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  • Candi Carroll shared a letter in the Group logo of ParentingParenting group 1 month ago

    Losing a Child

    I had thought that I had been through fire, but last year showed me different. On February 2nd of 2023, I received a phone call as I was on my way to the doctor to prepare for back surgery. My son’s boss called to inform me that he had been in an accident and was unresponsive. I canceled my appointment and rushes a little over an hour to where they took him. Little did I know that I was driving up on the accident as it was being cleaned up. I drove by his truck being towed off with nothing left of his truck. The semi that hit him had damage but not as much, and they survived. Falling apart driving to the hospital, and when I arrived the doctor sat us down in the family room to tell us how bad it was. He had six head fractures to his face and skull. He had broken rib that punctured his lung, broken arm that the bone came through the skin and unresponsive until the day he died. I spent 10 days by his side praying and crying, spending it mostly alone because my family had to work and watch my other kids. I refused to leave him. On the 9th, we were informed that he was brain dead and they couldn’t do anything else. They were sorry but we had to talk about letting him go. On the 10th, I came home long enough before anyone else told my kids, that I had to let their brother go the next day. I had to chase them down the highway and my oldest daughter had just found out she was pregnant. When I got back to the house, I fell to the ground and balled my eyes out. My kids had to pick me up and take me inside. When I calmed down and they calmed down, I returned to the hospital to spend one more night before taking him off the machine. On the 11th, at 10:15am they unplugged him, there was no heartbeat, no breath taken, nothing but silence and crying. No pain will ever beat the pain that I felt in those ten days. I struggle everyday fighting depression missing him. It is so hard to bare. Everyday, I have questions that no one can answer about the accident. I just pray that one day maybe the guy who received his heart, will one day let me hear it. I pray for anyone who has to deal with this pain. He was able to help 6 people with his organs that weren’t damaged. I am so proud of him and he is my hero. I miss him so much.

    Candi Carroll

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    • Candi, I am deeply sorry for the loss of your son and the pain you have endured. Your strength and love for him are evident in your words. I hope that you find peace in knowing that he was able to help others through organ donation. May his memory bring you comfort and may you find the support you need to navigate through your grief.

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      • Thank you so much. I’m doing my best. I wrote my first book for my kids and my second one is struggling with his loss. I hope to be done with it this year.

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  • Rebecca Engle shared a letter in the Group logo of ParentingParenting group 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    Distant

    I am not a parent but I want to be one day today that ability to birth my own changed

    In the quiet of the night, within my soul
    I felt like a shattered bottle, burdened by misfortune
    now fragmented on the ground
    With dreams of motherhood pushed aside.

    Tumors, occupants of my body
    Whispering fear like a consuming fire.
    My body, a battleground, weary,
    Carrying the weight of lost dreams.

    No gentle movements within my womb to experience
    No little hands clasping mine to seal the bond.
    The path to motherhood, radiant and clear
    Now hidden from view.

    Amidst this brokenness a flicker of light shines through
    For not everything is lost despite appearances.
    Though my physical form is fractured my spirit endures,
    In the rubble resilience sustains.

    I am more than the sum of my pieces
    More than the emptiness in my heart.
    In shards of glass reflections of a beginning emerge
    Finding strength, in being reborn.

    For family transcends blood; it is forged through connection
    Love can be found in forms.
    Though the route may have altered the journey continues
    I will navigate through fields adorned with clover.

    So I’ll gather all my fragments, one, by one,
    Beneath the nurturing rays of the healing sun.
    Even though I may never possess everything on my own
    I’ll construct a life where love is eternally sown.

    Within each shattered piece there lies a captivating tale to share
    Of resilience, hope and how I stumbled into despair.
    Yet I emerged more with a courages flame
    Navigating lifes intricate labyrinth without any shame.

    I am not merely a discarded shattered bottle left aside
    Instead I’m a warrior with a stride.
    In this journey, through lifes trials and tribulations
    I find solace knowing that strength is born from foundations.

    Rebecca Engle

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  • Joshua (roses) shared a letter in the Group logo of ParentingParenting group 2 months, 3 weeks ago

    My Son Remember This

    Coloring when you’re younger is letting each shade have it’s alone time
    They say elders deserve it
    But I never had the opportunity to see your hair age to grey
    You were a silver fox
    Illusive with your presence, no matter how much of a present it would be for me
    Doesn’t anyone care about how I feel
    I didn’t ask to be here, yet I am, and everything is falling apart… And I have to pick up the pieces and make something beautiful
    Whoever said horror was beautiful never had a cut deeper than the surface
    I can’t escape this horror story, and adults keep preaching about the honor they don’t even hold on to
    Your moral compass clearly was never fixed so stop trying to fix me
    I’ll do it myself just like everything else
    I don’t care if I take the long way
    What’s a little more pain with this depression
    This is what I imagined your thoughts said after you heard me communicate: mom and dad are getting a divorce
    I’m sorry to have multiplied the trend of men walking out of your life
    Son, I’m sorry and I hope you don’t keep your hands around the neck of a grudge
    My son I love you, I’m sorry your picture of love now has a crack in it,
    My everything, if you hate me and ignore everything else, please remember this: respect is earned not given
    So, learn to give it even when it’s not deserved
    Because pain can learn to heal when patience reflects
    Respect can’t be bought so don’t spend your money on brands expecting it to elevate your title
    Your name holds a weight more valuable than gold, not even the world can hold
    You, let nothing hold you back
    Dad will always have your back
    Respect those that hurt you, more than the love they didn’t give
    When you treat respect like the kindness everyone should receive you won’t have to ask for it
    Then you can paint your own future
    Coloring when you’re older is letting the paint sit at the grown folks table and mix conversation
    p.s. no matter what our colors will always match…

    Roses

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  • Princess Land shared a letter in the Group logo of ParentingParenting group 2 months, 4 weeks ago

    This post is viewable by the Unsealed community only.

    Let’s Talk About Legends

    This letter is only available to The Unsealed subscribers. Subscribe or login to get access!

  • gorilladna shared a letter in the Group logo of ParentingParenting group 4 months, 2 weeks ago

    DEAR KIDS

    I’m sorry if I embarrass you

    Because I’m not like other dads

    This thought often makes me sad

    So I write to shake the blues

    Shame and guilt have haunted me

    As I’ve watched you learn and grow

    And someday I hope you know

    That you’re all I want to be

    But I had to make a choice

    Though it may never seem that way

    To reveal my self one day

    And to speak with my true voice

    And I hope you find yours too

    As you’ll need a voice in life

    To defend yourself from strife

    And to yourself stay true

    Just remember that my heart

    Will never fade or falter

    I will always be your father

    And my love shall not depart

    So now I say goodbye

    Holding memories so close

    Being more than just a ghost

    As I yearn to for your reply

    Love,

    Dad

    Ricardo Albertorio

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  • gorilladna shared a letter in the Group logo of ParentingParenting group 5 months, 3 weeks ago

    ABSOLUTELY YOU

    Dear Unsealers,

    I wrote this poem for my son during a very difficult time last year when he was suffering from depression and suicidal thoughts. Luckily my ex-wife and I (over-re)acted quickly and sought him counseling and medical treatment. Thankfully, today he is stable and thriving in his first year of college…but I will always be vigilant of the signs should they manifest again. I guess the moral of my take is to be vigilant of your child’s mental health and to not be afraid to go overboard with seeking professional help for them. False alarms are better than emergency sirens.

    ABSOLUTELY YOU.

    My infinite sadness

    Is the thought of losing you

    Never has a feeling

    Been so absolute

    Forever is a long time

    To grieve, to mourn, to cry

    But never do I ever

    Want to say goodbye

    Though life’s a little hard right now

    And my happiness minute

    Know absolutely nothing ever

    Keeps me from loving you

    Ricardo Albertorio

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    • Your heartfelt poem resonates deeply, reaching out with the raw emotions of a parent’s love and concern. Your words paint a vivid portrait of the fear and profound love that accompany the journey of parenting, especially during the toughest of times.

      I hear the echoes of your anguish, the silent cries of a soul teetering on the edge of despair.…read more

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  • gorilladna shared a letter in the Group logo of ParentingParenting group 5 months, 3 weeks ago

    PATER

    I am a grateful father

    More importantly, parent

    Through a gift that was God sent

    Delivered by a mother

    Time slips by without notice

    Photos to remind my soul

    Of a sacrifice untold

    They grow from bud to lotus

    And now my grey reminds me

    Of broken bones and scraped knees

    Diapers, prom, college degrees

    Protect them to set them free

    Now I sit to reminisce

    Wishing I had done better

    As my heart writes this letter

    Of those early years I miss

    Ricardo Albertorio

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    • Hello Ricardo,
      I can really relate to your words as a mother of 2 grown children. Those days when they were little and they were with me 24/7 were wonderful!

      Shelley

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  • gorilladna shared a letter in the Group logo of ParentingParenting group 5 months, 3 weeks ago

    MY ARTIST

    My daughter is watercolor song

    A blend of oil paint, chalk, and pencil

    A free-form work without a stencil

    A collage of talent, pure and strong

    Her beauty draws you from the start

    Deep chestnut hair to aqua eyes

    Her humor takes you by surprise

    I know, in life, she’ll leave her mark

    Her passion flows from deep inside

    Her portrait, brushstrokes from her heart

    And all she does, a work of art

    A masterpiece that gives me pride

    Ricardo Albertorio

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  • gorilladna shared a letter in the Group logo of ParentingParenting group 5 months, 3 weeks ago

    RELATIVE TREES

    Relative Trees

    My son is strong, a young oak tree

    His leaves move gently in the breeze

    His shadow calms, puts me at ease

    He is the tree I wish to be

    My tree is rugged, rough, and torn

    Life’s left it’s mark, my bark is worn

    Leaves have fallen; my shade, forlorn

    I’m not the tree that I was born

    My son’s long branches reach the sky

    Grows and flowers as birds come by

    Watch in wonder and start to cry

    As he bears fruit for passersby

    My roots will keep his soil intact

    And block the wind upon his back

    And when the Man comes with His axe

    I’ll be the one that He will hack

    My son’s tree will live long and free

    And he will bloom majestically

    My stump will keep him company

    Under his shade is where I’ll be

    Ricardo Albertorio

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    • awww this is so incredibly sweet. I hope having your son’s back, and seeing all of his wonder, reminds you of your own power and greatness. Don’t let the hardships in life ever weigh down your “branches.” This poem is truly beautiful. your son is lucky to have you. Also, want to share this with @rickwrites — feel like he’d appreciate this piece!

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      • Thank you, again, Lauren. My son is such a beautiful, gentle soul. He also, unfortunately, inherited a propensity for depression and anxiety. Thankfully, he is doing well and flourishing today. I also wrote a similar poem for my daughter, which I will post shortly. The last two years I wrote hundreds of poems as a way to manage my coming out as…read more

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    • Hello Ricardo,
      Your son must be an amazing person. You poem really honors him. Very sweet.

      Shelley

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    • Hi Ricardo,
      Your son sounds wonderful as well.

      Shelley

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  • Chloe shared a letter in the Group logo of ParentingParenting group 8 months, 1 week ago

    little light

    When, oh when
    did I stop smelling your head?
    3 months in
    and my life is already flashing
    in your eyes
    Oh, my little kin-
    it will never be the same
    as it is right now,
    as it is right now

    Why ask why
    when I know you are the answer?
    You give me reason,
    so much joy
    and light
    Oh, sweet child-
    you move me with every smile,
    with every smile

    Your daddy’s son-
    you are the reason
    I fell in love
    Oh, you gentle soul-
    do you even know
    how you’ve rocked my world?
    With the sweetest sound
    I’ve ever heard,
    I’ve ever heard

    My little me,
    may you always know
    the joy you bring
    Oh, how I dreamed of you,
    I dreamed of you

    Goodnight
    to you,
    my little light
    Tomorrow you will light the world
    You will light the world.

    CnSchultz

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  • Jessica Rivera shared a letter in the Group logo of ParentingParenting group 8 months, 3 weeks ago

    Challenges of parenting (the hidden truths)

    “Mommy,” you hear the child screaming for you as they continue to bang on the door. On the other side, the tears continue falling as you pray asking God for strength. Secretly, you hope they will eventually give up, but they don’t. Their crying only gets louder than yours. “Pull it together” you tell yourself as you look in the mirror, splash water on your face, and pull your hair pack. You finally open the door, and your child asks you “mommy why were you crying?” You reply, “mommy wasn’t crying” and just embrace them. The embrace brings comfort to you both, but inside you know it will not be long before you have another breakdown.

    No one likes to talk about the challenges of parenting. Instead, we like to pretend like we have it all figured out. We are ashamed and embarrassed to admit that parenting is one of the most difficult, underappreciated, misunderstood jobs in the world. I am here to break the silence, and to speak on my challenges, and the challenges of those who have not yet (but one day will) be able to use their voice to reach an audience just like you.

    How can you be emotionally available for someone when you are battling your own mental health? Having to attend to a crying, screaming child amid a panic attack is one of the hardest things to do. Or how about feeling the pressure of having to keep your child safe, but you cannot even protect yourself because you feel trapped in a violent relationship. How can you feel like you are doing “a good job” when you are on the verge of getting evicted or the lights are about to get cut off? How can you enjoy being a parent when your child has been diagnosed with a condition that consists of behavioral challenges, developmental delays, or even something life threatening? What happens when the truth whispers in your ear “you don’t enjoy being a mother.” I remember that night as if it were yesterday. I was sleeping on the porch following another episode of violence at the hands of his father. I felt like something was not right, so I went to the emergency room to find out I was pregnant. The love for our children is never the question. It is the circumstances that surround us that make it difficult to enjoy parenting.

    No one likes to talk about challenges. Instead, we go on vacations, take pictures with matching outfits, and smile so no one sees through the dysfunction. Yet, none of that is real, and none of that can help someone who really needs it. My son has two more years before he graduates high school. I miss those nights when he would sneak into my bed with his million and one teddy bears. I miss him wanting to take pictures with me, and our holiday traditions. I miss the old us when it was just us. But those days are so far from me. Now, I am “bruh,” the lady who won’t stop yelling for him to take out the trash. The lady who sits in silence at the football games to ensure I do not embarrass him. He spends more time out with his friends than at home. I can only pray he makes the right decisions. But what happens when your teenage child finds every opportunity to remind you of your mistakes? What if the only person available to blame is you? How do you process angry and hurtful words? How do you forgive yourself?

    How do you forgive yourself when your child is struggling with addiction, and you do not know how to help them? Or how do you forgive yourself when you continue to lose that very same battle and are unable to be what the parent they need and deserve? How do you forgive yourself when they told you they had been sexually abused but you never believed them? How do you try and raise a child to believe in God, when you lack faith yourself? How do you explain divorce to a child? How do you explain to your six-year-old child that we are moving because mommy needs a new start? How do you explain to a crying child that daddy won’t be back for months because he is helping to keep the world safe? How do you explain the death of a parent to a child?

    I want you to know that I understand. I understand you on the days when it is the hardest. I understand you on the days you want to give up and on the days you feel alone. Do not give up! You are not alone. This is proof of it! There is no situation that is more difficult than the other. We are all trying to figure it out. It doesn’t matter if your child has graduated from the most prestigious college or has the most successful career. No parent is perfect, and we have all made mistakes along the way. I am here to tell you that it is okay. You are doing the best you can, with what you have (which just maybe you.) Please be gentle and kind to one another. Do not remind each other of past mistakes. Instead embrace one another. Share resources and words of encouragement. Pray for one another and create safe spaces to share the truths about the challenges of parenting. It takes a village to raise a child. I pray we all find our village of people who are willing to be there without casting judgement. Someone who will say “how can I help?” At different stages, our children require different things from us, and as they grow, we grow with them. May love forever bloom between you and your children.

    JMarie

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    • Aww this is so powerful. I don’t have children, but I know it is not easy to be a parent. I know I wasn’t the easiest child. While there is a lot I don’t know, I do believe all healing and all happiness begins and ends with love. Love your child, and love yourself, and I think more good will follow. Thank you for sharing this very real and honest…read more

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    • Wow. So spot on its a relief to read and know that others have felt the same emotions and asked the same questions as myself. Thank you for posting this.

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    • Hello JMarie,
      This is very powerful. You sound like you have worked hard to make the best of a difficult situation. Stay strong and continue to be the great paren you are.

      Shelley

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  • Michelle shared a letter in the Group logo of ParentingParenting group 10 months, 2 weeks ago

    A broken bond? Or a Blessing?

    I loved you before you saw me, before our eyes locked, when we shared a heartbeat. I dreamed of you. I imagined what you would look like when I held you in my arms for the first time. I never realized that I would have to break our bond so that you could thrive.
    You see, I had a monster that followed me. He broke my heart and he broke my bones.
    My spirit was the last to go when he attacked my beautiful dreams of raising you with your brothers and sister. The very thought of the monster finding us, and involving you, drove a sword deep into my chest and pierced my heart. Your innocence had to be protected. I searched my soul and found you a promising Mother and Father.
    I knew they would protect you, that they would teach you to be the best man there ever is/ was. I trusted them to love you, and to honor our precious bond. Things turned out so terribly wrong for me. I’m deeply grateful that everything is amazing for you. Except that my heart broke into a thousand mini pieces the day that I had to say goodbye to you. In the rain, as they wheeled me out of the hospital holding your car seat so close to my heart your beautiful eyes locked onto mine. I felt so ashamed. I loved you so much my beautiful Son. I handed you over to your the wonderful man that was to become your Father. I believe in that moment, I felt my heart snap. You started to cry, and suddenly everything I thought I was doing that was right felt so terribly wrong. I think that it was the breaking of what had been our bond. I never saw you again. They had to move far away, and they told me that they would let me be a part of your life, but you still do not know me. I only receive pictures of you on Christmas, and sometimes your birthday. I never quite understood how a heart could be broken by a situation, yet coming to a realization of the situation being a blessing in disguise would make it whole again.
    That will make no sense at all to many, all that matters is that I know what I am saying. It’s not an “adoption” they are your guardians, yet they are your Mother, and Father to me. However; You are still my Son too. I don’t want to confuse you so I stay far away. I open your pictures when I receive them, and I pray. I hope that one day, you will understand that they needed you, and WE needed them. I am kind of your mother, I love you more that you will ever know. I just hope our bond is strong enough that you will not be harmed by my decision to give you the world while mine was quaking and crumbling with fear and unstableness. They gave you everything that I could not. I love you…

    M.

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    • Michelle, this letter to your son really touched me. I am so overwhelmed by your vulnerability and courage. The sacrifices we make for our children can be the most difficult. I too understand what it is to make the toughest decision of your life due to being in a toxic relationship. I pray that one day you will have the opportunity to meet your…read more

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      • Michelle this is so beautifully crafted. Thank you for sharing this with others. The dichotomy of a broken bond or blessing is one that others can relate to you have been in your shoes. The lengths some parents will go for their children to keep them safe is unimaginable, yet very real. I hope one day your son is able to read this and understand…read more

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    • Hello M,
      You made a great sacrifice to give your son happiness. I am sure he appreciates what you did for him. I am sure he is a wonderful young man.

      Shelley

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  • Ashley M Dowd shared a letter in the Group logo of ParentingParenting group 11 months, 2 weeks ago

    A Mother's Broken Heart in Manuscript

    Never in a million years would I have ever thought it would be YOU.
    To bring my heart so much pain like throwing salt on an open wound
    You were my why and one of the most special gifts from God that I truly admired.
    Wanting the best life for you gave me reason to work harder.
    I wanted to be the mother to you that I always longed for and
    what was once a blessing now seems like a curse
    Oh, how I never thought the tables would turn.
    Though I will always love you my heart resembles a broken glass and
    Though pain and disappointment has cut me so deep
    I just cover it up with a mask.
    How could you say you love me yet cause me so much pain
    I’m constantly worried and praying for you.
    while you’re out without a care in the world dancing in the rain
    When you sit back and reflect on your life
    All of your happiest moments were due to MY sacrifice.
    Now I’m lucky if you would even consider my advice
    You have transformed from my baby, my first love
    To a person that’s intentionally toxic in my life and
    As I try to figure out what caused this change I have yet to figure out why
    But as much as you have hurt me
    I cant find it in my heart not to love you
    Just know my objective was always to the best mom I could ever be to you
    But with the results I see I count it as a mission failed
    But I know God can change anything.
    So in the meantime, I’m waiting for him to prevail.

    Ashley Dowd

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    • This is so beautiful at the same time so sad. I can feel the love and pain through this message so deeply, because I have a daughter to who I had wished growing up wouldn’t do the same to me, as we were so close and only had each other; and Thank God she didn’t. We had our ups and downs, but most was up and still is today. But I now have a…read more

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      • Aww thanks for your feedback I wrote this poem when my oldest daughter was experiencing a teenage crisis she was 16 and in love for the first time while acting out and being defiant but I can proudly say she has turned over a new leaf and our close knit relationship has resumed she has two kids now by her first love from back then but all and all…read more

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    • Motherhood is so hard. I have a daughter myself she’s still so little but that doesn’t keep me from thinking that I’m not doing enough. I don’t want her and I to have the same relationship as I did with my mother but the thought of that happening still haunts me. God will prevail he always does. Gods speed. <3

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      • He definitely will, that you can believe. Don’t think that you will make the same mistake your mother may have made that would interfere in you and your daughters relationship. You are your own person and you don’t have to follow in her footsteps. Motherhood is and will always be hard, but all we have to do and it may sound easy, but it’s not, and…read more

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    • This made me cry and I can truly relate to struggling with a teenage child, feeling like a failure, and waiting for Gods promises to turn things around. Thank you for speaking the truths about parenting. I think it is so important to know that we are not alone. Everyone always tells me it wont always be this way. In my heart I know this is true,…read more

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    • Hello Ashley,
      I am sure your child will come around and one day bring you the happiness you deserve.

      Shelley

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  • Ashley M Dowd shared a letter in the Group logo of ParentingParenting group 11 months, 2 weeks ago

    Labor & Delivery

    Parenting reveals a love in you that you never knew exist. Thats the real definition of love at first sight sealed with a gentle kiss. You have this new human that soley belongs to you now you can finally put a face to them kickball kicks you felt in your womb. Everything changes in a instant and you are officially titled a mom, and the weight that comes with this title automatically mentally mentions that you are STRONG. But may I full warn you that you have a long road ahead and there are many things you will experience especially when you are not prepared. Its levels to this parenting process that you will surely go through, but every child is different so best wishes to you. No matter what you must keep the faith and don’t give up because abandonment is not a option no matter how many nerves they grow up and pluck. Its attending games, recitals and graduations and planning birthdays and sleepovers that make the life of parenting feel so rewarding. Not to mention if you are a respected example as a parent they may inquire for your advice and opinion and even share the issues of their heart and their deepest dark secrets. Parenting is trial and error but it’s a mandatory assignment to LOVE. Remember love is a action word and a valid license to serve. Parenting produces memories and is also designed to introduce good habits and sometimes the pointers that you may get from books and pamphlets don’t always make you a great parent. Its dedication mixed with prayer and bullet proof patience and a community of support that’s willing to listen in a conversation and not sit in the judgment seat like there mirrors are windex clean but remind you that you are not alone because we stand as a team. So parenting is a community full of experiences and advice so welcome aboard and buckle up for the ride.

    Ashley Dowd

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    • Aww this is so sweet. I am not a parents but I do agree with you that while so much is trial and error, the one thing all children need – without question – is love. That’s what all people need! Love heals and empowers. Love is always home. You sound like a wonderful and thoughtful mother. <3 Lauren

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      • Thanks Lauren I want my readers to know that parenting is beautiful and rewarding experience but it’s definitely not easy but it’s a reality that all parents will face and have their own experiences. So, make the best of it and don’t give up.

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    • I’m a mother of 3 under the age of 3 and this speaks volumes. Parenting is the toughest and most rewarding thing I’ve ever experienced. From long nights of a toddler that just won’t sleep to a newborn who’s always hungry. Being a parent is mentally and physically exhausting but it’s all worth it when you sit back and reflect on all of their ach…read more

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    • Love your story, and you’re right, buckle up for the ride, and a ride it will be, but in the long run, a ride well worth it. I wrote a poem once called, “I loved you from the moment I saw you”, and that’s exactly how it is and all the moments and times you don’t think you will handle it, you find a way. You really can’t help yourself, you’re…read more

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  • artistphilly shared a letter in the Group logo of ParentingParenting group 1 year ago

    An Apology to My Unborn Daughter: Reflections on Loss, Pain, and Regret

    Dear precious daughter,

    I am writing this letter to you with a heavy heart, as I never got the chance to hold you in my arms and tell you how much I love you. You were taken away from us too soon, and it has been a source of immense pain for me and your mother ever since.

    I want to apologize to you for not being there for your mother after we lost you. I was in so much pain and felt so helpless that I didn’t know how to be there for her. I thought it was the right thing to do to distance myself from the situation, but looking back, I know that it only made things worse.

    My inability to be there for your mother during that time caused a rift in our relationship that led to the eventual breakdown of our marriage. I know that I bear some responsibility for this, and it’s something that I have been carrying with me for a long time.

    Losing you left a void in my life that nothing could ever fill. It felt like a part of me had been taken away, and I was unable to find any relief from the pain. But then, one day, you came to me in a dream, and it was like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders.

    You let me know that you are with me, even though I can’t hold you in my arms. You are here for me in my heart and my soul, and that has brought me some measure of comfort over the years. I still cry for you, thinking about how I wasn’t there for you and your mother when we needed each other the most.

    I want you to know that you are loved and missed every day. I know that I can never make up for the pain that I caused, but I promise to honor your memory and carry you with me always.

    Love always,
    Your Father

    Rashan Speller

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    • I’m so sorry that you lost your daughter Rashan. I’m sure that must have been very hard for you. Sometimes in life we go through a lot of suffering wondering why things happen. I’m glad you were able to learn from your regrets and build yourself up for the future. We aren’t perfect but we learn from our past.

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      • Thank you for your kind words and understanding. It’s true that we all face challenges and regrets in life, but it’s important to learn from them and grow. Your empathy means a lot to me.
        It can be helpful to remember that we are not alone in our struggles. Many people have faced similar challenges and have found ways to overcome them. It’s…read more

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    • Awww Rashan, I am sending you the absolute biggest hug. You need to forgive yourself. When people experience trauma like that it’s so hard for us to process that sometimes we don’t always deal with it in the best way possible, but it’s our brains just trying to protect ourselves from the immense pain. You clearly have a big and kind heart. So, be…read more

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      • 😍 I have healed a lot since then gone to therapy to understand and speak about my feelings and grow from them. I even started a business with my daughters name so she can always be here with me.

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    • I’m so sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine what that must have been like for you. God sends us signs when we need it most. I’m so glad that you have learned from your past experiences as far as being there for the ones you love goes. Losing someone you love brings great grief but loving and supporting those affected brings great healing. Gods speed.

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      • I appreciate you and the time you took to respond and send positive energy to me. Thank you and yes it was very hard but I know she is watching over me every day.

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