Dear Daddy,
My earliest memory of you was getting a goodbye kiss in the morning before you would go off to work. I would have my head on the pillow and you leaned down, gave me a kiss on the cheek and say I will see you tonight. I was the oldest of 3 girls so I had some special alone time with you. For example, when I was about 8 years old you took me to work with you. It was very exciting to spend a whole day with you and have you all to myself.
I have so many beautiful memories because I was blessed to have you for 66 years. Not many people live to that age and can say they still have their Dad. Well I am older now and I have lost you and it now there is a void in my life.You were always my sweet daddy. The man I looked to with love and admiration. I am so glad I was always able to express to you these feelings. You are the reason I am, what I consider, a good person.
Well life goes on. My children are older and are very good people. They are both hard workers and have good hearts. I have a grandson now. Thank you for giving me so many opportunities in life. You worked hard for your family and your sacrifices are appreciated every day. I was given a great blessing to have you as my father. My loving daddy Calvin David Kalstein, my WW2 navy hero.
Love, Your forever adoring daughter,

Dear Grandpa,

It’s been nearly 25 years since I last saw you, and what I remember most about you is how you made me feel. Whether at dinner on the holidays, playing cards, or sitting in your living room telling stories, you lived with a joy and zest for life that was so effortless, natural, and contagious.

Growing up, you were very athletic, just like me. So when I would tell you about the plays I made or the goals I scored, you’d say, “That’s my little athlete,” knowing I got my athletic prowess from you. I was very outgoing as a child, telling a stranger my whole life story within the first five minutes of meeting them. Since you were not short of personality at any point in your life, you’d always say, with a grin, “We know where that one came from.”

When I was around you, I always felt like you loved and believed in me and were proud that I was your granddaughter. Grandpa, you always made me happy, and you always made me smile.

For many years, you had health problems: diabetes, cancer, and heart problems. During the fall of my first year of high school, you had what felt like your 10th heart attack and passed away the Friday after Thanksgiving. I was devastated. Your death was the first time I lost someone close to me. But I pressed on.

For years, you told me the rain was good luck. So, to cope, I looked for rain to stay connected to you – a way to know you were still there. Sure enough, it rained on the day I graduated from high school. On August 15th, 2012, which would have been your 85th birthday, I was offered my first full-time on-air sports anchor/reporter job. It was pouring outside. And more recently, when I met my boyfriend, who treats me so well and makes me laugh, I asked what his name meant. When he said he didn’t know, I looked it up. His name means the God of Rain.

With all my heart, Grandpa, I believe you are watching over me. You know I became a sportscaster, and you love that I started a business that advocates for kindness, courage, and equality. You are so overjoyed about the quality of my new boyfriend’s character, and you think it’s funny how my dog doesn’t let anyone within three feet of me. In fact, I think you may have something to do with that.

So more than telling you that I miss you or even that I love you, what I want you to know is how you made me feel when I was a little girl is how you make me feel now.

Thank you for still making me smile. Thank you for still making me happy.

Love your little athlete,

Dear Mom, Here is what makes our relationship special.

I am not the only person in the world who thinks they have the world’s greatest mom. But I am the only one who is right. There are so many reasons why you are a great mom. Growing up, you showed up at every dance recital, soccer game, graduation, and field trip. You did my hair as a little girl, even though you had to chase me around the house with a brush and a bow in hand for 20 minutes to do so. You took me to The Plaza for tea time and to restaurants in the city for lunch dates. And you have supported every dream I have ever had. While I cherish all those moments and memories, what really makes you the best mom is that you have never let me cry alone.

In my worst moments, Mom, you have always been there to listen to, encourage, and give me advice. As a little girl, when I was upset about school or a boy and couldn’t sleep, you would sit in my bed and talk to me until I felt better. To this day, when I am sad or stressed or just need a friend, you are my first phone call. From my first breakup to my assault to the passing of my ex-boyfriend, you have held my hand, wiped my tears and. And somehow, you always make me feel better.

Your warmth, consistency, and wisdom make you a cut above the rest. And as a result, I move through life feeling very loved. You make hard times more bearable and good times more meaningful.

I am so lucky to have you, the best mom in the world.

I love you with all my heart,

Your daughter,

Hollie,
I know I’ve said this one before, but it is Mother’s Day weekend. So, I figured I’ll say it again.
Sunday marks Mother’s Day. Without mothers, none of us would even be here. Most of us only have one mom. If we’re lucky, we come across women who become a person’s second mom.
You’re my second mom. We’ve rooted each other on and prayed for one another when we needed it.
Thank you for always being in my corner.

When I moved here, I didn’t know myself. I certainly didn’t love myself. I don’t like to think that it took losing you for those things to happen, but I know that for a long, long time, you were my only trans friend— or you and your husband were, until you both died, the same night, in one another’s arms, nine years ago. I know that when you died my own trans baby was only five and still becoming an idea of a person. I wasn’t ready to face my grief over you or any grief over the trauma of my past. I felt like motherhood was the only way I could survive being trans and alone in the world. And then, their little hand tendrilled into mine like a vine and they came out when they were seven. When I fought for resources for them, I found a way to get a little of what I needed, too. Mateo, my friend, my confidante, my comrade, my dreamer, my laughter, my spark, I feel like you would understand these dark times we are facing right now and how much I miss you. You gave me permission to find warmth in the sunshine, roots in the earth, solace in the water, and breath in the air. I took this winter to grieve you and your husband, and so many other people and moments I have lost. I am planning now on how to take the rest of my life to thrive. I feel at peace in this way, this moment before the bloom. I feel so much gratitude for how your life gave me life, always. You did not fight for any of us in vain. I still wear gold shoes and black eyeliner, for you. Always love, always the trans flag and the chin up. We do not have the luxury of shame. I believe in us.

Dear Ralph,

You don’t know me, but I hope that you will get some comfort and love from a stranger with these kind words. Too often we ask children to carry too much, things that they shouldn’t have to carry. Then we facetiously shove the badge of “resilient” onto their lapel. While you most definitely are resilient, you shouldn’t have to be, and your strength came from responding to a stolen innocence at a heavy cost. I see the news stating that you are a wonderful child, an exceptional musician, and a caring brother. And while these qualities are very important to who you are- they don’t speak to you as a human being that didn’t deserve this. What happened to you was wrong on every level and our community should not be making excuses but should be comforting and holding you with our love and sitting with you through your journey to healing.

My heart cries out for you and your family and I hope you understand that you are not at all responsible for any of this. I hope you continue on with your passions and goals. I hope you don’t allow the evil of others to poison your soul with jadedness. And above all else, I hope you live fearless.

With Love,

Dear Angela, Mollie, and Mary Beth:
I’m so glad that we’re all friends with each other after all these years. While our paths crossed at different times when I was at YSU, I’m glad I got to know you just the same.

Angela, you were my co-worker in the Office of Marketing and Communications. We’d talk about this and that pretty much every day. You made me realize that I wasn’t too hip for the room when I was at YSU. You are, and always will be, awesome.

Mollie, you’ve always been most cordial to me. When I found out that you were going to be part of the Youngstown Press Club, my first thought was “Let’s go! I want in!” It was the best decision I’ve ever made.

Mary Beth (MB), what can I say about you that hasn’t already been said by me and your other students? Simply put: You are the best professor any YSU alum could ever had.

Lastly, I consider all three of you as my honorary moms. I love you all very much.

Dear Erin,

I remember the beginning of freshman year of college being worried about if I would be able to make friends as good as the ones I had at home. My naturally shy self wanted a place to fit in and longed for friendships that would be lifelong. Though my floor and I bonded well, I didn’t always feel like I fit in or that my friendships were as deep as I wanted them to be. That is until I met you. We bonded well. Our friendship continued through sophomore year. At the end of my sophomore year I knew I wanted to room with someone different, but didn’t know exactly who. One of my “friends” suggested that we room together. That was probably the nicest thing he ever said and did for me. I asked you if you wanted to room with me and was delighted when you said yes. Little did I know that rooming with you would lead to a lifelong friendship, lots of laughter, and a feeling of family.

We are so different. You are outgoing and extroverted. You start up a conversation with waitresses/waiters, cashiers, and random strangers on the street. You always have the cashier ring up your groceries so you can interact with them, while I rely mostly on self-checkout. I love to joke that you are my emotional support extrovert, as I am shy and like to keep to myself. You are a night owl and I am a morning person. You are from the city and I live in the middle of nowhere. We complement each other very well. What I admire most about you is your confidence, your strength and your ability to overcome adversity. Though you’ve been put through the ringer many times with school and health issues but you always bounce back. People may misunderstand your beautiful heart but it hasn’t seemed to dim the love you have for yourself (and I mean this in the best of ways). We’ve spent many a night laughing together, crying together, had epic photo shoots together and stayed up late talking about the men we like, and the boys we can’t stand. Ours is more than a friendship. It’s a sisterhood. I know that no matter what you’ve always got my back, and I hope you know I’ve always got yours.

You have a zeal for life that is unmatched. You make even the most mundane things fun. You don’t hold back or hide. In a world where people try to be anyone but themselves, you stand out for being authentically yourself. You radiate with joy and uniqueness and it is beautiful to see. You encourage, inspire, and provide a place for me to be my authentic self and I can’t thank you enough for that. I love you girlie and I can’t wait to see what memories we create this summer.

You are one of my best friends and I have no doubt that you will one day be my bridesmaid.

With love & admiration,

In the mid-15th century, you invented the printing press, thereby beginning the spread of the written word across Europe and eventually around the world. As a person who makes his living on the written word, I along with the rest of the writers the world over, want to thank you.

In modern times, we have social networks on the Internet, enabling us to communicate with our friends and family instantly, even if they live halfway across the world.

Everything has to start somewhere. For the spread of the written word, the starting place was the printing press. Technological advancements have enabled people to read books electronically.

If you were alive today, you’d be amazed at how far the written word has come. Thanks for all you’ve done.

Dear Dad,

I can’t remember the exact day or even the precise year that this memory took place. At the time, I was working for MSG Varsity, a high school sports network in the New York metropolitan area. I was probably about two years out of college and maybe 23 or 24 years old. That job was a breakthrough. It was my first steady on-air job. Before getting an offer to work for MSG, I must have been rejected by 100 stations. I was pursuing what many thought to be an impossible career as a TV sports reporter. So many naysayers told me I was wasting my time and my education. But not you, Dad. You told me never to give up on a dream. You told me you believed in me and tried to provide any resources possible to help me succeed.

That’s why this moment, which I am about to share, meant so much to me.

See on this day, I walked into work and everybody was buzzing about Emmy nominations. I was a young reporter in the number one market in the country, so my expectations were low. Then, just as I was about to start writing a script, one of my coworkers told me to check the Emmy nominations. They said they were almost sure they saw my name listed. I don’t remember if I read a hard copy or if I looked at the nominations on my computer or someone else’s computer, but I got a hold of the list, and sure enough, my name was printed twice. In my first year as a reporter, I received two Emmy nominations in the number one market in the country. Before saying anything to anyone, I went into the stairwell and started to cry as I called you to tell you the news.

That’s the moment that is etched in my memory forever. That’s the moment I will never forget. I remember how I felt overwhelmed with emotion and how I could barely even get the words out to tell you. I remember how happy you were to hear the news and how you told me to stop crying.

It wasn’t so much the recognition from the industry or that I got to go to the ceremony and wear a pretty dress that made that moment so special. Don’t get me wrong. All that was great too. But at that moment, I felt I had proved that your unwavering support and belief in me were worthwhile. That you didn’t waste your time or money investing in my dreams.

A decade and change later, I have yet to win an Emmy, even though I was nominated five more times after that. But that moment in the stairwell means more to me than any trophy. That five-minute phone call celebrating with you and hearing the pride in your voice were and are the only prizes that ever mattered to me.

I love you, Daddy. Thank you for always believing in me.

Not a Second Apart

Not a second apart… born 1lbs and 13oz, you were there with me from the second I was born. You were there when I was first put on oxygen — not getting to see where I lived until Three months after May 23, 1996.

You were there when I first cried through those doors, it was you who lifted my head, letting me familiarize myself with what must’ve looked like a jungle… our house; a place you saw just a week before the Jewish holidays.

You were there when I had my first seizure at 2… the same time I was diagnosed with CP, which must have been somewhat of a bitter-sweet moment…after all those doctors I went to, or should I say we went to.

You were there when I first rolled over – which must have seemed like the first night of Chanukah, not knowing how many candles (activities of daily living skills I could do or how many key milestones I could reach).

When I wanted to go to college, it was you that I confided in and we made it through, fast-forwarding to now, when I timidity crawl through the process of finding a job, it is you that always reminds me, to keep being you, no matter how awkward you walk… never stop running to your dreams and jokingly or not jokingly saying, “ if you fall, you know how to get up!”

You are me and I will always love you!

Jake

Dear Mrs. Shuster:
Even though it’s been close to 13 years since I left the halls of Lakeview High School, but you are still my favorite teacher of all-time in my academic career. When I was just eight years old, you introduced me to The Rich Center at Youngstown State.

When I was 10, I was moved to your classroom and enjoyed every minute of it. Several years later, you moved to the high school. At age 15, you had a front-row seat to my pimply adolescence and saw how advanced my sense of humor became.

Around all of the fun we had, as well as going through the trials and tribulations of surviving high school while on the autism spectrum, you and I became family.

I could just see how proud you were of me at graduation that spring day in 2010. You are the best teacher in Ohio, and I consider you my honorary mom.

You’re the best, Mrs. Shuster! I couldn’t have made it through high school without you.

Dear Mom,

Growing up, I didn’t always appreciate you as I do now. I didn’t fully understand you as a child because our dreams were so different. At ten years old, I was outspoken and already very career driven. You always liked working and wanted to do well, but you never had a burning desire for a promotion or more responsibilities. For a long time, I thought you were less ambitious than me, but as the years passed, I learned that that’s not exactly correct.

Mom, you are the backbone of our family. When a crisis hits, you are the one we all turn to for comfort, support, and wisdom. You have this incredible ability to calm us all down while providing logical advice. When I got rejected by my crush in elementary school, you were the one who sat in my bed and told me I was beautiful. When I decided to go to private school 40 minutes from our house and then play for a travel soccer team 40 minutes away in the opposite direction, you (and dad) spent hours in the car, driving me back and forth. When I was worried about getting into college, you were the one who told me you were proud of me regardless of which school accepted me. When I opened up about my assault, you were the one who told me my response was normal and OK. When my ex-boyfriend passed away, you were the one who held my hand at the funeral. And when I started my business, you spent days on end sending out emails for me.

Mom, I have come to realize that you were and are very ambitious. You wanted, more than anything, to foster a loving family and you did whatever it took to make that happen. As a family, we have endured difficult situations together, and you have handled each with strength, grace, selflessness, and love. Every day, you have made our family a priority. To this day, you help us persevere through the most challenging moments of our lives, while also supporting us as we chase our wildest dreams.

Mom, you may not have wanted to be a boss in a boardroom, but you were/are one heck of a CEO in our household.

I am proud to be your daughter, as I admire and love you more than you’ll ever know.

With love,

MIKAELA LAUREN TICK!

I WRITE A DAY LATE. YOUR BIRTHDAY was yesterday: LITERALLY, I AM a DAY LATE.

On July 27, 2014, you passed, PHYSICALLY; it was a rare HEART CONDITION. YOU HAVE A RARE HEART. A golden HEART. Check that, a 💜! (your FAV COLOR) and an attitude akin to an 🐘 with its tusks ⬆️. You had those up EVERYWHERE

EVERY SINGLE PERSON feels a DAY LATE, A DOLLAR SHORT occasionally and it was those moments that you INFUSED YOUR SMILE to LIFT THEIRS UP!

That SMILE FEELS PRICELESS to EVERYONE; it IS PRICELESS EVERY MOMENT OF EVERY SINGLE DAY, FLOWING WITH GENUINE and PURE LOVE no MATTER WHAT, BUT, LIFTING people’s TUSKS up is YOUR SUPERPOWER!

YOU LITERALLY took the OCCUPATION out of OCCUPATIONal therapy: VOLUNTEERING at St. Mary’s, and ALWAYS HOLDING HANDS with EVERYONE!

KALS LOVES HOLDING HANDS -especially for people with DIFFERENT ABILITIES: Camp HELPING HANDS is where it started!!

So PLEASE put YOUR “HAND IN THE JAR and give ANY AMOUNT of MONEY AND/ OR TIME

LY, ALWAYS!!

Until we meet again,

🐘 ⬆️

Jakey!

Credit: Picture from MLT’s Instagram Page

Giselle,

I remember the day I met you
I know you do too
I was lost looking for the cafeteria and I saw you

That day was the first day in my new school as a freshman coming in midyear. I had nine more inches of hair, a bunch of metal in my mouth, two less teeth, and a shyness so natural to me I would never speak up in class (or dare to make a noise in a quiet room). But, something that day made me talk to you. I asked if you knew where the cafeteria was and that I was new. You said

no

You said

you were lost too

The best thing about this story is that we found each other when we were both lost. This may sound dramatic––and it kind of is––but I was truly lost in that point in my life. I was lost in this big city with no friends, no direction, but as God had it, you were new too. I’m so grateful for you. We grew with each other, laughed with each other, cried with each other, danced with each other, and we did all this knowing it was always meant to happen.
I don’t think I was me until I met you. You made me more bold. You gave me strength. When I was down about my talents that one day junior year and thought I had nothing going for me, you made a list of everything I was good at. You decorated it with your vibrant colorful pens, and gave it to me with a speech. I still have that list today and I’m still so grateful for it.
You always made me feel worthy and you have always grounded me. No matter how different we are, you have never judged me and always had faith in me. I know I would be a much different person if I never experienced your kindness, or never rapped the song Mona Lisa with you everyday on our way to school, or never cried with you over facetime because of IXL, or never graduated with you, or never asked if you were lost that day too.
You are the one person in my life I know I will never have to live without. Thank you for always being more than just a best friend to me. Thank you for being my life’s soulmate and my sister I never got to have.

Your forever person,
Braya