Letter To My Future Self Fr

Who are? I’ll tell you ALL you need know.
I Am presently living your life right now.
I am, stabilizing standards for our future success.
The choices I make today effects tomorrow. The present, past and future coexist all in one universe at different times though.

(2023 version) of us;
I am Someone who aspire to inspire others, through my testimony.

I am striving to reach optimal potential.
I am an active listener.
I search for beauty within every single day and (person). I believe beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

I think more than I say; I don’t care about others opinions of me. Facts are proven.
I truly believe nothing is impossible I’m(possible); through knowledge, reverse psychology.

I think positive; I believe when others doubt.
Who am I to judge ? I learned Respect is earned not given. Life is about about worth and purpose. I often reflect; ask myself is it worth it? and does my intentions (actions) meet my expectations (purpose?)

Its essential I learn my lesson,
If not, history repeats itself.
If my intentions are not pure: I self reflect, repent and fix it. I must stay pure. Karma is real.

I am giving because my purpose is helping , healing and mission(ary).
Ultimately I want to spread love, peace and happiness. And start a non profit for foster children.

I am understanding but misunderstood.
Forgive for, they don’t know who I am.
I am trying to find Balance and Master Life.
I am setting myself up for (our) future success.

I remind myself to not dwell on situations I can’t change. Instead I search for alternatives.

I’m working to provide for myself, family orphans and the less fortunate slaves.
I must ensure my prophecy transpires, by any means necessary.

Its mandatory that I Sacrifice now (presently) for my future self to thrive, (for humanity) future prize.

Return Response, From: Future-Fiction Fantasy (Dreams)Come True, FANATIC!

Dear Present Self,

Heads up! Thanks for the head start, from your future-self. Now you living lavish never forget where you came from. Remember home is where the heart is.

Remind yourself daily, you have already won. You have absolutely nothing to worry about warrior. Your journey has already been mapped out.

Time is of the essence; some(times) patience is a necessity. Know the difference between the two; time wasted.

When you feel like giving up, remember your purpose. That should motivate you to keep going and refocus on the outcome (better days to come).

You need to open up more, don’t be scared to express yourself. Your voice is your sword(weapon) to success.
You give but can’t accept love. Explore and Embrace your, Love Language. It’s detrimental to reciprocate (give-take) relationships. Accept love not only because you deserve it, You are also worthy to be loved.
You are honorable because you worked for everything you have; you earned it
Your are strong and brave. When you feel weak, remind yourself how far you came; from nothing. You are great because you are grateful.

Remember It’s okay if you fail; When you fall get back up. If you can say you tried your best and gave it all you had, realistically you could never fail. You are blessed beyond measures.

If you learn from the mistakes you make then; you earn mercy, grace and forgiveness.
You are guaranteed to reach optimal potential by accepting failure and gaining knowledge which is the key to power.
Don’t be so hard on yourself all the time. You deserve a break, you have already won.

You will be(come), past tense.
The first millionaire in your family.
Always trust intuition and only be lead by the spirit. in a million years never give up because you have already won.

You are the creator of your world.
Your mind is the most powerful tool you obtain. Be wise and think positive. Always believe wholeheartedly. Focus on your purpose.
Through pure performance, passion, and perseverance you will reach your destination; which is destiny.

The legacy you leave will be for generations to come.
You can celebrate now because your future is bright, you already won. Enjoy your journey. Abundance waits you. Just keep going.

You are righteous and will be recognized.
Anything you seek, you will find(willingly)
Everything you want, you will obtain
From past to future tense (spontaneously)

Congratulations Jessica Oliver,
Mission accomplished. Your purpose will be fulfilled and (testimony) heard from generations for ages all around the world

You earned and are worthy of honor.
you will obtain, more than you yearn for.
For Grace and being Grateful. You are destined for greatness. Thank you for paving the path for success for us.

Love your present and future self

Jessica Oliver

You’re in excruciating pain, scared and confused. That’s due to the multiple skull fractures. You will always be reminded of what happened because of the lifetime of pain you will endure, but you heal. Better than anyone could ever have imagined. Despite the amnesia, God will allow you to keep the memories you have made with your children. For this, you are grateful. Unfortunately, memories of that night are also something that stays with you, but you see it as a starting point from how far you’ve come. This is also something to be grateful for.

After he fractures your jaw, he uses pliers in an attempt to remove several of your teeth. He wanted a souvenir. God is with you when this happens, therefore he ends up with nothing. The dentist is the only one who collects a tooth several months later. It’s necessary for the healing process. In time, you will find yourself able to enjoy dinner with your children again.

You regain your hearing even though he ruptures both of your eardrums. God will allow you to hear your Autistic son speak his first words eventually. That’s when you’ll realize your life will be filled with miracles that have nothing to do with that night. This is when you stop counting your blessings and accept them in abundance.

It will take over a year for you to ovulate the way a woman should. That’s okay. Eventually the pain you experience due to the trauma inflicted to your uterus lessens. You’ll only be reminded of it when menstruating. At times, you’ll think about the little girl that you always wanted but push those thoughts aside when you remember how lucky you are to have two sons already.

It was rape. There is nothing that you could have done differently to change the events that unfolded that night. Be kinder to yourself. It will take years, but the nightmares will subside. You will no longer find yourself drenched in tears, awoken by your own screams. God will allow you to dream again.

You survive. Your mind, body and soul will be forever altered, but that’s okay. You will struggle with relearning everything you have forgotten, because of this, you will evolve into a different person. A better person. One who displays strength and compassion in all that she does. You will piece yourself back together and the broken in you will be your beauty.

God will allow you to heal. He will assure you that this happens through the love and bond you have with your children. They will repair you mentally, physically, spiritually and emotionally. Remember to thank God for this in your prayers daily and thank your children by reciprocating the love they use to save you with. Love is all they have to give you; that’s all you will ever need to make it through another day.

I don’t know why she’s in my arms now.
She’s just as rigid as she ever was.
Not even blood pools out her private body,
She thought she’d save it for her wedding day.
The rocking chair creaks like a mourning dove,
The mourning doves are gone.

I wanted to write you before she was gone,
But the shotgun smokes black, but I’ve done it now,
but I’ve done it raw. Above, a mourning dove
Groans like a dying girl on her wedding day.
The bullet hole is just as gaudy as it ever was.
The rocking chair thrusts in and out like a body.

Do we ever get the nerve to look at our own body?
If the mourning doves are gone,
Should we mourn for ourselves? Will our day
Of reckoning smoke black like a gun? Now,
she’s in the garden, just as soft as she ever was.
Now, the lillies are screaming like a mourning dove.

Will Jesus, Son of God, mourn us like a dove?
If a fallen angel comes, will they touch our dirty body?
Is it just as raw as it ever was?
The morning doves are gone,
I wonder where they’ll fly now;
There’ll be no blood for them, or a wedding day.

I never loved the girl that we buried. The black day
sinks into my lap like our gun. A mourning dove
Murmurs our name to Jesus. We’ve done it now,
Will we do it again? There’s no such thing as a private body
anymore. I rock in the rocking chair. I’ve gone
back and forth like I never was

Rigid. I’ve gone back and forth like I never was
Soft. When you read this, will you remember this day
Like a wound or a moan? Have you ever gone
Back to her body? Do you have the nerve to look at a dove?
Did the Lily’s in the garden grow from her body?
I hope you’re chuckling in the rocking chair now.

She’s just as rigid as she ever was.
The rocking chair creaks like a mourning dove

We could have bled on our wedding day,
But of what use is a private body?

The mourning doves are gone
My shotgun’s hot, I’ve done it now.

Hey you,

I know.

You are seen.
I see you.

Your bloom is just around the corner so don’t lose your footing now. The load is much lighter here, after learning to get comfortable with being uncomfortable. Elevation is right there. I see you spending days cuddled up in bed with God’s Word because you think the entire world doesn’t understand depth. Plus, speaking kindly to yourself just doesn’t feel natural. I see the mirrors decorating every wall just to reaffirm yourself: ‘I am well spoken and articulate’. From where I sit, Indian style and lifted of course, people do understand you when you speak; the depth, the substance. Our words penetrate souls and who is for you will align with you. And yes, it is ok to leave a little room for delusion in your life because reality is heavy and the truth is, everything seemingly holding you back is all an illusion anyway. Never mind the diagnosis and crises you believe could never get better.

Time.

All in God’s timing, for you know ‘His ways are not our ways; His thoughts are not our thoughts.’ Yet and still, you are there to give valuable and necessary think pieces. Here, you’ve finally made it to be remembered as a lighthouse; you store light, you pour light. You are a pathway to peace above all else. Your gift guides life directly to and from the Creator so don’t doubt yourself. For now, focus on being present in every task without strategizing the outcome.

Breathe.

Your feet have already been blessed in every step you take. The ground you walk on is sacred. You can rest.

Rest.

Send kudos to the soldiers in their bullet proof vests; ours became too heavy to suit up in every single day so on this new land, I decided to take it off and bury it. Now, I protect myself by going where I’m celebrated and resting where peace greets me; speaking in spaces where my language flows freely and is reciprocated with flowers while I’m breathing. You are doing everything we first learn to do alone on our own – alone, so yes, you will know what beauty feels like when you invite someone along. Our wildest discovery in healing was that the process becomes a little easier once you learn to hurt. Not avoid it. Not fight it. And it is ok to count your blessings but mourning the pain and the scars of the lessons holds real weight too. So smile, Angelface, through the highs and the lows.

Trust.

Keep your balance and embrace the moments of weakness too. For when you are weak, He can be strong for you.

Be.

You’re free. Survival mode taught you well but now softness is your robe. Adjust your crown and recognize your throne. Predestined for peace, is what you are – what you’ve been. The prayer hadn’t even existed on your lips until the plan to answer it said ‘begin”.

Sow.

Accept with worthiness what you deserve to reap, through and through. Most of all, don’t forget to remember what God says is true about You.

I’ll wait for you.

Love,
The Future You