Same principle as-Dear John.
You are not leaving, So-I will!
You tell me so much-untrue,
So I am divorcing and leaving you!
Not married to you, nor addictions few-
You won’t go, won’t budge, So-I will move!

Though I have no idea how,
My learns of Jesus-He makes free,
Giving me rest… And He will best teach me,
How to defeat your homemade nest of Glee.
The one you built for years on end,
A false comfort-false feeling friend…
You was/is/am not who I thought-
You’re lying surviving, dread to me brought.

You can have me no more!
No reason any longer to fear myself,
For I don’t control me anymore -Jesus does!
Under His umbrella of Grace-
I’m found and completely safe!

Fear… whence comest thou?
I know not-though we are parting ways…
No evil to fear for the rest of my days!
No lies beside me-Jesus keeps them away,
Though around the bend you may sit at Bay-
I see thee far off and turn to you deaf ear,
You seek but don’t find… Your voice I cannot hear!

No words to you I have of my own,
Because Jesus true-builds me a new home!
You cannot have my kids, you cannot have my wife-
For you are dead my old cheating friend…
Because Jesus has ended your life!

I’ve already known fear,
Now it’s time to know God-
And fear cannot win because…

2 Timothy 1:7
For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, of love, and of a sound of mind.

… This promised fact I trust and love!!!

Meeting you was like winning the lottery. It was the best decision I ever made to become your girlfriend. Thank you for loving me for who I am and not wanting to change a thing about me. Thank you for helping me love myself more each day. You consistently go above and beyond, and you have been nothing but a blessing in my life. I’m grateful for you every day, in every moment.

Your touch, your scent, your smile, your eyes—everything about you is perfect to me. You are the most selfless, unique, outgoing, and loving person I have ever known. I remember the first time we met and our first conversation. I recall the moment you thought I was cute and when you asked me to be your girlfriend. It was in Central Park, and it was raining. We stood under a bridge, soaked, and you held me in your arms, asking, “Will you be my girlfriend?” It felt like a scene from a romcom.

I remember our first kiss and all the special moments we’ve shared. We have now been together for 992 days, and we continue to promise each other forever. With you, it truly feels like eternity. I remember when I first fell in love with you; it wasn’t love at first sight. I fell in love when you stayed with me at the hospital for ten hours. That’s when I knew you were different from other men I’ve known, and I love you for that.

People say that when you are truly with the right person, you start to look alike. That’s what I see in us. I love you, handsome, forever and always.

Movable joints, as if freshly greased.
My elbows and knees will move easily while I watch Sunsets in the East.
Silver shafts peak through honey brown, as if touched by a wand.
My hair will be healthy and shine even if I once was blonde.
Adrenaline shifts down to lower gears, even grinding to a halt.
My anxiety will melt away as I drink a strawberry malt.
Numbers steadily climb as they reach heights never dreamt of.
My bank account balance will stay full like the belly of a content dove.
Floating high into the clouds, light as a feather.
My heart will pitter patter as I read countless love letters.
Gravity bends light, and one can see for miles from atop the tallest mountain.
My pride will exude for my child from every cell as if it’s a perpetual fountain.
Spears, bullets and missiles soar through the atmosphere yet are deflected.
My armor will hold steady, and my inner peace will be protected.
Wood, stone, and concrete form a cocoon around a soft and warm oasis.
My heart will be content, as I learn to be satisfied with life’s basics.
Bombs diffuse as ancient frequencies encompass all that exists.
My ultimate wish comes true as I learn to surrender to life and simply no longer resist

When I ask the most intricate parts of myself what is the goal, they respond in the most sweetest and saddest way. “Lauryn you can either expand, be complacent or smaller”. Will this year be better the same or worse? I would most certainly love for the goal to be me expanding so wide there’s only room for the things that will benefit me. Expanding the uncomfortableness so much it pops into extraordinary memories that’s so vivid I can truly see. Doing things only the childhood Lauryn imagined. Don’t die Lauryn stay alive. That has always been the ultimate goal. When the pain is overwhelming me with doubts and fears of abandonment, confusion, control your emotions so they don’t swallow you whole. Let that be the goal. Being certain in my uncertainties has allowed me to envision the worst and best at times. Thinking 100 miles per hour, but moving so damn slow. Lauryn go. Don’t slip into the what if category. Dont get caught and arrested by the imposter police because it’s hard to get out and simply be free and believe you can do things. I must let myself know to go. Let that be my ultimate goal.

71% Style Score

2025, this is my goal
Stay 10 toes down and not fold

What’s my goal
Not to let life’s challenges take control

I won’t be shaken
I’m moving forward, don’t be mistaken

I’ve got my own path
Launching my biz-you do the math

Thirty-two years in this game
Now it’s time to shift the frame

No more listening to that corporate voice
I’m gonna make my own choice

God gave me the sign, now’s is the time
No more sitting back, it’s time to climb

I’m walking by Faith and not by sight
My Trust in God will guide me right

No time to second guess, I’m all about delivering success

I’ve planted the seeds, now I’m waiting on the leads

This is my passion
I’m your Travel Advocate

Taking care all your travel needs
Exceptional customer service is guaranteed

I’m not anxious or greedy
My motto is “Making Travel Easy”

You want to know my goal for 2025
Watch me soar and see my vibe

My Goal don’t you know
I’m living in the overflow

I have seven goals for 2025. 

First, I aim to graduate soon and earn my creative writing degree. Second, I want to finish my book titled “The End Begins Now” and self-publish it. My third goal, which might seem a bit crazy but is also exciting, is to obtain my motorcycle (M1) license and get myself a Harley-Davidson, since I’m really passionate about motorcycles. 

For my fourth goal, I hope to move in with my partner. I envision our place being as spacious as possible, filled with sunlight, and having a balcony where I can plant my favorite flowers and enjoy nature’s beauty. 

My fifth goal for the year is to secure a well-paying job that provides enough stability for me to achieve everything I want and need. Sixth, I watoain healthy relationships with my partner and friends, as I’ve experienced the challenges of dishonesty and a lack of loyalty in past relationships, especially with friends I once considered like sisters.

Finally, my last goal is to maintain my peace and showcase the best version of myself—not just a version that others expect. I believe that in this world, it’s crucial to present your true, authentic self in order to succeed and make a name for yourself. I want to achieve this through my writing, helping others who are afraid to express their true selves. I aspire to be someone others can relate to, where they won’t feel judged. 

These are my goals for 2025, and I hope to succeed in achieving them.

Dear Unsealed,

I was going to make a long list,
Of at least
Ten goals to conquer
On my bucket list
Of proper
Stuff to do,
Write,
Create music as you
Write poetry,
Stories of life
The other goal
That worries my soul
To be so bold
As I hear at 75, I might lose
My social security and healthcare.
Beware
I was told today
So bold
By a friend
I would have to get a real job,
My art, my songs, my writing does not pay,
Here what I say
She said,
I looked at her and walked into my room,
Walk away today,
My goal is to tell anyone
To their face
That said to me give up your writing and all that,
Get a real job!
I texted her I do not need to be told
So bold,
What to do,
She made me blue,
Rolled off my shoulder,
As I am bolder
At 75,
Glad to be alive.
My one fun goal is to get a tattoo
Of a red rose
Painted on me by my cousin LA,
Prose and praise,
I will be so bold,
As I am old
To take a course in AI,
Maybe get certified,
Then money will flow,
But all the while
My dear child,
I cry out to naysayers,
Think how your words pierce my heart
As I am now making a new creative start.
My goals for 2025 are:
a. Let things naysayers slide off my shoulders.
b. Continue to create art, music, and writing.
c. Research taking course in AI to be certified to work professionally
d. BREATHE!
These are my immediate thoughts about my goals for 2025. There is a possibility that the new government in DC will cut our social security, health care and all entitlements as the billionaires talk destruction of our lives as we know it to create fear in everyone.
BREATHE!

( Here I have written a Short personal story about my fear(s), as i advocate in defense for her( Fears-truth). I go in slight detail describing my reasons for seclusion over the years from the many shadow people Ive encountered, portrayed as your everyday modern people, in a town I secretly call “ The City of Masks”. I share with you a view of my battles ( Fear) living within the inner city at Present day moment. Here I reflect through brief examples of time, as we count down the days walking into 2025. May you riddle through the scenes of my lifes Truth, as her called “FEAR”, journeying as you read and feel with your senses and interpret these words from your inner voice processing the imagery as MY thoughts. I also share befriending the struggle of having Complex PTSD, something ive become adapted to because of the fears.

-Enjoy

“Here she comes, and there she goes. Closing all of doors as she walks away from the many liars that were paid actors in her life”. More than often , they were all a test of time, though the wise say time does not exist. If we were to sleep with our eyes open we wont notice a thing, No different to the sight of our skin as we age, like counting each grain of sand as it falls or the lines of wrinkles that appear everytime we blink. Tell it to the gray hairs ive noticed popping up over the years that i wear with pride and take as a medal of honor for wisdom.

Like a samurai with her sword, a dagger of truth is what I tote. For the many silent battles Ive won solving the once hidden riddles of cold cases that were forced closed by the authors of corruption deemed as model citizens hoisting there cursed badges and smug smiles of cracked glass as they marvel themselves with vanity lying to the world. They found joy and solace in baiting the many people i used to know with dirty money, buying a ghostly departure of silence, it became similar to waking up in your home of an open door like a thief had come and gone in the middle of the night. “There words spoke darkness coveting a rouse of death with fear questioning discussions to the pieces of my life, as if I were a large puzzle they were trying to solve like a mobster stationed in an alley way, waiting to snatch you up while walking home in the dead of night… never to hear from them again”. The fear of opening up to the wrong crowd, or a single person troubled me to not converse anymore wondering who sent them depending on the questions they asked like knowing portions to my past as if they came in scripted, this may seem as an intrigued read though this is indeed pure non fiction.

Just like the time in 2021 when a mentalist and his wife so happened to be parked across the street from my house by King Park that summer. He got out of his car and came in a joking manner to ask me to think of a number , hold it in my mind, then add possibly 10 or 20 to that number for him to guess- which he did three separate times to perform his skill to me as a mind reader though he never openly admitted to being such. I smiled with admiration and inclined that that was a God given gift and should be used as a tool to help people for the good and congratulated him as he departed away from me ( In that moment In my mind I was hoping he read my thoughts of the danger in breaking spiritual law with the intent to bio hack the mind for purposes of psychological warfare) “tisk tisk” what a guy. “You never meet people by coincidence , we all serve a purpose when we cross paths in another’s life, even if its a short greeting when walking past, no one ever forgets the beauty of a simple smile”. Lets not forget about the fear I had when i crossed paths with a shape shifting reptilian who eyes flipped under the street light during a full moon.

This figure was a computer tech , hacker , loud mouth bozo who bragged of his Masonic cult ties with a Middle Eastern background. He called him self a poltergeist ( eye roll) , though every time he came by things would fall off my wall or go missing ,lbvs. There was no fearing there in regards to him, again, Its just the thought that there are people with supernatural gifts that abuse them for darker agendas rather than serving the greater good of humanity. They instead find happiness in toying with the vulnerable creating havoc in their lives all while harvesting not only the victims energy, but there ideas and creations, modeling in another’s skin of divinity. “ They are like sharks who smell blood in the deepest ocean , ready to feed upon the fear of those who are trying to survive a life of terror hoping to purify themselves in the bluest water” but beware the of narks ( The definition of a crooked narcissistic police informant) are just the human form of the Great White Shark, a predator of the meek none the less.

All of my years of living i’ve encountered alot of Agent Smiths . Some dont even deserve the notion of mentioning , it would gratify there ploy to be the murderous villain in my life, though me exposing these truths would set her free,…set Fear free. “She deserves that , to be set free from the bondage of being on constant edge, a warrior woman who deserves more than her flowers but a purple heart for her grit and strength that helped amplify my purpose in the thick of it all. “Fear kept the faith strong ,because when she prayed those cries to the heavens turned my tears of waves into Hurricanes that washed in Gods warmth of mercy for my aching heart, but awakened a wrath from the darkness of Heavens universal fire sent to all of the devils children , who took an oath to be puppets to the harlots grand scheme of a dauntless schism of grief .” Once you learn to surrender, Over night it could blow in the winds of change so bold and loud like that of the ” Tri State Tornado”… metaphorically speaking, “Truth will rain in the light of justice in the most surreal way, as if Salvador Dali painted the outcome himself”. Those who played with a badge and cuffs were the ones now being shackled and forced to face themselves in the room of mirrors that shamed them in gruesome chants heralding JUDGEMENT for all of the innocence the world has lost to the egregious acts covered and sealed by those sworn in the manish mens Chambers of Secret.
A sound of lightening would appear to every crack that would splice in each mirror facet for every scream never heard, that was covered by the hands of a crooked authoritative figure lying under oath. Every dark occult would be exposed for shielding the pain with there book of illusions to set free the earth bound souls of those forgotten as they swayed across the fields in the night hoping for a single thought of remembrance by a loved one still living. Even a mother gone would turn over in her grave by the whispers of those murmuring a plot for premeditated death to her children, she will arise as the reaper herself from below to bring vengeance. Even if mother is long gone, she will find a way to come back to let you in on the truth, cause after all… A mother knows”. Wisdom will appear like visions in a dream, Like smoke signals pillowing above in the sky to alert the Chief.

“ My dreams are like warning signs that herald the truth, because my eyes do not lie” i’ve evaded death many times as proof. The deceivers fear my voice when I speak, that’s why they slandered my character and put poison in my food and drink just so i wouldn’t remember a thing. It was an attempt with hope that id never awaken, with a sane mind remembering the words they said before they left, not knowing i knew exactly what it was when they left a dead crow filled with bugs wrapped with twine thrown on my wicker seating as they attempted to hex me and my childs life. I still live knowing the beings of light reflected that arrow of darkness back to the deranged conjurers whose eyes were filled with envy, congregating in there coven of Stockholm abusers pretending to be pro life and believers of divinity. Manipulators of all kinds have toyed with my mental like clans of Jekyll and Hyde showmen, gaslighting my sanity to only strengthen my awareness to sense when I was being tested by being tempted .

They used dirt and bones casting magic from the graveyard and Jar spells from down yonder, “ From the very same place in the bayou where Katrina once reigned in with the karmic wish of death for debt from conjuring with spirits forbidden to Hells kitchen of haitian shadow men and Jinns never heard of… Though i knew them because we battled numbers of many lifetimes ago”. And because i knew, They feared the voice of my truth. They jumped to the quickness to spread lies and gossip. They wanted to be baneful by musing in the image of a lesser god for power, gluttony and the rest of the deadly sins as a way to antagonize my character of knowing in a group of scared satanist harboring there hatred. The light of truth began to pour in the corners of there dim lit rooms where the skeletons they hid were to much to hide that prevented their closet door from shutting.

Just like Fear, she wouldnt let me stay quiet and stop defending what was right. I proceeded in secret going to court while speaking up for my child regardless of the threats of the judge against her crooked cop of a father who lied and denied an unhealthy amount of times , grooming in an attempt to confuse my daughters fragile mind way before she could reach adolescence . This silent war battling fear became wicked because i chose to speak up thus granting me a gift of a lifetime trinket of complex PTSD. A stored memory bank of the repetitive traumatic events and discussions remain dormant casted in the walls of my mind like a vivid mural that moves with scenes like a play back for an old fashioned movie projector . I will never forget the smells, the gut retching pinch in my abdomen at certain cues , the undertones in there voices, neither the action or inaction when emotional support was neglected because of my courage to point out there immoral nature as sexual deviants and unbothered reactions.

The Fear taught me self respect and gave me the push to walk away after all the facts were gathered .“ The City Of Masks” is what I named it after it became clear that i was standing alone in the storm, seeing that the people I loved either stayed mute or jumped ship to defend perpetrators and liars because of the past they had( Being close like Kin as in blood ties) some just fancied them because they were wearing a badge, not really knowing them for who they really were masking inside. “I was too real to honest and too raw for those living a lie, because me choosing the heal as a victim would reveal to them the very things they ran from or hid from the world or perhaps either did in secret themselves .” Even the term “ I am my brothers keeper” shed light to a sworn secrecy of covering the acts of incest and molestation while scrutinizing the true victims that suffered because they feared saying something.Though Fear consumed me like a pit of darkness once upon a time, she became like a friend who saw trouble coming and redirected me at times as my supporter and protector to evade harm right at the knick of time.
Maybe it was just my strong intuition and the dreams that made me react quicker. These are the things one would deem as obstacles and became like weight packs in training that I began shouldering through in a jungle filled with a hazing fume. Fear isn’t all the way as bad as she was made to look, more like a sergeant who taught you how to withstand pain while wading in the swamps as a trait for tactical awareness in the midst of breathing through a panic attack. “The fear helped me to seek faith , which ultimately led me to the light and became my saving grace while i cocooned myself at home creating art about my past lives and untapped findings of self discover. Even creating some of the best written works of writing about my supernatural experiences that brought me to life as i was forced to really go within regardless of it being clear the outside world was crashing with fire and caving in ”.

It all depends on how you look at it, overcoming the shadow side of fear is me writing about my harbored struggles of having Complex PTSD – Something that accumulated due to the repetitive abuse of covert antagonism from the over bearing figures that were staggered and stationed in my life. As well as the psychological torture I endured from manipulative authoritative figures as we strategized a swirl of a quiet war with divination abusers who celebrated at performing a wicked game of psychosis tampering into the dark arts. “There is so much more I could express but it would turn this writing into a broader length of an added 4 page letter of why Fear became my crutch, thus morphing in a beautiful flower shaped like a bleeding heart”. Me and her both know as weve grown together its getting close for us to depart, it feels so freeing being able to finally talk about these burdens that once held me captive afraid to admit my scars. I’ve become like an Orca whale on the roam with her child , ready to be unleashed into uncharted waters, leaving everything she once knew behind… “ Her Fear turned into her Truth, as her eyes looked up and guided her into the blue following the stars from afar.”

Dear Unsealed,
2024 was and is forever changing directions around the world.
As I step up the ladder to look out at the world,
I slip,
I grip,
The sides of the ladder as it staggers slowly to the ground,
All around
The neighborhoods of America
We shout I care!
I kept my goals of diet, focusing, eating healthy and all the other goals I had proposed processing the exchange from 2023 to 2024. I wrote for The Unsealed and Vocal.
My newest accomplishment was writing and producing 18 songs after signing a contract with #distrokid online. That was not planned. I had music training beginning early in life. I utilize Suno AI, Invideo Ai, LTX studios AI, Sora AI to produce videos with my music to publish on you tube. I create music, words, and beats and all that from my heart and soul to make people happy or to talk about political issues through music. I discovered this is my new adventure.
I am still waiting on commissions from Vocal for this year. I am waiting for my royalties from my music. A goal for another story will be written soon.
2024 was a progressive year of changes, elections, and then the non-progressive election of a backwards society person to suppress women, the elderly, the vulnerable of our society. My answer to all of that malarky’ is I will remain who I am as a creative woman of elder age of 75.
The world watches all.
The world will see as the ball
Drops in Times Square 2024.
As before
We salute 2024,
We crash our drinks to 2025,
We are alive
To strive for rainbows,
Not illusions of unicorns,
But truth, freedom, and to be born
To spread love across the world
Of the good, the bad, the ugly.
As I type on my pc to be a ladybug
Of character of values to flow
Across from 2024 to 2025,
More songs, stories, poems, art
Not farts.
So, I summarize my eccentric rant of 2024
As each year goes forward
My music and contract with #distrokid were my unexpected 2024 goal that came true as I walked the path of the year transformation from dark to light.
So bright,
So very light,
Breathe!

I wanna say thank you to me, my forever love and best friend.
You are a rarity none the less. Though we are a complex species to the beings of this world,
In our dimension we mirror gaze inside the double phantom crystal ball that expands inward as if we are some sort of device like a kaleidoc terrarium .
“Knowing that she who smiles back carries more inner beauty , than a quiet walk through a never ending gallery at mid night”.
with halls of ART that stretch in a curvature of explosive colors that are mystique,
In so many words ,.. I wanna thank me for being unique with a blush tone of mysterious Chic.
Like the luminescent gleam that smolders in the shadows of the nebula that stands stuck in the middle of the universes black hole.
I am – bleeding love at the center point.
Meaning I appreciate my shadows that create rainbows like paint to my depth.
A tidal wave of intellect like an ancient farer at sea who aimlessly pondering over the bow of her boat. And over in the waters, lies her mind scrying in the ocean as if its a vast canvas reflecting a light show.
the sparkles from the night, help connect the stars from down below that reflect from her , like a cosmo of fires from up high as i rearrange the light glow with a seashell, like tic tack toe.
Damn,… I wanna say Thank you for your wild thought of an imagination. A safety net from the cumbersome world that we run from , to disconnect and save face as we escape.
I love that we shelter each other from the noise outside as we create movies on the inside with vivid projectors as we roam the portals of divinity to our sacred sensuality , that only you and I are invited too … “ I wanna say Thank you for being my rescue.”
Like timeless music, Your are the lovers rock i cling to in a storm , you sing to me like Sade when she hums and says these words in that one song, “ I will be your friend Til the end of time, I will be your friend, Im here to make you smile … In the mirror face to face as we Sing with a smile as we lock eyes”.
The words in those songs seem to be more like scriptures of the future from you to me at this present as we tango the timeline of this paradigm.
“ I wanna say thank you my love, for always being by my side”
The God in you speaks to me that keeps me going and living with hopes of seeing your eyes every sunrise.
My Partner for life
“Thank you for teaching me how to love, and how to speak up and protect the self. You showed me my worth when my faith in others were failed”

Yours truly with deep love and admiration ,
Always and forever

~ Your Mirror

Thank you for being true to yourself and not allowing anyone to push you around anymore. I appreciate your courage in being vulnerable again after experiencing hurt from family, friends, and even a toxic significant other. Thank you for choosing yourself in situations that could jeopardize your mental health once more.

Thank you for accepting your flaws and embracing your unique qualities. You have made the little girl inside you proud today because no one else could ever fully understand what you have gone through.

Thank you for loving your inner beauty and not worrying about what others think. I admire how you hold onto your childhood memories while letting go of the pain associated with who you used to be. Thank you for breaking free from your parents’ control over your life and for recognizing that you are not obligated to maintain relationships with people you don’t get along with, especially your brother.

Thank you for following your heart and pursuing your dreams without letting anyone else ruin them. Life is too short not to be thankful for yourself, so always remember to be grateful.