The beach is my favorite place
I walk to the farthest end
You know, where all the jagged rocks meet
All pointy and eroding from the storms the sky sends
I climb those rocks until I find the perfect bench
I sit down to look at my view

My grandmother’s favorite beach is called Coco Beach
It’s in Florida, her favorite state

I imagine there’s coconuts everywhere
You have to keep your head held high so you can keep watch

WAIT

That same line can be used for life

Anyways
My Lela and I sit on those rocks together
We watch the sunset
It goes from pretty blues and whites to a beautiful cotton candy sunset
The wind is the perfect temperature, the perfect strength

We take deep breaths together
So deep we taste the salt from the ocean

We name things we see in the stars
I update her on every detail of my life since she left
We laugh
We cry
We curse
We yell at the sky

I tell her my new memories, the ones she knew I didn’t remember
I tell her my new perspectives of the world, of my life
I show her all my wounds in my back from everyone who swore to me they loved me

She gives me a massage
I feel the familiar feel of her gentle hands
I feel all the love through them
My eyes tear because I missed that feeling so much

The sky is turning orange now, light slowly rising up
The winds start picking up
Lela grabs my face so firmly but still so gentle
She squeezes and says to me, into me

“I am so beyond proud of you. Your wounds are nothing but warrior scars now. Symbols of battles you won. Reminders of all you can withstand. Now go fight some more, you may fall or slip, but you have proven to always to get back up.”

After the warmest, tightest hug she disappears into the big rush of wind
7 seconds I stand there
Embracing the last bits of her presence

Now I’m awake, my eyes crusty from tears
But my heart is so full and warm with hope and love for life
So heavy
But also so so full
And my soul is at peace