Dear Flower Girl,
Love is the warm mud
your ran through
with bare feet.
Love is woven
in the synthetic threads
of lavender silk.
In the weedy bouquets
you would leave
on neighbors doorsteps.
Sticky curls chewed with baby teeth.
How time-out was just more time
to daydream.
And when anger shook the house,
your magic made cupcakes
that shrunk you down
to hide in photographs with safer strangers.
Your tawny flesh could melt into the earth
Disappear inside a circle of mushrooms.
And all the angels and Fae would whisk you away—
the way the dawn exhales over the dewy mist
is the way your innocence wrapped you.
Immune to hatred
Blind to greed
So tender to the saplings and baby-things.
As if all of nature was a mermaid’s mirror
and you wanted to help everyone
with synthetic threads
and warm mud.

Dear Fair Maiden,
Love is the adhesive
that binds the heel
to your platform.
In the body beneath your tube dress.
Skin so fertile
moss could sprout from your pores.
Your flirty laugh
others would glance at;
sensing it
like expensive perfume
Smells wet and hot.
You teased them all
Made them squirm.
Teetered in the twilight
between summer and autumn.
Between playtime and foreboding.
A mysterious temptation
all apex predators grow into
from being wild for too long.
With a fickle, feather-light weight
dancing from
one shade of red
to the next.
Leave a trail of black pepper and rose and
breadcrumbs of lovers
who search for your shadow
under their pillow.
As if trying to catch a clever crow.
Even your evilness is love—
those fearless talons dig into life
squeeze the prey out of everything.
Remind them what life is.
Leave them panting.

Dear Medicine Woman,
Love is the taproot
that spreads and sprawls
below your feet.
The deep network of
your steadfastness.
Down
with all the centipedes and mycelium.
In the heart of the earth
where goddesses are born.
You are one with it all:
daughter, maiden, mother.
How her joy bubbles with
mineral baths and
songbirds in December.
Each is a present
she graces you with.
Every spark celebrates
the brilliance
you’ve become.
I cannot love the earth
without loving you
The womb of the universe
in every breath you draw.
Brave and beautiful
Wise as willow
Bear the harvest full of fruits
Use your mortar to make medicines
Turn little girls to flower girls
Give the mountain to the maiden
and spread the seeds around your home.
Cradling her young
Forgiving her shadow
Delicate as lace and strong as oak.
Sweet lady, I love all of you
Until love is shown in the bones of your hands
and your skin is dust.
All that is forever—
the reminders life is kind,
the lessons love is hard,
the bouquets on the doorstep,
the hearts that churn at night.
From the baby-bud
to the ancient tree—
and all that’s in between is
the gift that is you.

Is it considered taboo to want to research the very parts of me?

A primordial sphinx on the hunt for freedom.
A rainbow warrior with the glow of a fire fly.

I wanted to see the world and be the difference ever since a child. I couldn’t find the words to express but I knew deep down this life was far bigger than you and I.
Society wants to chain our mind and keep us bound, but I reject that notion through the shield of mirrors. There should be A level of quiet respect to the highest form when the ancients make thie face appear in the rising skies above.

Not a heavy soul can grasp the magic of this love for self, it’s a ripple effect to the elect .

“They deem it selfish” Only because boundaries were set after unmasking the strings of lifeless puppets due to Geppettos scheme.

As a child it made my insides scream but now I’m back as a Samurai ready to cut the veil as I snatch my voice back !

Cause Regardless I will stay poised. Like wind chimes with a silent sound , a rhythm pumping through my veins harmonizing sweet grace.

I AM urbane.

I will not settle for less than anything I deserve. If I’m honest it’s true to say there were many lessons learned. My heart became open the more I got stabbed in it.
A shock to the sight. An implosion of a madriasis to a gapping Truth . The hurt we experience as a poison we ingest
Most tend to glorified as they justify with that same unchanged behavior. Triggering an unstoppable velocity of the most gruesome Mary go round with acceptance like a token of appreciation to the repetitive cycle.

It’s scary

Those red flags tingle on the inside like a ping pong shaking my electrical receptors alerting every meridian as I raise my fist in deflection.
I’m Sensing your bullshit underneath that trench coat of shadows you wear like the latest fashion coat .

So Mote it Not to be

So yet again I denounce that decree. Cause for so many years I’ve shed many tears for the joy of kissing happiness.
My Celibacy amplifies my potency to having that .
I find it easy to Disarm the ego of the shallow man.

Through every mirror I walk past, when I look into my own eyes I fall deep
No succubus or strays I deserve the real thing.
A beauty that desires the same love as me, the same beauty that when I look at HER, I see me .
The more I say no to the world outside the bigger the battle comes to oblige.

No worries, “Why do you think Arch Angel Michael carries a sword at his side?
I Just close my eyes and quantum leap. As The Angels heal and protect me, while i sleep”.

I’m On a psychic voyage , navigating through intuition. Writing down my dreams that are often a premonition
I’ll cut that cord within the quickness, calling back my energy if it brings me discord, as i recalibrate.

There shouldn’t be a war between two worlds based off my decision to walk away as my will is free.
Its my sanity I’m protecting and my heart I’m cleansing from the past of a treacherous journey .
These years of silence helped me through my mind as I roamed the inside like a tomb raider.

Removing those chains , picking locks. Warring to denounce those words these dark guardians spoke over me to forever be shackled in hurt ignoring Gods knock .
Even though the little girl was Drowning in tears, she was guarding my purity from the start .
-A captor for my love, a wise old wizard at heart.

She knew the struggles and the Abrasions they would cause, but never even to this day would let me die without basking in the ambience of heavens poetry.
it’s a schism

Like A war of the hearts

… “The fire has got to cease”
( I smile as I listen to the beautiful Sade Sing)

There is enough grief in this world as is.
I’m tired of battling THERE schizoid antics through covert tactics that over time made me walk further away from the beautiful parts of me.

After so many years of searching and finding it took 33 years to find me.
My battle scars are these dark circles under my eyes . Saying “ I love you Ashley, it’s about time we found you in I .

Like hidden scrolls I dove deep inside cement walls just to access these very parts of me. Of course there’s more to come for my life in the now is just the beginning of my true self.

(This is why I love myself )

Note to the world of readers and writers:

“There is a series of major lessons that must be learned each life time, one is the walk within. Boldly choosing the shear beauty of seeking the love of self, beyond a stellar dream is the key to your heart,… YOU are the key to your own heart. Once you choose you, everything meant will fall in line too ❤️”

My dear Lorinda, here’s to you
Some words of praise I feel you’re due

Too often quick to criticize
Much less likely to emphasize

The abundance of kindness, love, and grace
You thoughtfully grant those in your space

And opposite your gentle side
You’re a lioness who protects her pride

With fearless strength and fortitude
You don’t back down from any feud

I’m proud of the human you strive to be
And know you’ll continue to work on me

So, just like mom oft says to you
I love you so, Lorindy-Lou

Dearest vibrant, beautiful, magical Sofia, when I first laid eyes on you, I instantly felt and saw the kindness, strength and grace you hold in your being. It would be my greatest honor to be given a chance by you to stand in the divine masculine role of protector and support to you. I long to know you deeply, and to consistently show up for you in a way that fully allows you to be in a state of love. My strong hands eagerly anticipate your he moment our fingers intertwine. I vow to you, my beautiful wise love, that I will be ready for you, and I will bring my authentic self to our divine union. I can feel the love I have for you expanding and I so look forward to helping you o create a healthy and stable family dynamic for your children. I want to be a healed male presence in your and your children’s lives. I can’t wait to take you on romantic dates and magical vacations. I really love your parents, especially since they brought you into this world. I am so glad we connected in the right place and time. I love our life together. My love for you expands infinitely, I look forward to being with you soon my love.

Dear Gerald,

Loving yourself
is like putting a warm blanket
to shield me from the brutal cold
that’s eager to enter my place
and take over my space

but my increased self-love
from above
inside my mind
reminds me
to protect the warmth
I have inside my vessel
and keep my heart alive
from those who wish harm and hate
to crush my mental state
and conquer me

like a conqueror wanting new land
to bring his/her band
to rule in sinister ways
and cause darker days
for the conquered

self-love
is a must for us all
to stand tall
in the face of adversity 
that will persist to threaten our peace
and try to cease
the love 
that we worked hard to keep
for ourselves 
and show others the way
to love themselves all-day

self-love is a non-stop process
that we must maintain to have success
in loving ourselves 
 On your self-love journey
I wish you well
so that you can have a self-love story to tell

This may come as a shock to some,
Maybe not to all but,
I’m just now learning to love myself.
Was never taught so
I am just now,
almost 21 years on this earth
Learning to love & appreciate
Me.
This past year has taught me
So much about myself.
About what I’ve let slide,
Underappreciated, taken for granted.
Even up until the very night
The clock struck 12.
I don’t know what has come over me
These past couple months
But
I yearn to know more about me.
Instead of looking at my life
Through a 3rd person lens,
Puppeting around with no mind,
No control.
Epiphany after epiphany
I step more and more into the position
Of living my life as I please.
Doing things that I’ve convinced myself not to.
Leaving when I’ve had enough,
Saying how I feel as soon as I feel it.
These are the things
That say “I love you”
In many different ways.
I am still learning what it is to
Prioritize
Me.
But it feels too good not to.
I’m becoming comfortable with the fact
That
Not everyone is going to be happy with me
All the time.
That
The sky doesn’t fall forever.
That I am the one living my life
All I have is me,
Why put myself through things
That I don’t see for myself?
Why struggle?
What more can I get?
What more can I have?
I have always craved more,
I’ve just always been too afraid
Of the pain
Of shedding skin.
Of change.
I love that I’m learning to hear my intuition
More clear.
I love that I’m doing the things that make me anxious,
In a healthy way.
I love that I am learning to speak my mind,
Regardless of what the other person may
Think or feel.
I love it all.
A retired people pleaser in the making.
I still have long to go,
But the journey feels too good already
Not to finish.
I have all my life to learn
More
Different ways
to love me.

Thinking about my goals for the new year makes me crouch in my seat when I should sit up straight proud because I got there

my brain BURSTS mulling over ANY AND EVERY GOAL so I take this time to look at them as a WHOLE

What do I have to do to complete this puzzle piece that is comprised of EVERY SINGLE GOAL

Being CONFIDENT and PROUD of what I have done should give me all the reason to continue to strive for SUCCESS this season

There is truly no reason why 2024 can NOT be a BREAKTHROUGH season

As I invision proceeding and SUCCEEDING in life the reason I haven’t had my break through moment is easy

My potential is like the AIR you can NEVER have too much to spare

I don’t dare to prepare to jump into the limit-LESS air BUT I am AFRAID of that STARE or smile that will inevitably be there (at least according to ME) to COMPARE

If I dare to run the race that is LIFE and I WIN I will FOREVER WONDER if crossing that finish line FIRST was FAIR

I think about EVERYONE ELSE who CAN be there

Most certainly the guy with the limp is NOT supposed to be there (or so MYSELF thinks)

But I tell myself if I do NOT run the race (LIFE) like I BELONG it will only be UN-used air and WASTED air just means in the end I did NOT care and I MYSELF CARE

So in 2024 I DARE to jump INTO MY limit-LESS AIR!

Another 1st of the year
Another round of
“”resolution-ists’ bullshit”

Another set..of another pair..
Of numbers.

No, no. No more numbers.
Just the year of
The More and The Less-es.
The Simples.

more kitchen ballet dances.
less quiet cries.
more lyrics that get ya
less of the ones
that were used..
simply to manipulate
you.
more ‘look how far we’ve come’ s
less ‘i’m supposed to be so much further’ s
More of the simply Simples.

More–
“i’m sorry i hurt you.”
“i’m here if you wanna talk.”
“we can get through this.”
“how can i help?”
“it’s gonna get better.”
“thanks for having my back.”
“i got you–always.”
“you’re stuck with me..”
“–promise?”
Always.

–xoxo A

The expectations I set forth
Will allow me to light the torch
To a productive and successful 2024
Far beyond my imagination
This is the year of fulfillment
This is the year of new beginnings
This is the year that my consistency pays off
This is the year my dreams are my reality
My destiny awaits
I cherish the days of people saying
I always knew you would
I always knew you were talented
Not that I need the recognition
But I would be grateful that they were paying attention
I’m ready to enjoy the talent I was blessed with
Sharing it with the masses
I’m ready for my creativity to be heard
As well as read in the pages of my 1st poetry book
1 of my biggest goals this year
Is to release a body of work
That represents me before I turn 40
This is the year
This is the year I dreamt of
This is the year that it all happens
Ain’t nothing going to stop me but me
That’s why this is the year of endless possibilities!