.

With Love,

Oh-three-thirty
the “am” is implied
it can be considered (in military speak)
as zero-dark-thirty
either way, wakefulness is present
outside the sleeping bag cover in camp.

Yeah, still dark outside
my hound and I go out
and the in the darkness
all one has to do is look
up. There is the splendor
of the night sky, clear, starry, unobscured.

Funny how neither of us even thought
about the night critters that may be about
he relying on my presence for safety
my reliance on him for his superior night vision
and sense of smell to warn.

What pictures are there painted in the dark
with steadying brush in hand, trying not to drip
dusky colors off the palette?

Looking up, at the show of night sky
there is no admission, save wakefulness
the theater is quiet, as if in anticipation
of the drawing back that thick purple curtain
still no noises, the dark is silent.

My eyes only see the the vision of the stars
that I am native to see
over the treetops to the left
are such bright pinpoints
close together enough to be a cluster, perhaps
one must be a planet, intense light from there
I shall have to find out which
still I realize that the visions
from the Webb space telescope
are far more lustrous, clearer.

Returning to the tent
the hot coffee is waiting
mist curling up off the coffeepot spout
like some close up nebulae in the cool morn.

I am full of wonder
not sleep, that was a thing of an hour ago

awaiting the sunrise,
and its chase of the darkness into the distant west.

Poem copyrighted 2023, Ray Whitaker

Dear, Unsealers:

Welcome to the month of December!

After the marathon that 2023 has been, we’ve reached the last mile. The finish line is in sight.

The first day of December is a very special day, as it’s my sister and I’s birthday.

38 years.

I’ve already been in tears twice today and I’m sure it’ll happen a few more times before this day ends thinking about it.

As my sister and I weren’t supposed to survive being born prematurely. My parents didn’t expect us to live but we did. And through all of the challenges that life has brought us, we’ve thrived.

If not for my sister, I wouldn’t love traveling, live music and theater. She’s been the source of strength and resilience that I look up to every day. Most importantly, she’s the first person to believe that I’m capable of a lot more than my cerebral palsy lets on.

My sister is my twin, my other half, my best friend and my hero.

I was in awe of the whimsies and romance.
I yearned for my art to comfort and soothe;
For my art to hold the listener’s hearthurt the way my hearthurt was held,
For my art to share imagery with songs of love,
To create beauty in death as he created it.

I wanted to be Hozier, but I have to be Poe, first.

I have to walk through my Inferno to reach such actualization.
My shadow still screams. Still cries.
Pieces of my younger self scattered in nine circles.

I have to talk to her and make peace with her.
I have to parent her.
I have to hold her.
I have to become one with her once more.

I will blood, guts, and gore my way through,
Just as the horrors led my way in.
The girl that wants to scream will scream and
Embrace the gross and the weird and the upset.

I will not become my own betrayer, no. So,
I am no longer my own betrayer, mine own Nth circle.
Treachery at mine own hands, no more.