Dear unsealed community,
When I was 23 years old I was living with my parents and 2 sisters in Nanuet,N. Y. My father, who was a chemical engineer, owned and aerosol factory. One night we got a call from the Haverstraw police. My father’s factory blew up in the middle of the night. My father drove the 20 minutes up to Haverstraw at 3:00am to see his building burnt to the ground. Thank goodness no one was hurt.
Unfortunately this event meant my Dad had to find another place to make a living. He was offered a job working for a company in Lima,Ohio. He was going to merge with this company before the fire. Now he was forced to go work for them. This turn of events led to a very scary time for me personally. My parents had to move away and leave me and my sister in New york where we were both enrolled in college.
For the next year I had so much anxiety and felt so sad. My parents were so far away. I missed them so much. I cried every night.
After a year I met my husband Alan. He was very comforting. He understood how I felt because he was very close with his family.He became my safe space.
Talking about my feelings with Alan, who was a great listener, helped to release my fears and anxieties. He even came with me the first time I went to visit my parents in Ohio. After a couple of years my coping skills became stronger and I mentally began to accept that I would never be able to live with my parents again. Time does tend to heal wounds. Having a safe space and person like my husband to support me is a gift I will appreciate for the rest of my life.

It was 12 months into the covid pandemic. It was a very challenging time for the world. Personally, I was struggling. I hadn’t seen my daughter for a year and only saw my son from a long distance a few times even though he lived close by.
Then we started to be feel bolstered by the fact that a vaccine was coming in April. Could this vaccine really change the trajectory of this virus? Could I see my daughter again who was isolated alone in a building in florida? A year is a very long time to to be separated from your child. I was hopeful but frightened.
What was I frightened about? Actually the exact thing that gave me hope at the same time really scared me as well. I wondered. Is this vaccine safe? How would it effect my health, my husband’s health and my children’s health. What would happen when they injected the virus into my body. I had always worked so hard to live a healthy lifestyle. Now I was putting a new vaccine into my body that did not have many years of research behind it. It was not just scary. It was terrifying.
Well the day came when my
husband and I had to drive to Jersey City Medical Center to get that first vaccine. We both were nervous but I decided to trust the scientists and pharmaceutical industry which I have been a part of for the last 45 years. Since Alan and I are older we were getting the vaccine before our children. This turned into another form of motivation for me. I thought I will take this vaccine to give researchers more information as to how people tolerate the vaccine. So we masked up to the point that Alan and I looked like astronauts going into space. We gave the nurse our information, rolled up our sleeves. I started to sob. I cried for several reasons. Sadness for all the suffering covid had brought to the world, fear I was going to die at that moment but most importantly I cried because I arrived at this moment where I found my bravery. I faced my fear took the shot and thought perhaps our world would turn around and we could reunite with love ones. Perhaps we could all live again. My tears eventually turned to joy and pride that day. Could there be a light at the end of this dark tunnel? Well I am here and thank goodness my family is too.

Hello everyone, first this is the first letter I’m posting on this so please don’t be too judgmental lol. Kidding aside, let me tell you a little more about myself I suffered a devastating lower back injury from a car accident I suffered when I was 13 years old. It turned my entire life into a tailspin downward for a decade I was in a wheelchair in severe pain in my lower back and extremities to the point where I needed to use a wheelchair to get to the bathroom in my own home!!!! My social life was non-existent and no Doctors would do anything to help me because of my age. All they would do is drug me and put me in Psychiatric wards and never believed that I had pain, I heard so many times, “He’s a kid, he don’t know pain” so many times I wanted to go home and cry and many times that’s exactly what I did. At the same time I was prescribed numerous prescriptions harmful drugs that had massive side effects and had me throwing up and getting me immensely sick. I spent night after night in various ER’s around the Western New York area including out of the area such as Boston, Rochester and Cleveland but none were willing to do what it took to help me. But I finally found the right Doctors after a decade that felt more like an eternity, after an eleven-hour procedure I can get around, walk, move and actual live life again after watching so much of it go by my bedroom window. I am now pursuing my lifelong dream of becoming a sports play by play announcer and got to spend this past summer announcing games for the Batavia Muckdogs a local baseball team here in Buffalo as I work my way up to one day hopefully becoming a radio play by play announcer for Major League Baseball. However, I am also writing this letter to lend an ear, what makes this community great is that we all bond over the trials and tribulations of life and within that we become closer as potentially friends. During my medical ordeal I thought about committing suicide three different times but I thought no there is a better way. But, I’ve certainly been through my ups and downs in life and I know that sometimes just having someone to listen makes all the difference, so if anyone needs somebody to listen or just needs a friend I’m available and willing to help when I’m not calling games of course lol. But I am here and want the members of this community to know that I am here because I know dark times in life and not just my own physical health, I’ve dealt with alcoholic family members, family members who survived domestic abuse and a lot of other dark and scary and downright sad and messed up things this world can thrown upon a person. And when you get swept up in the darkness, sometimes you just need someone to know you care. Unfortunately, I know how quickly life can change in the blink of an eye. I’ve lost family members to covid and even in my own life, one second I’m perfectly healthy coming back from religion class on a Sunday and the next second I get in a major accident that flipped my life on its proverbial ear. And just the rapid and sudden change of life can be a ton and overwhelming to deal with, I know that feeling firsthand and again I am willing to listen to those who may be dealing with that currently in their own lives and again I am here. Again I understand that you do not know me and I would never ask any of you to share anything with me you don’t feel comfortable sharing. I’m just offering a friendly ear to listen and I think especially with the hard times this world has seen the last couple years whether it be the pandemic, the Russia-Ukraine Conflict, or just flat out life itself I believe we can get through it so long as we all support each other and listen to each other in times of need and great distress. So I would like to extend the olive branch and offer my friendship to anyone who feels the world is against them or they have very little company in their own lives I know what that feels like and if I can help you guys from feeling the almost hopeless isolation I felt for so long then that will make my day and hopefully make yours as well. One last thing to conclude my incessant ramblings, I think I speak for everyone when I say what a wonderful person Lauren is for putting this all together making this forum possible, she has been nothing but kind to me my entire time as a member of this community and I’m sure she has done the same for everyone in the Unsealed Community, Lauren you should be very proud of yourself for what you have accomplished and are accomplishing with this, the world needs more people like you!!!! You are a true angel. Once again, my name is John and I want to thank you guys in advance for listening to my long-windedness, I truly do appreciate it. I know it has been a while since I posted my first letter but I felt given the nature of this community I felt it necessary to offer a potential friendship and just to have another person in your corner when it feels like you have no one. Remember you are not alone and you truly matter, even though life may do things that make you feel that you don’t you do. I’ve been there and that’s why if you need someone to listen I’m here, I’m just a letter away. On that note, that’s it for me for now, feel free to reply or reach out guys if you ever need someone to just listen. I look forward to interacting with you guys very soon. Your friend John Carubba

Dear Lauren,
Ever since you were a small child you were always extremely chatty. I was lucky to be the recipient of your words of wisdom. When you were a teenager I was working in New York City working with some really amazing physicians. I was intimidated by these colleagues that I actually had to teach. I had to give them very detailed information about very strong drugs that were actually controlled substances. I was challenged and questioned a lot by these doctors. I came home worried that I was an inadequate source of information for these thought leaders.
Well those evenings when I came home feeling less worthy of my position, I would tell you how I felt. You were always so supportive and complimentary. Every night you would tell me I was much smarter then I thought and yes you always told me how beautiful I was. You were so insistent that I accept the fact that I was very smart. Growing up I struggled in elementary school. I reversed my letters, had trouble in math and had terrible handwriting. My report card usually had C’s. Nothing to be proud of compared to my 2 very gifted children and my attorney husband. I would tell you all this quite often at night and you would not hear it. That was in the past. You told me I gave really good advice, that I was articulate, a good listener, and was much smarter then I gave myself credit for.
Lauren, I think I have finally found the confidence in myself that you saw in me all along. We all need a cheerleader in our life and you have been mine. I am so lucky to have you and Andrew and Dad in my life to raise me up. So I really always had 3 cheerleaders, but you my dear, with your outgoing personality, had the loudest megaphone. Your positive words are always there in my head swirling around telling me “Mom you can do it” Thank you my dear beautiful daughter Lauren.

Mom

This letter is to my younger self in hopes that she remembers that these events were not done to you that they were placed for you. Placed for you in this lifetime because you are a badass and always come out with your smile as bright as the sun and your head held higher than the clouds. When you tell people of your story you deem it to be normal while others are floored with how it has been for you. You are you for a reason but most importantly never forget that your feelings are indeed valid, do not put others needs before you when you are tired and need to rest and recharge. Remember learning an enormous amount of compassion and empathy for others which is a rare superpower. Once you have recharged and nurtured yourself then you can go and help others. Never regret the help you’ve given others, remember that empowering feeling you get once you do; like you can do anything. Remember to keep going and never stop and when you look back don’t forget to smile because we did all that and then some. I love you I can’t wait to color and go rollerblading.

Dear Margaret Sanger,
Many years ago I was hired as a pharmaceutical representative to sell birth control. At the time, I did not give much thought as to how fortunate women are when it comes to deciding when they will birth a baby. But at some point I got curious. When did contraception become available to women in this country? To my surprise, I learned that up until the 1900’s any mention or dissemination of literature or actual birth control options was illegal. So what did I do? Well of course first I googled, which lead me to read the very interesting biography of the amazing advocate for the reproductive freedom movement, Margaret Sanger.
Margaret, you were so brave to publish the first articles on women’s sexuality in a very candid way. You stirred up a-lot of controversy but at the same time many women also supported your writings. You worked as a visiting nurse in NYC and met women who were performing dangerous life threatening abortions on themselves out of desperation. When one very desperate woman, who already had many children, asked her doctor if there was anything she could to prevent pregnancy he just suggested abstinence. These types of insensitive and unrealistic attitudes motivated you to begin educating women in a public forum about birth control. For this, you were arrested. You were forced to flee the country and live abroad until the American society was ready to be enlightened on this subject. You were so passionate and dedicated to the well being of women.
Margaret, many people do not know you were the founder of Planned Parenthood, an organization that has treated thousands of women, offering a wide array of gynecological services at a very affordable level. You impacted my life because you inspired me and impassioned me to be a voice for those who cannot advocate for themselves. Reading about your challenging journey to provide women with reproductive freedom, I became a better sales representative. You put my heart into every word I expressed to my customers. Those doctors I spoke to went on to provide more viable, safe birth control choices for their patients. You gave me a purpose to my career and a great pride in my work. Thank you, my hero, Margaret Sanger, a liberator for all women.

Shelley Brill
Mother of 2 amazing children Lauren and Andrew Brill

To my younger, I wish I could go back in time and live those childhood moments again. As I got older I realized that those moments cannot be done again, but at the end of the day I lived those moments and had a lot of fun and experienced a lot of things. If I could go back and name a time that I really enjoyed it would be going to the Browns training camps every summer with my uncle and cousins. Being able to watch the Browns practice in Berea was one of the best things that I have ever done when I was younger. As I got older, I started to cherish everything about my childhood and would never trade it for anything. Last but not least, to the younger me experience as much as you can and have fun.

I’m a writer and words have meaning. My Dad was a Marine and for him Action is what matters. I don’t expect him to say I love you, because that is not the generation he grew up in where Men expressed emotions. Yet I know he loves me when he took care of his family and bought me action figures (Star Trek or Superheroes) even when I broke the last ones. I learn from my Dad to be more of a Man who may not always say what he feels but shows it. I’m not going to ever hear my Dad gush with emotions and I don’t need to.

He didn’t say it when I was a little boy who wanted to make movies and he’s not going to say it now.

Paradoxically, I do use the words, “I love you,” but only if I mean them and I have did some action to show it is how I feel. I’m not going too much into my personal life though. I do that by writing characters and using fiction as a basis for truths I have found in life.

I have found some use “I love you” to manipulate others and their actions are the total opposite of Love. In writing and researching crime stories, I find Women and Men who have been abused verbally and physically by people who constantly say “I love you.”

So as the son of a Marine, I will say, if someone really and truly loves you, they won’t have to say it. You will know it.

Oddly enough one of my friends likes to compliment me in what can be called paradoxically jealous. He said, I was fearless.

The circumstances was I went and talked to someone while he didn’t. Often times I strike up conversations with people I find intriguing. I didn’t want anything but just to say hello.

My Friend, on the other hand, puts a lot of thought into how things benefit him and tries to make calculations on whether it is worth it to meet someone new.
I didn’t see it as being “fearless,” but just being friendly. I explained this to my Friend who didn’t get the benefit of saying hello to a stranger. Although I just decided to take the compliment and keep being fearless (friendly).

I told my Friend, sometimes you just have to do nice things and not want anything in return.

I told him a story from a movie “The Fisher King.”

ly saw a man alone and in pain. And he asked the king “What ails you friend?” The king replied “I’m thirsty. I need some water to cool my throat”. So the fool took a cup from beside his bed, filled it with water and handed it to the king. As the king began to drink, he realized his wound was healed. He looked in his hands and there was the holy grail, that which he sought all of his life. And he turned to the fool and said with amazement, “How can you find that which my brightest and bravest could not?” And the fool replied “I don’t know. I only knew that you were thirsty”

Hey Guys!

I decided to introduce pen pals in groups of four. You can also add and write to anyone in the community, but this just breaks the ice a bit.

So @johncarubbagmail-com @zaysmith1 @polok12 @prelude2cinema7 all say hello.

To break the ice, share with each other the best compliment you have ever received. One of my personal favorites was from a friend from Buffalo. She had a lot of issues with the guy she was dating at the time. And when I was leaving she wrote me a card. In it she said, “Whenever I have to make a strong decision in life, I think of you.”

I was so touched. Another favorite came from a man who was blind. He said, “Everyone keeps telling me that it’s too bad I can’t see because you are really beautiful. But I don’t need vision to see that you are beautiful.”

He was saying I was beautiful person.

I can’t wait to hear your stories!

You guys can start a new letter/new thread in this group or any other group. You can post your letters on your social media and decide whether you want the letters to be public for the world or private for The Unsealed community.

Thank you for being a part of the family, and I hope you guys enjoy writing to each other. If you have any questions, I am always here to help.

I love you all,

Hey Guys!

I decided to introduce pen pals in groups of four. You can also add and write to anyone in the community, but this just breaks the ice a bit.

So @sarita @lisaferreri21 @vcalero @jfritz all say hello. You are all strong and courageous people with stories to tell.

To break the ice, share with each other something that made you proud during the pandemic. Maybe you learned something new. Maybe you realized you were stronger than you thought. Perhaps you opened yourself up to making new virtual friends or maybe you started a business.

When the pandemic hit, I thought The Unsealed would unravel. I thought no one would sign up, and I wouldn’t be able to afford to keep going. While I was scared, I decided to step on the gas, even more, using the extra time at home to work harder and reach out to people one by one.

During the pandemic, I built enough of a foundation to get it to where it is today (which is still in its infancy, but it is a start). I am really proud I didn’t give up. I am really proud I pushed myself. I am really proud that I fought as hard as I could when facing fear, and I was blessed with all of your support.

You guys can start a new letter/new thread in this group or any other group. You can post your letters on your social media and decide whether you want the letters to be public for the world or private for The Unsealed community.

I can’t wait to read your letters and why you are proud.

Thank you for being a part of the family, and I hope you guys enjoy writing to each other. If you have any questions, I am always here to help.

I love you all,