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  • Lorinda Boyer shared a letter in the Group logo of ParentingParenting group 1 hours, 26 minutes ago

    Sweatshirt Stain

    “Mom. Mom. MOM!” Dawson yelled.
    Why did he insist on calling me from upstairs? Was I the only one with legs in this house? I started up the staircase, muttering as I climbed. I reached the top and found Dawson sitting on his bed meticulously inspecting a sweatshirt in his hands.
    “What do you want?” He looked up, clearly as annoyed as I was though not for the same reason.
    “Mom, why didn’t you try harder to get this stain out of my sweatshirt?” I strained to see what he was pointing to. He shoved the sweatshirt inches from nose and still the spot was barely visible.
    “Did you try all of the stain removing products?” He demanded more than questioned. I resisted glancing at the clock on the wall which would inevitably announce how late this ridiculous conversation was making us. The cats circled his unmade bed, meowing for their breakfast. He’d put on a t-shirt but was still wearing pajama bottoms and hadn’t brushed his hair by the looks of it. All those unfinished tasks yet to be ticked off the morning list caused a nervous twitch at the corner of my eye. I called upon my inner yoga-mom, took a deep breath, exhaled.
    “You did not tell me it had a stain when you threw it in the wash, so I washed it. That set the stain making it nearly impossible to remove. When I finally noticed the stain, I treated it several times and re-washed it, still to no avail.”
    His eyes widened; he dropped his sweatshirt on the bed. “So, you’re just going to give up?” His voice cracked.
    I scanned his face certain he must be pulling a fast one on me. His tight expression revealed otherwise. But instead of conjuring feelings of motherly compassion, I lost my temper altogether.
    “Dawson, half my life is likely over. I am not going to spend what precious moments I have remaining scrubbing a stain out of a six-dollar sweatshirt. You’re young. If you want to scrub that stain, have at it. Knock yourself out. But I’m done. Now get ready.”
    The drive to school was mostly silent and I had a chance to calm down and see the incident for what it really was, a vehicle to channel emotions he was feeling but hadn’t the words to express. We were both having a hard time accepting this next step, but we’d agreed on it. This was the last day Dawson would attend high school. At least for the year, I was officially withdrawing him.
    I pulled into my usual designated handicapped parking spot and unlocked the doors. Dawson cast an accusatory look at me because of course I was breaking the law. But for like three minutes, I reasoned. He snatched his pencil, an eraser, and a protein bar, from the stash in the glove compartment, grabbed the car door handle.
    “Hey, babe,” I reached across the seat, laid my hand on his shoulder, “The stain will fade over time. All stains do.” He smiled back at me.
    “Love you, too Mom.”
    I drove to the district office as if to a graveside, with a heavy heart. I walked slowly up the steps and straight to the receptionist’s desk.
    “Hi, I’m here to withdraw my son from school.”
    She looked at me with a confused expression. “So, you want to take him out of school?”
    I nodded.
    “Do you want to homeschool him?” she asked.
    “Oh god, no.” She raised her eyebrows, and I was immediately embarrassed by my response. I explained I wanted to fill out paperwork to withdraw him from school, take him out, nothing else. She picked up the phone to call someone upstairs with more authority. It only took a few moments for the woman from upstairs to make it downstairs. She listened to my story, nodded.
    “Yes, I’ll get the paperwork for you.”
    It was involuntary, the tear that rolled down my nose and landed right where I needed to sign my name.
    The woman with more authority leaned into me, patted my shoulder. “He can always come back,” she assured.
    I thanked her for her kindness. I wondered if she could feel my failure. I wondered if she knew this was my second son to drop out, that I couldn’t inspire even one of my children to finish school. I thanked both women and made my way back to the car.
    Inside the silent vehicle, I leaned onto the steering wheel. Rested my head for a moment. I closed my eyes and just breathed. Dawson never did have a decent day in school, especially once his father left. Every day had been a constant struggle with his tears, anxiety, and the effects of his obsessive-compulsive disorder. For my part, I’d simply tried everything I could. I threatened, bargained, bribed, begged and finally yesterday, I agreed to let him drop out. It was going to happen in less than six months when he turned eighteen anyway. Why prolong the inevitable.
    Was I giving up? Maybe. For sure I was being forced to give up on my dreams and expectations for what I believed his life should be. And I’d have to learn to live with the stain it would leave on my mom-heart. But I reminded myself that it would fade over time. All stains do.

    Lorinda Boyer

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  • Necia Campbell shared a letter in the Group logo of PoetryPoetry group 1 days, 4 hours ago

    This post is viewable by the Unsealed community only.

    Iron Sword

    This letter is only available to The Unsealed subscribers. Subscribe or login to get access!

  • Lexi Mae Edwards shared a letter in the Group logo of PoetryPoetry group 1 days, 23 hours ago

    Sparkle

    There’s a sparkle that lights
    when I look your way.
    Catching me off guard
    with how the work goes into play.
    Sometimes I feel like I’m dreaming
    when we’re with one another.
    Something I’ve seen in the movies
    but this time it’s with each other.
    You light up my life
    like a spark that I never knew I needed.
    My mind ponders—
    you’re the one who thought
    I often drift too.
    We’re still so young
    so much ahead—
    picturing these moments with you
    is like a story
    one I’m glad I can just apprehend.
    Continuing to blossom
    like the rose buds
    in the early spring.
    Due to the water
    making sense why it rains so much
    when we’re with one another.
    God is just trying to shed light
    among our sparkle,
    allowing our blossom
    into the upcoming.
    Never thought it was possible
    yet still grateful for the moments
    the ones that are in the upcoming.
    You being a space of security
    a place I never thought I needed.
    Showing me what it’s like
    for one to care for another.
    Making my heart
    want to continue to spread.
    Allowing you more
    as we discover
    who one another is.
    The life we set
    does not sound alarm.
    Allowing my vulnerable self
    to show through
    making me smile
    on the inside as well as out.
    Creating peace
    throughout our world.
    The one where—
    no worry—
    letting me know
    it’s okay.
    Giving me reassurance
    making me realize that
    you really are going to stay.
    Not that I didn’t think you wouldn’t;
    you’re just there for my overthinking mind.
    We will continue to grow
    within our world—
    one that is immaculate.
    No matter what is thrown in our way—
    we’ll figure it out
    as we have each other.
    Creating a space
    to which no harm—
    will come our way.

    Lexi Mae

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  • Once I Was Lost

    I walked to life in a dark cloud not caring,
    Taking roads that lead to of hurt and being daring.
    So many times wondering why my life kept turning up bad,
    Thinking is this all there is and why I’m so sad.
    No one to help me not even friends or family,
    Looking for a hand, looking for a chance to pull up out of this clamity.
    I’ve been down so long out on the streets of cold,
    Time is racing by and in a blink of an eye I am old.
    I’ve been lost for so long feeling like there is no end in sight,
    I want to be found in the eyes of someone before I take flight.
    Then one day I stopped for just a moment and quiet came over me,
    I was finally found by the one who was always there,
    So I was never really lost, just needed to see who actually cared.

    Natalie Inzero-Ayala

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  • Natalie Inzero-Ayala shared a letter in the Group logo of PoetryPoetry group 2 days, 11 hours ago

    The Path I Didn't Take

    As I sit and reflect on my past journey wondering what life could have been,
    I tried to imagine what path I didn’t take and when.
    Some could have made me a singer some a lawyer and some an artist,
    How my life could have been different but maybe not better not even the slightest.
    There are things I would have done differently so many regrets,
    But I wouldn’t be the person I am even with all the upsets.
    To trials and tribulations in this thing called path maker,
    I’ve learned and unlearned what stitched my thoughts forever.
    I may not have been a singer or lawyer or even a great painter,
    But the things that really matter are the people I affect which is so much greater.
    So as I reflect on the path that I am on now,
    I smile with content with what makes me self-bow.
    For in this life what makes what’s important is never what we think,
    It’s what we’ve learned and grown from and to pass it on to every person’s eternal link.

    Natalie Inzero-Ayala

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  • Natalie Inzero-Ayala shared a letter in the Group logo of PoetryPoetry group 3 days, 4 hours ago

    The Mom I Knew

    As a child I looked to you for comfort and safety,
    You were the one I ran to in times of trouble to the point of making you crazy.
    When I was a teenager I had questions about life and love,
    You gave me your experiences and told me to wear life loose like a glove.
    Your unconditional love you taught me to be,
    No matter what I did you forgave and trusted me.
    Now as an adult this disease took what made you you,
    What was lovingness has been turned into madness and memories robbed too.
    I look for moments of clarity in the eyes of my mom,
    I miss the person I looked up to so savvy and calm.
    No matter what this disease takes from our whole family,
    It can’t take my memory or even my sanity.
    So now it’s time for me to teach my mom what she taught me,
    To not be afraid and to love unconditionally.

    Natalie Inzero-Ayala

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    • Oh my gosh, Natalie, I am on the verge of tears reading this. It is absolutely beautiful. I am so sorry about your mom’s illness. But her love and your love are both such a wonderful example of humanity. Whether your mom can express it or not, she is proud of you. I am proud of you. Sending you the biggest hug. <3 Lauren

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      • Laure thank you so very much, you don’t know how much your kind words mean to me. I’m just so blessed that I each day with her. I had to write that poem because I wanted her to see how much she means to me before it’s too late. Again thank you very much!!

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  • tortured_hope shared a letter in the Group logo of Mental HealthMental Health group 3 days, 23 hours ago

    Lingering words

    I eat till I’m full
    That’s not true
    I eat till I’m half full
    Wait that’s not right either
    I take a couple bites
    There that’s the truth
    I eat for myself
    No…
    I eat to please others
    I willingly eat
    Actually I force the food down my throat into my unwilling stomach
    You’re fat
    You’re fat
    You. Are. Fat.
    I fall into spells of confusion and dizziness
    I black out
    I’m forgetting who I am
    What was it like
    Before it all
    Before the pain
    Before the tears
    Before reality set in
    Before you’re words were all I heard
    Now I can’t eat
    I can’t look at myself and be happy with who I am
    Cause your voice sits in the back of my mind reminding me
    You’re ugly
    You’re fat
    You’re worthless
    You. Are. Nothing.
    Sincerely,
    your daughter

    Tortured_hope

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    • You are beautiful. You are worthy. You are perfect the way you are. I struggled with eating issues in my teens. It was connected to anxiety, but I became so conscious of my weight. There was a quote by a blogger that hit me hard and it said, “Nothing looks as good as healthy feels.” Feeling healthy and strong will heal your mind and will help you…read more

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  • Oswald Perez shared a letter in the Group logo of PoetryPoetry group 6 days, 6 hours ago

    Mother's Day

    Dear Unsealers:

    It’s the second Sunday in May.

    I wanted to wish all the mothers in this group and Lauren’s mom too, a Happy Mother’s Day!

    I’ve written a poem to mark the occasion:

    The second Sunday in May
    A day to honor all the motherly figures in our lives

    Mothers, aunts, grandmothers, mothers to be
    To cherish them for all they do
    To hold their memories in our hearts
    More than these words can possibly say

    Mothers are the backbone of the world
    This fact needs to be repeated
    Today, tomorrow and every day

    With all the love if this day is too difficult
    All the comfort and joy abound

    From me to you, I wish all of you
    A Happy Mother’s Day!

    Oswald Perez

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  • Roses shared a letter in the Group logo of PoetryPoetry group 6 days, 17 hours ago

    Writers Block

    The Tortured Poets Department has a writer’s division that has to approve every poem before it goes out
    And my mind is tired of being held hostage
    A loose-leaf definition of writer’s block was once defined by the utter of: I don’t feel like writing, this isn’t good enough, my hand only works for the remote today
    Then she interrupts my train of thought to ask: why have you never wrote a poem about me
    It’s not that I haven’t
    There are 100s getting as comfortable as you can be in the waste basket
    The last poem I Kobe shot, Melo made, and Curry posed to the trash can started like this:
    An eye lash is trying to make your cheek more than just a Sunday service sanctuary
    It wants a home
    I know you’d like me to remove it
    But who am I to destroy a home
    I can’t help but think how beautiful you look with that eye lash
    As it rests there like a pair of doves flirting on a branch not far away from me
    What are you starring at, she exclaims
    Oh, nothing I reply, today I’ll let the eye lash remain
    On
    Your rosy cheeks, kissed by my dead rose petal lips
    Reminding you of the time we went camping and you hated that you smelled the outside
    You hated that you smelled like outside
    And I kept teasing you but hiking, visualizing, and tenting next to nature is maybe the closest thing to
    Falling asleep to your beautiful
    Falling asleep to your beautiful
    Falling asleep to your gorgeous
    Ugh, I can never find the right words to describe a tenth of your gorgeous
    And it makes me want to drop dead out of frustration
    Because the writers need to feel exactly what I do when they read:
    Holding her hand is to get a glimpse of forever before I die
    Holding her makes my heart resemble the flight of a butterfly
    Holding her hand is to hold my battles in the palm of my hand and make them cry
    The writers consist of a delicious various assortment of personality; often referred to as me, myself, and I
    Every time I get ready to seal this poem to you the writer’s block me from letting you receive it
    p.s. I haven’t learned to love myself enough to love you…

    Roses

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    • Aww Roses, sending you the biggest hug. There is a lot of softness in this. I hope you learn to love yourself because you have so much love to give. Thank you for sharing. <3 Lauren

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  • Roses shared a letter in the Group logo of PoetryPoetry group 6 days, 17 hours ago

    The Last Breath of the Flame

    The clock, the watch, the phone all have eyes that watch from the view of 2 AM untamed
    Heart rates jumping like the heat of the flame
    Me plus You is a movie, what is the name
    Our love doesn’t fit in the frame
    So, cameras get jealous of the panorama pane
    Real love never goes without pain that can be immense
    So, if you’re hurt let patience play offense
    Slow dancing with your memories is a nostalgic essence
    Sweat dancing with the burning scent
    Wick burning with confidence
    Mirroring our silhouette, naked thoughts present tense
    My hands without your curves, a death sentence
    Each kiss turns a page of my sixth sense
    I don’t need a third eye to see your imperfect contents
    Table this: beauty is born from cracks so use the hurt as accents
    She is priceless so keep your two cents
    Temptation is off limits but I climbed the fence
    The candle falls asleep to our aroma, hence
    The flame goes out, conclusion love making after an argument
    Sweet dreams enter in the tango of sheets, legs, hearts, rest swiftly to the comfort of her name
    My heart is tied to yours, no more games
    I’ve played tug of war and came out lame
    No more burns unless it’s from the candle tamed
    p.s. this is what it feels like when peace kisses love…

    Roses

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  • Jahnari Nicholas shared a letter in the Group logo of PoetryPoetry group 1 weeks ago

    The Ordeal

    The Ordeal

    Call it what you want but I’m being straightforward,

    I’m trying my hardest to focus on myself but there is always that part of me that has to vent my good vibes of love even though too much of a good thing can easily go bad.

    Some can call it selfish I don’t care anymore,

    I’m looking for someone I can always feel comfortable and proud showering with care and inviting to places and events two friends can’t just go to.

    I’m not saying it ever has to be more than a beautiful friendship, neither am I saying we can’t have other friends or interests.

    I’m saying that I prefer to work on myself and have that one person to escape with whom I can rely on to be considerate and honest with me.

    Well aware of circumstances I wouldn’t have to be more than a friend emotionally I would only suffer in moments of weakness where I confuse what I want with how I think I feel.

    In my best headspace, I know that I will forever crave bonding on a personal level with this one person we focus on only each other in that sense. I know the reality that life happens things and people change and so do the things we want and how we feel.

    But all of that is just an attempt to be safe and cautious about the passion that burns within my soul.

    At heart I want to ignite a connection with someone that will change our lives forever I want to fail and lose in front of someone who won’t see it as weak until I win but see it as the strength in my character to keep walking in the rain until I reach the other side of the storm.

    Truthfully I don’t know who I’m wishing for or when I will find them but I’m at a place where I know how much having someone right there in that place will mean to me I know that I’ve so far with people who weren’t capable of holding up and sometimes nobody there at all.

    I’ve messed up good things before,
    I’ve fumbled many bags,
    I’ve sold many wins,
    I still haven’t quit,

    This is more than sexual desire,
    This is more than craving intimacy,
    This is more than needing a partner,
    This is more than trying to fill voids,
    This is more than a me thing,
    I’m not sure what this feeling is but I know for a fact that I will never stop feeling this until that one is found.

    All I’m saying is,
    For now, let’s dance,
    For now, let’s Sing,
    For now, Let’s Party,
    For now, let’s dress up and go out,
    For now, Let’s Eat,
    For now, let’s just enjoy the moments in life we might miss focusing too far down the road,
    For now, let’s just be right here where we are and go from there,
    Forget what all these success gurus and mentors are saying and whatever all these successful and famous people said they did before they got to where they are.

    We have our own stories to write let’s not plagiarize anyone’s life of success and live right where we are.

    All I’m saying is for now let’s focus on one foot in front of the other and see where we go.

    Jahnari A Nicholas

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    • Wow, such a powerful piece within the honesty of life broken up into moments. I could feel the emotion as I was reading and enjoying the relatable journey. Thank you for sharing!

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  • Roses shared a letter in the Group logo of PoetryPoetry group 1 weeks, 1 days ago

    Cherry Blossum Cheeks

    Have you ever let your mind sit under a cherry blossom tree
    The poetic renewal massages the stress away the same way as the beach waves
    Copy and paste, lying next to you is like closing your eyes under the sunset oceanside
    A bright blushing sky with kisses of orange, and blue with a honeyed taste that simply grabs you
    But nothing is as sweet as your sugar, under the shade of this suite
    Fresh chill of a neutral setting is cooked by our body temperature
    Peace in the reflection is bringing us closer
    When I look back at how we arrived at this destination within the calm ripples I see a truth in the tomb of love at first sight
    Our photograph under the light being born from fallen petals is a coveted site
    I had to see the treasure I already had instead of searching for gold
    That’s when our story began to unfold, I hate folding clothes
    I rather unfold and devour deep conversations over shallow beverages
    She likes easy ice, but I want more, as deep as the roots of this tree
    The ying and yang
    Discovering the ocean intricacies when it closes its eyes to dream and wakes up with a kiss complemented by a southern twang
    She’s my main thang, calling my land line
    Our language reads between the lines
    Wrinkled with age or bitten white chocolate sheets
    I love seeing your cherry blossom cheeks
    p.s. you be the pink and I’ll be the red for Valentine’s…

    Roses

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  • Cortney Valle shared a letter in the Group logo of ParentingParenting group 2 weeks, 1 days ago

    How I lost my kids and was called unfit wrongfully

    Hi in 2021 I lost my children because my mother didn’t want me to leave state with them. My mom was jealous of the lifestyle I had vacationing and loving on them. I never once put them at risk never left them alone. I had made arrangements with their dad to keep them for the week in summer so I could go to Maryland. My children were never going and my mom somehow my whole life has always weirdly found her way into my relationships and my business. Cps said nothing was wrong, the house I lived in was mine I worked off a while new roof cleaning for a company and also had money Into it. What I didn’t know is hidden cameras were everywhere. I am loved by everyone accept my family mom In particular. I helped a homeless couple and they were gone when we had our court hearing but she still got them. I’m pretty sure Mom paid the judge. No one can understand why she took them but she tells everyone I left, I left after weeks of fighting to keep them. I went through hell literally for the past three years. I went to d.c. to try and petition it that’s. Ajoke there was a 18 mth wait. I then went to Maryland and got sex trafficked it was horrible. Came home to Michigan no housing so I went to Texas. I worked at goodwill and Mercedes Benz. I made good money and sent school stuff and cash up to my children. I came back to Michigan and got a small place worked at a grocery store then met a man that I married.im finding out things from my family’s history as we speak. Apparently there’s a whole family in Indiana we feud with and they paid this guy to marry me. And it goes all the way back to me and my marriages. My family feuded with this family and this family casted witchcraft on me and hired a hitman as well. It all goes back to my parenting my mom didn’t like that I parented the right way with love and respect . Her way if love is money and material things. So why do I not have them currently? I can’t even get unmonitored visits when I had a car. She absolutely tried to make me hit an all time low and give up. How can I give up those are my children. Now I am lucky if I go to a sporting event once in a blue moon. The judge also without me present gave her full custody said she needed In surance my children all had I surance at the time of removal. There’s a lot of shady things going on and I am very upset about this. The government is aware thankfully so just pray for my family. I need a house big enough for the four of us . The situation is so complex I can’t cover it in a short story it would take a few books. Much 💕

    Cortney valle earth angel

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  • Sherry Noble shared a letter in the Group logo of Mental HealthMental Health group 2 weeks, 2 days ago

    Learning positivity

    Dear Unsealers,

    I am a 36 year old woman and wife to my 39 year old husband. My husband was diagnosed with primary progressive MS in 2013 the year we met and also got married (when you know you know!) At first the only visible sign from the outside looking at him was his gait and poor balance, he always appeared to be drunk when you watched him walk. From his perspective, he could no longer see out of his right eye, which became permanent, he was retaining urine which was not safe, he was having a hard time doing his job which involved using his hands and fine tools due to neuropathy like symptoms. Now he uses a cane and a walker and takes medication for spasms in his legs. Now he has also bein diagnosed with major neurocognitive disorder which is a basic open term for dementia. I am his caregiver with the help of a home health aid 12 hours a week. Neither of us expected to be in this position when we met in January of 2013 and married that September. It progressed rather fast and more than likely won’t stop. My husband has a great attitude though which is amazing for him, and so hard for me sometimes, I’ll admit. Sometimes I want to talk about everything and cry, but he already pushed it out and doesn’t think about it like I do somehow. He’s teaching me in his own way how to be more optimistic and less stressed over things you can’t control. I have my own illnesses, mental illnesses, that flare so to speak when I am stressed and it’s helpful to be with such a strong person. Sometimes I don’t know if I have it in me to be a wife and a caregiver to the same person at such a young age; then I think about how we’re helping each other out in different ways I just forget to see it that way, the way it is.

    Sherry Noble

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    • Sherry,
      I just wanted you to know your letter about your husband has encouraged me to always look on the bright side of things, and except people for who they are (including conditions). You do have it in you to continue taking care of him, and your honest transparency letter proves just that. Thanks for being a good friend.

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    • Your husband sounds like an amazing human! And you sound pretty amazing and loving and wonderful yourself. May each day bring you both as much joy as humanly possible. Sending a hug your way. <3 Lauren

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  • Oswald Perez shared a letter in the Group logo of PoetryPoetry group 2 weeks, 3 days ago

    Welcome, May!

    Dear, Unsealers:

    It’s the first day of the month of May.

    April seemed to go by quickly. As one does when they participated in National Poetry Writing Month.

    The calendar resets for the next thirty-one days. Spring is in full bloom.

    With the opening day of the month being a Wednesday, I welcome the month by way of haiku, an imperfect one…

    As the fifth month begins
    Thirty one new days arrive
    A welcome, to May!

    Oswald Perez

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  • Jahnari Nicholas shared a letter in the Group logo of PoetryPoetry group 2 weeks, 5 days ago

    No todo el amor es igual

    In life, we say I love you,
    Many won’t mean what they say.
    In poetry, we say I love and then we take you somewhere further than outer space.

    I say I love you to many in many different ways,
    Love is too complicated then dares to never make sense.

    There are so many ways to love someone only real love could understand the rest.

    I love her as my Nurturer,
    An artist who molded the most beautiful clay,
    The momma bear whose cubs never starved a day.

    I love him as my Foundation,
    The cement of my soul when the tides of life wash the rest of me away,
    The tesla of my heart he made me the light on your darkest days.

    I love him as my own heart,
    The fragile passion none could ever corrupt or dethrone,
    The hero to my sidekick for as long as he lives I’ll never let him truly be alone,
    He looks out for me, I’m his almost clone.

    I love her as the earth loves the sky,
    Sometimes she is my shade,
    Sometimes she brings the rain,
    Sometimes she may be the storm,
    The mother of the artist,
    She is the vision that the masterpiece was made for.

    I love him as my mentor,
    The flame of my candle when lost in the dark,
    The script to the play when I never had a chance to practice my part,
    The man behind the blueprint to a better-built heart.

    I love them as my brothers,
    A bond close to kin,
    Should they never question my loyalty,
    We save each other from our sins.

    I love them as my sisters,
    A love to fill a void of the things never had,
    A love to protect and be vulnerable when things are good or bad.

    I love them as family,
    The kindest faces the ones we have yet to meet,
    The only love that times has yet to defeat.
    An impossible connection that defies the very ground beneath your feet.

    I love her as the moon
    Her love is my sun
    No earth in sight,
    A connection stronger than the deadliest spider web none has ever spun.

    I love her as her escape
    No interest in whether she deserves peace,
    I’ll be her chance to just run away,
    If she goes too far or finds herself lost,
    I’ll love her as her return
    For things that need her most could never recover from such loss.

    I love them as their comfort,
    I place they can be safe,
    I’ll be their pillar until they need a pillow,
    I’ll be both for them on my best days,
    I’ll also be their discomfort because growth won’t happen any other way.

    As for myself, my love is a Thorny mirror
    For the things that I feel are a reflection of what I serve.
    A taste-blind chef with intentions of shaking the world.
    I love myself in a place of solitude as the one who hates to love alone.
    I’ve been so far from where I was I forgot that I’ve passed where I wanted to go.
    That’s what happens when aren’t looking ahead.
    Now I just want to be bonded with the dream I’ve always had love for a gamble on a shooting star.
    Memories of the longest chapter I’ve ever written so far.
    Love for the one who always gets a page no matter what chapter I’m on.

    Jahnari A Nicholas

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  • Timothy T. Willett shared a letter in the Group logo of PoetryPoetry group 2 weeks, 5 days ago

    This chapter # 5

    Today is the first day of the rest of my life,
    Therefore, every next one I’m in-is a new chapter.
    Every morning, I wake up, God’s mercies to me are new-
    So, with on my heart, His daily touch- I am able to prove…
    That I love Him, that I am thankful-that He is the only One able
    To mold and strengthen my life, because it’s so easily breakable.

    Just one more day to prove-how much for others I will lose.
    And know that my tears for others are real,
    Because always for the next person, I’m to lift up-
    I’ll lose if they can gain, the Master of the universe to me explains…
    That He was there always, and is there forever-
    He has placed His Word inside of me. as the greatest Treasure!

    A time to be married to my beautiful wife,
    A time to live with my kids,
    Time and again to prove my life is (for others) to give!
    A time to know, a time of notion
    A time to grow in the fact connection,
    That helping others build, is in-tact protection.

    A chapter to heal with the faithful “Unsealed”
    Understanding (unworthily) I have been blessed for real!
    whether I look back, or pierce through ahead
    Life is still permanently on track, my life is hid-my life is dead!
    But that’s a good thing…Because it’s the old life that’s dead!

    It makes me smile as I cry…
    Knowing all the while-my soul will never die!
    Rather in eternity-with Christ is life forever,
    And best of all, while down here on this earth…
    Is to show my schizophrenia has no worth-
    Over the grace of God-that I cling to endeavor!

    As chance and chapter to prove purity-is more dominant than deceit
    With the bowels of the new heart and spirit-God has freely given me!!!

    …Amen

    4-24-24

    Timothy T. Willett

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  • Cierra Jackson shared a letter in the Group logo of PoetryPoetry group 3 weeks, 3 days ago

    The Nimbus

    Give me peaches like burning clouds.

    The vermillion mass of blankets reflects off the Vermilion Great Lakes.

    Like the raging sorrow and disbelief that my heart floats upon.

    Intensity blooms in the latitude as I see you for the last time.

    A weeping willow as I cry under the tree.

    Eyes drooping with rainstorms.

    Nothing more seems to amaze me.

    As the pull of your spirits linger.

    Sunshine beams fearlessly through the hurricane of Venus like clouds.

    “Be as thy presence is gracious and kind” something you would tell me when my mind tornadoes.

    Mind flustered with dazzling memories.

    Lightning over me with your nourishing energy that conveys everywhere I drift on Earth.

    Our compressed bond brings me back to resilience.

    I will always levitate on the sweet joy that you left behind.

    Cierra Jackson

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  • Sonya Eldridge shared a letter in the Group logo of Mental HealthMental Health group 3 weeks, 3 days ago

    Defeating Bi-polar

    Today I have decided to tell my story. I suffer from bipolar. I was diagnosed with the mental disorder over 20 years ago. I have been through alot. It has been a real problem most of my life.
    It was triggered after I had my second child. It was a nightmare 😔. I ended up being hospitalized several times over the course of twenty years. I will do my best to explain the horror of it all. I remember having one episode after another. Each episode was very exhausting and dramatic. I would block out a lot of the different personalities and triggers of emotional dynamics. It was so 😫 tiring.
    I will try to explain one of my episodes to give you an idea of it all. Well, it all begins with not taking my medication. It slowly turns into a horror movie. I hear voices and act out several different personalities in my mind. I begin to have spells of crying dramatically having thoughts of despair. I was on edge and going down a bottomless pit of not wanting to be here anymore 😪. Yet, in most circumstances I didn’t want to kill myself because an angelic voice told me, ” no” don’t do it! I say, “okay” most times. Smh.
    In these drastic times I have family who did help me like my mother. And that was important and fortunate because at these times it is good to have positive support systems in your life.
    In most cases my family would call 911 and have a rescue squad come get me. In this case, I can’t stop crying. I wanted to leave! I wanted to go away! My family would say that I was going to the hospital. My main support is my mother. She was always there for me.
    Once the ambulance 🚑 arrived I felt like I was in a horrible movie. This has happened to me several times over the years. Yet on this particular case the ENT would come in from the ambulance slowly one my one. They see I’m distraught and incoherent. I don’t know who I was at this point. I’m yelling for no reason and crying for no reason. I can’t understand what is going on. The police also came in…and it got worse. They felt like I would hurt myself or others and so one officer threatened to taze me. I said please don’t..please give me some water to drink. They did.
    They slowly calmed me down and then my casemanager came in to also help out.
    They asked her several questions to understand why I was like this. She told them that I was bipolar. I am so sick at this point. I have felt supernatural powers around me. I would say, ” I see angels”. They weren’t really visible but a feeling of goodness and calming voices.
    So this contributes and adds to my psychotic behavior 🤔. That is what I felt.
    I want to tell you the experience of being INSIDE THE AMBULANCE 🚑. Once I get inside the ambulance I felt like i was being ported to an experimental place. I was scared!!!!!This particular personality in me was very informative. I was talking a great deal like I was literally someone else.
    One ENT said that he had never seen anything like this before. I finally got to the emergency room. Once there I begin, to yell and bring attention to myself. The police 🚔 officers were staring at me. A guard was placed at the entrance of my room door. I was being watched for over 24 hours. After a while a psychiatric doctor told me I would be admitted to a room in the hospital.
    Now, I was on the floor of the psychiatric unit. Once I was in my own room I was in a bed. In some cases I was given medication to help relax me and I would sleep for hours.
    So this was a particular bipolar experience. The next day, after being monitored I had to learn and come to appreciate little things again. Showering 🚿, brushing my teeth, wearing a hospital gown, and being served my breakfast lunch and dinner. This was a safe place.
    Once I stayed a couple of weeks I was let go. I had a team of supporters around to help me. I had a case worker, a psychiatrist, and medical doctor coming in to see me. I felt much better. This was going to begin to be a part of my life for over 20 years. It is hard. But I will say I’m currently doing ok. So remember you are not alone. Be positive. Find good supporters in your circumstances. I hope this helps someone. Thank you for hearing my story. I am beating bipolar.

    Sonya Eldridge

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  • You Will Survive

    When you feel caught in a vacuum
    Because people didn’t see the value,
    You brought to the kitchen table,
    Won’t change the fact that,
    You are more than capable.
    Your worth is immeasurable.
    You are very valuable.

    In a world that may seem unstable,
    Don’t let doubt make you retract,
    You have the power to impact.
    You are stronger than you think,
    And you are more than enough.
    You are loved even on the days you feel worse. 


    Keep running.
    Always believe in yourself, don’t hesitate,
    You have the potential to create.
    I know you can do it!
    See, you’re already doing it!
     
    Give yourself grace
    To run your own race.
    If you keep the faith alive,
    I know you will survive.

    -From Reflections of a Hopeful Romantic by Stephanie Anyaoha

    Stephanie Anyaoha, PMHNP (Steph Zion)

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    • I love the strength in this piece:

      You have the power to impact.
      You are stronger than you think,
      And you are more than enough.
      You are loved even on the days you

      I am going to include it in today’s newsletter <3 Lauren

      Write me back 

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      • Lauren,
        Thank you so much for your kind words!
        I really appreciate your support!
        I wrote that piece when I was at a very low point in my life and wanted to give up.
        I hope it will inspire others to keep running their race.
        All the best!

        Write me back 

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