Why do I love myself?

There is that saying how can you love someone if you can’t love yourself?

Then again.
It has me thinking.
I love my family.
My friends.
Inanimate objects.
My creativity.

But at one point I was an afterthought
I spent a good part of my life.
Truly not loving me.
Liking myself never felt honest, real.
Didn’t feel worthy.
I never really drew too much stock of the idea of loving me.
And deep within I thought it was just enough.
Going through life. Being just blah
Giving parts to myself, to people. Who I didn’t love.
Just because I could. It was easy.
I was doing things just to make others happy.
While it didn’t make me happy.
I lost myself in the process.

Once I truly stripped myself down. To the core of me
That’s when I began to accept the fact that it’s OK.
To ask for help.
That. it’s OK.
To set boundaries.
Learn not to settle.
Be honest with yourself.

My Sadness
My Darkness
My Scars
The hopes I have.
The wanderlust of my mind.
Fully understanding of who I am

I began to love everything that is me.
I begin to see this light that I dimmed down for so long.

Then the realization hits that loving yourself is one of the best feelings in the world.
From now until when my time is up
I will always love me.

When I think of the things in my life that
I am grateful for there is so much
But one of the things that comes to mind
Is a person

When I think of what a best friend she is what comes to mind

People hurt you
They disappoint you
Make you disbelieve

When the truth is right in front of you
You have to see it for what it truly is

And that is gratefulness because to understand the importance of
a good person, good friend

Can be once in a lifetime

To find a soul mate in a friend
Is special

To create a bond of trust
To share honestly
Even when I don’t like it
But it always ended up needing it

A pair of misfits
A lifetime of laughter

Silliness
Sadness

The good and bad and everything in-between

Joyful
Thoughtful

Weirdly unique

No matter what always there

I love person and I will forever be thankful
To call my friend

Dear Teenage Self
There are many things I wish to tell you. You need to ask for help it’s not a sign of weakness or failure. Everyone needs it now and then. My young self I know you need it. You were never a burden you are loved. But you have to start loving yourself by accepting your complexion you are a black woman who needs to own it and your hair may be a pain but it is yours. Learn to work with it you will learn to love it. Don’t let people convince you any differently about Who You Are. Deep down you truly know don’t shy away from it. Of course, it is scary and unsure but you need to be bold.
Friends will come and go some friends become more and that will break your heart but it will mend again. Stay true. Let love in even if it doesn’t last those feelings are something worthy of experiencing. You go through trials with your friend but in the end, it will make you both strong and set healthy boundaries. You also be gifted a friend who will hold you down when you need the most. These two hold a significant value in your heart don’t be afraid to tell people you love them. Allow them in you won’t scare them away.
You hold so much within gotta learn to let it out. Regrets have been had that is okay hold on to those. But move forward and try not to have much more in your life.
I need you to be strong. I need you to be better at procrastinating. Follow your gut and that damn heart those two come hand in hand.
A couple of reminders you are a black beautiful woman. Dress however you see
fit. Date who you wish to date whether man or woman. Stand strong in your convictions always be you.