If you truly think about it, life is like butter.
Starts out all vigorous like the stick of butter you use to bake that cake.
As you start to live and achieve your goals and dreams, it will start melting away.
Of course, there are those small pieces that take longer to dissolve.
Those are brief disturbances along the way to achieving your goals and dreams.
Just think about it for a minute.
Life is like butter, melted or not!

Darkness sheds across the skies, place some in your pocket and never say goodbye
For your walls are so thick you can’t even see
You’re too high strung to unravel like me
It’s ok, because I like to dance alone, it keeps me grounded, balanced, pure and tone
Am I fake? Am I phony? I don’t think so honey
I’m not in your space anymore and you’re not in mine
Like fragments in space, lost for all time
Maybe one day we will make up for it and you’ll be mine all mine
Thoughts, memories, clouds in the sky
Planes, buses and trains flying by
Bugs, animals, funny jokes, and little pokes
Heartbreak is painful, and this we know…
Whatever you do, don’t let it dim you’re your glow
You’re here for a reason, by now this you should know
Time to sit back, catch up and let your spirit grow
Don’t mourn, don’t cry-just remember my eyes
I will always be around when you least surprise
The stars are wrapping up for the night, and the birds are entering flight
Get some rest my dear, everything is going to be alright

I made a wish for you and I
Slow dancing to Mazzy Star
Under the crescent moonlight
High off of your woodsy cologne
Drunk off of your tender kiss
A winter night of endless bliss
A touch of whimsy
A dash of wonder
A recipe for love
No longer do we need to wander
Our destination is clear
We’ve found our forever
We’ll fade into one another

Ascending flying high
Never wanna come down
Getting higher with the winds wings
Extended gliding with the air gusts
Levitating to new heights angelic & poetic.

People ask me why I smile. I usually say, “I can’t help it,” or “That’s just me.” However, I smile because sometimes I want to curse. I want to tell people off in ungodly ways. I smile because sometimes I am nervous and don’t know how to articulate my feelings. It becomes my natural defense to ease the anxiety I am feeling in my body. I smile because I was never taught how to address a situation without screaming or yelling, so I don’t want to cause a scene. I smile because a thought pops into my head that I know I shouldn’t say out loud, so I tell it to myself, making myself smile. I smile because I don’t know what else to do other than to put on a mask and be happy, to mask my feelings, to cover up my thoughts, to ease my pain, to be someone who lowers the tension. After all, who will get angry, be offended, or say something negative about a smile? So, if you want to know why I smile, it may be a litany of reasons, so you tell me why you think I am smiling because most times, I honestly don’t know. 

If we are to walk by faith and not by sight,
we must overcome fear with all of our might.
Knowing that the most high does not give us a spirit of fear
we stand on to the promises of Hope we hold dear
Being a conqueror is not for the selfish or weak
With each guided step it is strength that we seek
For this world is full of tribulations and trials
We must be overcomers of life for awhile
and keep on living strong as best as we can
Loving ourselves and others across this land
Standing up to injustice and evil with heart
Shining our light in all places to overcome the dark
Speaking the truth and Standing on divine faith
our voice must bring change as the world may break
We will solider on together with our heads held high
We will experience choas in this world until our spirits meet the sky
Yet together we must face and confront our fears
As we gather in fellowship to help wipe each other’s tears
For we are all spiritual beings living a physical life
We must have courage when dealing with obstacles and strife.
We shall overcome and this too shall pass
We must tell ourselves these affirmations to last.
We can’t conquer that which we don’t face
And sometimes fear can have its own place.
But fear is not a space for us in dwell in
We have places to go and people to pour in
There is no failure in The Most High after all
So Warriors pick yourselves up and answer the call.

a journal on humility
who are you when you have nothing? when you allow yourself to break and sit in emptiness? who are you when there is nobody to motivate you, push you? who are you when it’s just you in a dark room working through battles? how many times can you get knocked down and still be the same person at your core? do you stay true to who you are or does life’s battles turn you into the worst version of yourself? when do you allow life to turn you cold? or do you? do you stay soft, embracing the vulnerability, the rawness of our humanity?

training for a marathon has changed my life. and I’m sure that has been said over and over from others who train for marathons, but I think I have a differing perspective. I started running not knowing I could even run a mile, but I surprised myself with two miles and decided to keep pushing myself to do more. I fell in love with the process and wanting to start gearing my training towards a goal: a marathon. as someone with asthma and vocal cord dysfunction, I knew I would have to adjust in order to complete this hefty task of a marathon. it isn’t easy to relearn how to breathe. and since I have taken on this intensity of training, I have seen some really hard days. the kind of hard days that remind you of your humanity. running through below freezing temperatures, running half marathons on no sleep, running any hour of the day or night, running through stomach issues. all of that will keep you humble if nothing else in life has.

I started seeking humility. seeing how much I can brave through. how tough I really am. and part of that is trauma I’ve accrued throughout life but part of that is finding joy in struggle. finding joy in accomplishing things that are seemingly impossible in the beginning.

I’ve learned as long as you have yourself, you can push yourself through anything. training for a marathon can be so lonely. you learn how to motivate yourself. how to take care of yourself. people may not understand when you have to wake up extra early, run at 2am, miss nights out drinking, squeeze runs in, cancel plans to run. you have to be committed enough to the goal you’ve set to be there for yourself- when nobody else gets it, you will.

my dad always said that as soon as you claim yourself to be humble, you are no longer humble. and I’ve been walking the fine line of staying humble and attaining a great deal of pride. pride is often seen as negative, as one’s hubris. someone who is too prideful comes off as a bad person, egotistical. I wish not to be egotistical, self-centered. that’s why I do the things that will bring me back to my roots, humble me. ground me. it’s grounding to struggle four hours through a run and still make it out. tough conditions like freezing rain will remind you that you’re human. where is the line? I feel as though when we are prideful in a positive way, confidence exudes from us and inspires others to take on an insane task too. pride can be contagious, in a beautifully impactful way. on the opposition, humility can be taken too far. as the man who is too humble knows not their capabilities- they will live in a state of comfort.

I like to live in a way that reminds me I am human- being human is a beautiful thing. when we live in a way that is comfortable, we go blind to the simple facts of the world. we forget our luck that it took the universe to bring us here. we skate through life and allow it to be as is. that’s why we ought to strive for toughness. strive to conquer our fears. strive to live in discomfort, often. they say comfort kills growth but really, the growth never started. the lack of acknowledgment of who we are will keep you out of touch with the world. it’s special to be able to feel attached, in tune with the world. to be reminded that we are a product of the universe. and as easily as we were brought here without knowing, without asking, the opposing could happen. we could disappear from the physicality of the universe.

that’s why it’s important to be reminded of your humanity. as we ought not to go through life forgetting how special it is. not everyone was granted today. use the day. too many people allow it to pass. why would you waste a day not everyone was given? to be so selfish is the opposite of what it is to be humble.

so I run, I train hard. I put effort into my mind, body, and/or spirit every single day. I give myself love, a lot of times tough love. I take advantage of the sun, I chase it, even. for the sun only comes out for so long, to bring us warmth and remind us that even the simple gifts are to be enjoyed. the sun comes and goes to remind us of the impermanence of all things good. that things need to experience darkness to appreciate the light.

that’s part of running, experiencing some serious darkness and tough times in order to reap the benefits. some runs you have to be brave enough to tough it out. teach yourself to stick through hard things. how to show up for yourself when everything sucks. how to remain in touch with the world. how to stay grounded. how to not let pride overtake. as my proudest moments have come from the other side of darkness. pride is a direct product of struggle.

those who allow themselves to be humble, to experience struggle and pain achieve a level of pride that is earned. you earn pride. if pride is displaced, that is where is forms into ego, cockiness. only when pride is deserved will it come off as humble. only then will others be inspired by the feats you took on, conquered. until then, maybe you’re full of it. maybe you need to be grounded somehow. most people do. but it’s all part of walking the walk. embodying the things you strive to represent. identify with.

imposter syndrome and the dunning-kruger effect rival. as some feel undeserving, unaware of their capabilities. and some lack self-awareness to the extremity of believing they are invincible, in a way. unwarranted confidence versus lack of confidence. and, somewhere in-between the two, you might find someone who knows struggle, who finds there way through it. who deserves the pride they exude. that is true confidence, humility, humanity. the coexistence of the best and worst parts of yourself. acknowledging the parts of yourself that are weak. being proud of the parts of yourself that are strong. learning what it means to be human.

Dear Unsealers,

As I write this post, it’s 5:45 AM on January 1st. Daybreak hasn’t happened yet.

But the smoke has cleared from last night’s celebrations, and blue skies appear.

I hope that 2025 is a good year for all of us. A year that’s filled with all the joys and minimal difficulties.

To that end, this is my welcome to January and the year itself:

At midnight on New Year’s Eve
A new day, month, and year begin

365 new days have arrived
With renewed optimism and joy

A reminder for 2025 and beyond…

Every day is a wonder to behold
Be the light that spreads out into the world

Wherever your pursuits lead
I’m cheering you on all the way

For the days of Auld Lang Syne
A toast, with all the cups of kindness yet

I wish everyone, everywhere
A Happy New Year!

Another physical year
About to pass on.
This leap year
Flew by,
Seemed
Like. A Hop, Skip & a jump,
I guess some of us needed
That extra day.
See you next February 29th.

The tree is still lit,
the walls are adorned.
We celebrated the day,
our savior was born.

The gifts are all opened,
The presents are done.
The family dinner,
is now left-overs for one.

Everyone got home,
safe and sound.
There’s still a few shreds,
of wrapping on the ground.

The house is so still,
everything is quiet.
I can hear my heart break,
amid all the silence.

I already miss it,
having my family all there.
The sound of their laughter,
filling the air.

But life must go on,
the world keeps on spinnin’!
I wish it would stop,
or slow down for a minute.

Going back to work,
feels somewhat surreal.
Coworkers are great,
but family is real.

One thing I’ve learned,
as I’ve gotten older;
The worst part of Christmas,
Is when it is over.

I will stitch a world from my verses,
Sewing these words of confidence into your hair like flower crowns of daisies.
To join these joints into sockets that would complete rivers.

This isn’t the story of Pangea.
It’s the tale of a seam unbroken,
Where each chain stitch holds together pieces of pain and hope.

A prick of sorrow, a stab of truth,
Threads unraveling, yet I sew them anew.

Binding scars into patterns, weaving triumphs through the cracks,
Every loop and knot a map of survival—
A tapestry of me, of you, of us.