Dear Charmaine,

What you love about this chapter in your life is it is believed to be…Pruning time! Pruning is something you found out that continuously needs to happen. You get cut down, cut back, trimmed on. It can come out of nowhere or you can see it coming. You realize that when you are serving God, get ready or don’t be shocked when it happens. He will cut you with things that are going to test your faith. To see if you are spouting words or believe what He says. No matter if it is your health, people, rejection, finances or whatever. He wants you to grow back stronger and more beautiful. He wants you to say “I have a TESTimony” My God brought me through!!! People trying to take your home you worked so hard for. Your insecurities that you allowed people to give you, questioning your ministry and self. Your children’s health, your marriage. Your rare, mysterious health issues. God is bringing you through them all. He will continually bring you through them all! You are here to witness God’s Goodness, Grace and Mercy. How can you do this unless you walk through some swaps, dirt, mud, been through some terrible storms. To say you are still here, you are still standing. God has brought you through. Even though you don’t want the tornado to come your way, you don’t want things eating at you or being cut down to start again. God is able!!! He is letting you be prune, so you can stand beautifully ready to be open again, to Bloom in another Season. Trust God, It is not what you want! But God knows it is what you need! So remember it is Pruning Time Again!??!
As I would say you are actually the perfect candidate for God to use. You have no special degree in any minister, no special teacher degree or a scholar. Not the popular girl and most experienced in life. That is where God gets His Glory from the normal, mundane, not so look at, not so talk about young lady. It is funny that you are someone who seems to be doing some stuff now. Things out of your character, realm of knowledge and expertise.You don’t have a degree in that. How are you going to tell others the truth about things? Well, God is the only answer to how. If you are a believer, it is the only answer that makes sense! That God uses the simple things of the world to confuse the wise. He also is using you again in sharing His Glory by using a health problem. He allows you to have this unique, rare mysterious condition. That teams of doctors are scratching their heads over. Questions of why it came, where it came from and now how do they treat you? There are no seemingly bad habits, no drug, alcohol, or smoking in my life. You are pretty much healthy and young. No high blood pressure, diabetics, no history of cancers in the family. “So what do I have and how are the doctors going to treat it?” So here comes God showing his miracle magic miraculous all knowing power! Showing them treatment to try, but ultimately He has to heal and save!!! That job forever belongs to Him. So, He wants you to testify of his goodness and grace! How often do you and others say no you can’t do this minister thing! God says Yes You Can!!!
When the doctors, professionals and you are all confused about what is going on in your body and why. God is here to say, “I AM NOT! I know all, I see all, I knitted you in your mothers womb. I made every cell, tissue and bone. Just look at me and I will show you how and why I am the chief physician who never lost a case!!!” You have to say Hallelujah Amen to that. So, this rare, unique, mysterious flower in God’s garden is destined to bloom. No matter how many storms come to destroy and cut you down. God controls storms, they cease at His command!!! So even when you are pruned again, because you will. You know who holds the future, your tomorrow and beautifully allows you to Bloom!!!
Love you and keep pursuing your purpose. You love this chapter of your life because God has pulled you through, made you see things you never thought you could face before and show you your strength in the midst of the storms.

Blessings,
Charmaine

What I love about this chapter of my life is that I am here to write it.

So many storied lives go unpublished.
Short ones are the most unwritten–part of what makes them so tragic:

There is an inherent injustice to a tale that never makes it past the first sentence, never lives as a fully realized premise.

Yet, here I am to even write that. What an existence!
I don’t need it to rhyme, though that’s always nice.
I don’t get to know the whole plot line, but I do choose my own adventures.

In this chapter of my life, I know that I can hide
or reveal myself in–or is it with?–these words.

All that really matters is that I do sit and commit
To writing it–this chapter, that is–
For I’ll never truly know if it’s the last one.

But the last thing I love about this part of my narrative
is that I’m finally sure the present chapter is always the best one.

Until tomorrow, that is.

My life is a dream I never dreamt.
My past is a fate I’d never tempt.
Enveloped in love, unburdened by grief,
Every breath that I take is a sigh of relief.
Everything that I see is beauty, perfection.
Every step that I take is by His direction.
No need to recall my turbulent past,
Frozen but fluid, dripping like glass.
My world is at peace through a rose-colored lens
As a new world inside me only begins.

As We Climb

As we climb, no one really knows what’s on our minds

As we climb, we are not sure along the way what we’ll find

As we climb, the path ahead, it can be a little blurry

As we climb, let’s make sure we don’t grow to worry

As we climb, we know that everything takes time

As we climb, try to keep that in mind

As we climb, there needs to be a passion inside

As we climb, burn with the blaze and drive of an iron side

As we climb, we develop a grace and elegance of royalty

As we climb, continually stoking the fire in our belly as if out of self-loyalty

As we climb, we can proclaim
we will take back our strength
we will take back our worth
we will take back our power

And as we climb, we will show the world the true meaning of a survivor

I could use somebody
Not for a moment in time someone who’s all mine
you know they’d have to be pretty divine
a being in search of their highest self

you know spiritually inclined not just running around here low level with a dirty mind

But I need them truly concerned with elevating and transcending that little thing that you all consider time

Your avatar t doesn’t matter I’m concerned about the here and the there after
I called that our spiritual chapter

So the question is can you hold my hand , when I’m not me….
when I’m slaying my pain but still riddled with those things called grief and anxiety

When those emotional pain hits my gut
So bad bad they don’t wanna stay inside of me so I throw them up

but all I need you to do is be there
maybe hold my hair
just exist with no twist of your arm no red flags and no
Alarms

just long loving arms
Of spiritual devotion to the laws of the universe
I manifested this with my 123 love potion

Now guide this twin flame on it’s love ocean

A goddess love requires devotion and that’s to the ancestors of love/light to honor them you should do it well and treat me right

And if you do I’ll make sure I give you some like every other night

because the reality is… I could use somebody
somebody not to use me
but just to be…with me

And that’s on TruSpit

Through my lifelong observations of the human experience, encompassing its trials, setbacks, and triumphs, and drawing wisdom from some of the world’s greatest minds—from Cesar Chavez’s struggles on California farmlands to Nietzsche’s contemplations in the Swiss Alps on the concept of God, from Shakespeare’s portrayal of human frailty to the works of the poet Baidel exploring humility’s vast pastures, and contemplating Albert Camus’ existential reflections—I was inspired to write a poem.

Painting Colorless Colors

Poem: By Alexander Siddiqui

At the outset, we stride into the boundless expanse of philosophical exploration,
Where theories bloom like constellations in the night.

Within the shadows of intellectual toil and the intricate weave of scholarly discourse,
Empathy often remains a gem obscured, awaiting revelation,
Veiled within the labyrinth of the mind’s sight.

Yet amidst the cosmic ensemble of ideas,
A guardian-like supernova emerges, casting its gleaming light,
A beacon of truth in the enveloping darkness,
A shimmering fabric of humanity woven with threads of enlightenment.

It reminds us that genuine connection with others
Resonates like harmonious notes,
A delicate melody in the heart,
A perfect symphony of souls in the divine orchestra of existence.

Approach each encounter as a celestial journey,
Navigating galaxies of cognition and perception,
Where understanding serves as a guiding pulsar,
Illuminating the path through the cadence of introspection,
A heavenly compass pilgrimaging the astral seas.

Conquer the hypotheses, elevate the strategies, and refine the techniques
Yet as we sketch life’s grand canvas,
Handle them with the grace of an artist’s brush,
For in the delicate art of touching souls,
We must paint with the palette of humility and kindness,
Our hands guided by the constellations of empathy and compassion,
Painting colorless colors of humanity.

You’re perfect, my kind of perfect
Especially when we peck lips for a kiss
Feeling the intimacy with your gentle touch
It makes me feel so complete, whole, and alive
Just as if nothing was wrong and all my worries disappeared
You can hypnotize me with your gorgeous eyes
Or with the words you speak from your mouth
Either way, you make me forget of life’s hardships
And create a bubble like it’s only you and me
Within the current moment of Father Time
You can be a cute geek without the perfect tone body
Hate the way you laugh loud or have too much body hair
Either way, I’ll still love you just the same
Because the way you look, mmm, I can’t get enough
You can charm me with a big, adorable smile on your face
Become such a gentleman and a total romantic
Or even say I look beautiful when I think I’m a mess
Either way, I’ll fall for it everyday, every time, and anywhere
Because your smile and personality is out of this world
You can make mistakes and mess up like everyone else
Or accidentally say the wrong thing to hurt some feelings
Either way darling, no one is perfect on this earth
But no matter what, somehow and someway
You are my kind of perfect and always have been
Since the very first day that we met and fell in love
There’s so many ways to describe and say
Of just how perfect you are in my hazel eyes
I hope you can see it and believe it to be true
Because there’s simply no one else that can replace you
You are a one of a kind, my love, a one of a kind