In the darkness of doubt and despair,
I carried the weight of judgment unfair.
Bipolar, depression, schizophrenia’s shadow,
Teachers’ words piercing like a sharp arrow.

“You’ll never be anything, just a lost cause.”
Echoes of doubt, reinforcing flaws.
But deep within, a flame flickered bright,
A spirit unbroken, ready for the fight.

Through the storms of mental strife,
I embraced the challenges of life.
Rising above the cruel words spoken,
I refused to let my spirit be broken.

Amidst the chaos, I found my way,
Striving for a brighter day.
First in my family to reach that height,
A beacon of hope, shining so bright.

I walked the path less traveled by,
Defying odds reaching for the sky.
People’s eyes now filled with surprise,
Seeing the truth behind their lies.

I confess the pain that once held me down,
The weight of expectations, a heavy crown.
But in spite of it all, I stand tall and strong,
A testament to resilience all along.

So here I am, a survivor, a warrior true,
Proving wrong every naysayer’s view.
I am not defined by my past’s dark spree,
I am here, I am free, I am me.

Dear Unsealers,

The 8th of March is International Women’s Day.

I wanted to show a measure of gratitude to the women in my life, from my mom, sister and all of my female friends and acquaintances. Today, tomorrow and all of the days that follow.

It’s with that idea in mind, that the following poem comes from…

On International Women’s Day
A shout out to all the women

From all walks, ages of life
And all corners of the globe

Showing backbone that keeps the world together
Through shows of tenacity, strength, kindness and love

I ought to know this for sure
For their courage and ambition
Coming to the forefront time and again

I look up to the women in my life
My mother, my sister and oh so many more
As their encouragement makes me who I am

We celebrate them and admire them
Every day of the year, not just today

I am writing to remind you that the way you love yourself—is also the way you allow others to love you as well. I am writing to remind you that loving yourself means more than simply loving the parts that you are most proud of.

It is peeling back the perceptions, misconceptions, and projections. It is loving past, present and future you; all the varied iterations beloved anew. It is gazing longingly within. It is lifting the veil—accepting and releasing all you’ve been: the monsters and angels both.

It is forgiveness for not always being the very best version of yourself, allowing even you to make mistakes. It is making peace with yourself so you can be at peace with other people. It is pure inner G/energy.

It is preemptively setting the stage each day—via your preferred method of attaining your most aware state—so that your focus is maintained on fun and play—simply because you deserve to feel good. Allowing each day to be dimpled with love and laughter as each could.

It is being capable of keeping commitments to yourself. Where self compassion and self actualization meet, love is an endless well. The more that you pour into yourself, the more you become a living self love spell. Such great love can only expand to reach everyone else.

I am writing to remember that the way I love myself is also the way I allow others to love me as well. I am writing to remember that loving myself means more than simply loving the parts that I am most proud of.

I am writing to remember.

I am most beautiful
When I am myself
In the most
Raw and vulnerable form
After I’ve danced
And my hair sticks
To my sweaty forehead
After I’ve laughed so hard
My smile can’t help but linger
Once I am done crying
Alone on my dirty floors
And I look into the mirror
Staring into my puffy eyes
I think,
I love her
She dances
She laughs
She feels feelings so loudly
And she loves even louder
She is most beautiful
In these moments

Dear Unsealers,

It’s the first day of March.

A new month has just begun. 31 new days to make them as we wish.

As the new month begins, it’s a season of transitition. From adding more daylight to the days, to the first traces of spring appearing.

With the new month beginning, it’s my custom to welcome it in verse.

A moment to welcome the month of March
31 new days have just arrived

A month that’s full of transitions
From the clocks switching ahead an hour
To winter’s last hurrah, as spring knocks on the door

To celebrate patron saints, Lá fhéile Pádraig & Dydd Gwyl Dewi
And painting the town green, in honor of Cerebral Palsy Awareness Month

As the UEFA Euros finalize their 24, MLS & the NWSL begin and MLB’s just a first pitch away
The Madness of 68 college basketball teams reigns

The first quarter of 2024, its ending coming near
There is nothing to fear and everything to embrace

Black is the new poetry my dear
Authored by our ancestors so I could have a voice that is heard beyond the volume of fear
The ink has always been dark so see with your ears
Black is the new love, now let your heart hear
The strength born from blood, sweat, and tears
That grew into a sunrise of a smile, my dear
My darling I keep your Melanin near
And your beauty adds depth to my mirror
The reflection tells me weapons are forming but they will stay in the rear
Because,
My black is the sunset to my depressed anxiety to steer
A blooming future in the right direction never to veer
Toward negativity, my dear
My black is the armor that never cracked, from the roots of scars and ignored facts
My black has always got my back so even if my eyes close you will still see this color, add a period to that!
My black is a promise painted like a rainbow you’ll never grey wash my faith, peace never cracks
p.s. my black has wings that sang…

My version of gratitude

Hello to the day, beautifully curated with sunlight, greenery and birds cheering us on.
Today I’ll take you on, with grace, and effort better than the last.
I pray to the heavens where my father resides, and he sends down a shower of blessings.
I greet those that I love far and near, some with hugs, others with yellow hearts and kind words.
Using my mind and body to get things done, although it’s not a joy, at least I have the ability.
Spending time on my hobbies, creativity flows effortlessly through my veins.
Carving out the time for each goal on my list because procrastination and I are on the verge of a breakup.
By the time the moon clocks in, and the stars provide company, I’ll eagerly find relaxation.
Aimless scrolling as I wind down, and brown noise until I’m asleep.
I could complain about how imperfect everyday is but I’ll take a rain check.
Right now, I’m just grateful to be here.

My screen is a scene of something obscene
It’s so serene I hear Myself scream I deemed it extreme
Im not to keen to dream it seems, I mean…..

Step side to side
Sway to our song
Your heart is the lyrics
My soul the instrumental
Hold my hand the way Jesus held the nails
Step side to side
Nerves waltz to love
No music is needed
When sacrifice becomes a verb
I’ll hold you like the space between us is trying to escape
Step side to side
A crowded ball room that only sees us
Watching movies with the sound off
Empty hands have the fullest hearts
And the cup of my rhythmic soul runneth over
p.s. don’t forget to kiss me under the waterfall chandeliers…

Two roads diverged ahead of me –
one known and one less traveled.
There’s been a lot of talk about
how one should take the latter.

They say to seek the new and strange
is the course that is the wiser,
but both seemed new and strange to me
because I’d never taken either.

I traveled for a bit down one
and found much there was gold,
but soon I wondered what glittering things
the other road might hold.

Changing course is not a thing
one can often do with ease.
I trudged across through underbrush
in the darkness of the trees.

I ran into another path-
who could say where this would go?
But one I went because of course
there’s but one way to know.

I’ve done a lot of traveling now
and there’s much that I have learned.
Each path was often weird to walk
and took many curious turns.

There are many books that I could fill
with what I don’t know yet.
But what I think is true is that
none knows which path is best.

So I say if you’re stuck between two roads
and told that you much choose,
to say p’shaw to others and
do what you want to do.

Is it okay
if I lay down?
I am feeling tired
I cannot explain
It’s what I feel

Making bodies
all day and night
Not gracefully
I embrace each moment
and yet it drains me

What does it look like
if I lay down?
Will I be baring
all my weakness
for everyone to see?

I will love in myself, now
that you’re not here,
all the little things
unspoken
that drew us near

Will you still love me
if I lay down?
I am feeling tired
I cannot explain
It’s what I feel

I thought my heart was breaking
Turned out it was growing pains
I wondered often if the aching
I felt so deep inside
Was a symptom of something else
Something much more far and wide

I thought my heart was breaking
But in all reality
The stretching sensation that sent me shaking
Was only a casualty
Of diving in deep straight to my soul
Healing, cleansing and making whole
A place that was once so hidden
Leaving a shell of me almost bed ridden

I thought my heart was breaking
Instead I found I was transcending
All the preconceived thoughts and teachings
Which all brings my soul to this beautiful ascending
New earth that is never ending
Blessings abound, always mending
That which was perceived as broken
Has now been Re birthed
expansions sending
Reverberations of healing through nations
Our one-ness remembered
Return to the heart bending
Home within your soul which always waits to warmly
Calmly
Gently
Unconditionally
Welcome you back
Into a soft embrace.

How many times have I
Done this wicked communion?
I present my body and blood
Not for nourishment
But to be devoured until I am no more
He who eats and drinks of this
Cup unworthily drinks damnation
Unto himself

Unholy communion
Attached to eternal bliss
Forgotten pledge to the cross
As we kiss

We wrestled all night until
The sun peeks its head
above the horizon
And venerates
our bodies with light

You slumber still
I wide awake
Wondering what will this be
Will this man be it for me?
My God my Holy one
The father and son
My Savior
I still feel the essence of your spirit
Inside of me
I still taste the flavor
Of your skin

I still hear the echoes
From the wall
As I call for Jesus
Every inch graced
By your touch
It pleases
All my senses
As I come to the consensus
With my mind body spirit
And soul
You are my God
MY will I submit to you
Let the actions of my body
Be pleasing to you
Feel the eruption of my worship
As my living water flows

Heaven only knows

Dreams of monogamy
Carnal insecure thoughts wondering
If he is lying to me

Because last night we were on earth
Underneath the stars and the moon
Gazing and anticipating
Quiet heavy whispers
Questioning if it’s too soon
I only known you for a moment
But you’re familiar

Like always meant to be mine
Always meant to share space and time
In a past life we were distant lovers
Faithful Ritualistic promises of
See you next lifetime
Engraved in our DNA
And unconscious mind

It’s like I spent every life
searching for you
Too stunned to speak
Loving you from a distance
You noticed me
But we shied away
Translated as indifference

Wondering what am I missing
When will time be kind?
At this very moment
all the timelines
Align

All in-sync
Body to body
Melanin on melanin
Skin in skin
Shedding the weight of
Our earthly bodies and its sin

Ascending into the cosmos
Intertwining until we are one
Only God knows
When we shall be undone
The universe sings praises
And exalts our union
We are gods
The universe is pleased
I cover you just as Nut
Does for Geb
When he admires
Her beauty
We both intertwined
In this web
Of ethereal bliss

We fly past constellations,
planets and Galaxies
And make love
in the nebula clouds
Our sweat scattered across
The universe and heavens

As we take our rest
No need for words
While we lie naked
And undressed
Our chocolate bodies
Dancing in the shadows
Of my head
Heart distressed
At the potential mess
This could be
You’re asleep
And Wide awake I lay
In this bed
As the sun rises
From its slumber
the angels of light
Dance on the walls
of this room
I find peace and rest
in the quiet of
Heaven’s morning
And wait for the
Cleansing
Found in
Heaven’s afternoon

My heart says to love you

My mind says to leave you behind

My heart says you need me

My mind says I’m being too kind

My heart says forgive you

My mind says it’s for the last time

My heart says I’ll miss you

My mind says stop being so blind

My heart says that you’ll change

My mind says it’s just too late

My heart says there’s hope still

My mind says you’ve sealed your own fate

My heart says it’s broken

My mind says to cry and move on

My heart says it’s ready

My mind says the heart’s never wrong