There will be times when thoughts creep and crawl
And eventually, turn into a brawl

But we are the souls of many
The news it lies, we come from plenty

Even if our backs are turned
And bridges have burned

Choose to love like the stars above

You are not so different from they and them
You are the same as he and him, she, they, zi and zir

Do not let your mind be stirred
Your heart is large and pure

Be firm in who you are
Love ALL and choose not to fall

You are mightier than the willow’s roots
And the stained army boots

That sit and wait if we do not hurry
To change the world from visions blurry

To light skies & lullabies
That children can finally sing

With their parents hearts still ringing
A loving call to soothe their dreams

So I say to you if anything
Always choose to love

And embrace like singing doves.

Living your authentic self is being true to who thou art
True to your core and true to your heart
True to the real you that dwells deep within
Not to the opinions of others that try to seep in
For you are the one living THIS life
Claim it, own it, and let it take flight

Place high value on the qualities that make you special
Standing tall in your truth as you own what is yours is your vessel
Embrace the differences that set you apart from others
Apologize not to those who act as your judges

Meeting the expectations of others is par for the course
Why not stand for what you truly believe and use your voice
Genuine, real, certified, and true
All are qualities that authenticate you

Portray your authentic self
It should be as natural as taking a breath
You weren’t meant to fit in a box constructed by others
You are you
A one-of-a-kind and like no other

Love Yourself First

In the stillness of the morning light
A whisper calls out to me, serene and bright.
To love yourself is where you start,
For healing begins with the heart.

A cup waits, waiting to be overflow,
But first it must be filled, as you know
With kindness, patience, and tender care,
A vessel brimming, beyond compare.

The depths of self, the soul’s embrace,
In this mirror’s gaze, find your own grace.
When storms of doubt come crashing,
Remember the beauty that lies within.
Like a phoenix rising from the ashes gray,
Let your spirit soar, come what may.

Heal those wounds, tend to your scars,
For every tear that falls like rain,
Gives away to blossoms, bringing beauty from pain.

With every step on this winding path,
Prioritize the love and embrace the laugh.
Where you nurture your own hearts delight,
Your glow ignites the darkest night.

Imagine a world where loves the thread,
Stitching hearts together, where hope is spread.
One act of kindness; a smile, a touch,
Can cripple through lives because it means so much.

So fill your cup, let it brim and slow.
For your heart, the world will know
That self love isn’t selfish, it’s the start
of a chain reaction, a unified heart.
Let your spirits sing, of the the joy self love can bring.
Spread this message, let it be heard.

My name is Charles, and I’m a 35-year-old single father and U.S. Air Force veteran living in the Midwest, USA. Throughout my life, I have suffered and watched those around me suffer greatly. The anguish of my life came in the forms of abuse, neglect, mental illness, poverty, and later, failed relationships and addiction. These experiences taught me a lot about life that I had been ignorant of, and had I realized then what I’m about to explain to you now, I believe my life may have had a different trajectory altogether.
I spent many years in my early twenties lamenting my childhood and shaking my fist at all those who had tormented me. These kinds of negative ruminations led to chronic anxiety, depression, and substance abuse issues that would nearly destroy me. It caused me to hate myself and to hate all of you. I wish I could say I had some sort of grand epiphany and my life was fixed overnight, but that isn’t so. It didn’t come quickly, nor was it easy. It looked more like prolonged physical and emotional pain stretched out for more than a decade. But slowly I was drip-fed the wisdom required to maintain a decent existence, and I hope to share that with you here.

First and foremost, I came to realize that I had no other choice but to forgive those who had mistreated, betrayed, and persecuted me throughout my life. Not necessarily for their sake, maybe not for their sake at all, but to alleviate my own misery. It became apparent to me that, in their absence, I had become my abuser. It was I who was continuing the cycle of abuse and perpetrating it on myself. So, the first thing I would like you to know is that forgiveness is key. Regardless of how much it hurts, you must forgive your antagonist to reconcile your past. Then focus on the present moment and remain there as much as you possibly can. Don’t wallow in the past or create anxieties for the future. Use all your senses to be present in every way imaginable. There is only one moment, and it’s this moment right here.

Then we must realize that the conditions of our lives are a direct reflection of our own choices. That is, if we make good decisions now, it will produce a good life for us later. A life in which we have the freedom of choice and the opportunity to be of service to others. If we spend our lives making poor choices, our lives will be self-centered and only concerned with fixing the damage we’ve done to ourselves. This seems so very simple and, on the nose, yet it can be one of the hardest things to incorporate into your life. Especially with the tug and pull of emotions when you’re tangled up in other people’s lives and subject to their needs and desires.

Lastly, but most importantly, you must try to understand the perspectives of others and always act in kindness in everything you do. We are truly incapable of understanding what other people are going through at any given moment. We can’t fully understand who they are, the customs of the culture they come from, or what kind of pain they are grappling with, but we can try. We can try to be patient, we can try to be understanding, and we can try and open our hearts to allow for moments of compassion. The characteristics used to divide one another are illusory and of little significance. We only need to act with kindness and approach situations in life with an open mind. We should never allow television or social media to twist our minds and lead us into hating our neighbor. Because we are them, and they are us. So, dig deep and find the strength to treat one another with the same love, respect, and empathy that you wish to receive. Because we only have each other.

29 pulchritudinous years
Wasted time on unheard fears
Wasted time on grinding gears
Added time to feed the tears
29 pulchritudinous years
Tasted fine with codependency near
Tasted fine with no boundaries to wear
Faded thin with no care
29 pulchritudinous years
Placed love to replace the fear
Placed angels on grinding gears
Padded with trust to feed the care
29 pulchritudinous years
Allured the soul to ditch the ego
Peculiar faces turned evil
Familiar souls bonded, covert
29 pulchritudinous years
Holding close those who spark the anima
Molding those lacking kindred
Loving life, mind body & spirit

I see you mama dog
Your bones like rails
Showing through your skin
So frail

I see the neighborhood
Giving you food
Because your owner is up to no good

They try to help
Within their comfort zone
But they will never understand
Their actions make you feel so alone

I see you mama dog
I know your pain
I know what it is to feel everyone
So oblivious to your shame

I know what it is to have people
Care for you during the day
But at night when you need them the most
They are far away

Did they know?
Did they just shut their waspy eyes?
Abuse is a fine topic to discuss
Unless it happens from family lust

I see you mama dog
I know what it means to be afraid
Of the person
Whose job was to keep you safe

No one knew
Or wanted to know
How he screamed and controlled me
So I would be the most perfect to show

No one rescued me when
He said I needed to watch what I ate
As I needed to lose weight
As he wanted my body in a coke bottle shape

No one was there to steal me away
When he came uninvited
Into the bed where I lay
They didn’t think his morals were THAT misguided

They asked me if I was ok
They stood outside the door
But they didn’t recognize the feeling
Of being caged in fear on the floor

I couldn’t leave
He controlled me
I had tried to go and came back twice
As I rather know where the devil will be

The childhood trauma was so intense
My brain shut it out
Until his death

I don’t wish this shit on anyone
Not even the devil
As having flashbacks triggered by your
Amazing husband is unimaginable

But I didn’t imagine it. It happened
The others apologize to me and said
They should have stolen me away
That they were happy he was dead

Maybe they say that to make themselves
Feel better
But it doesn’t’ do anything to help
The life long panic attacks and anger

Therapy works
Support works
And love works
To help in healing

But you know what works even better?
Stopping it immediately
So you don’t have to read about the pain in a letter
Or a poem by the victim who is seething

So have those talks
Say something when you suspect any type of abuse
For the victims who go on their walks
Feel more alone and stuck in a life they didn’t choose

I see you mama dog
And I will do my part
To steal you away from that rotten log
Of a Man who doesn’t know your worth

Why?
Have you not read this poem?
Because I rather deal with the consequences than
Spend another sleepless night knowing of the abuse

You continue to ask why?

Because no one saved me

Hello World, did you know Love is sacrifice?,

Fifteen, alone, afraid you’re going to break.

Love is Sacrifice.

Car seats, Diapers, formula too, these holey shoes are great!

Love is Sacrifice.

Rent’s due, school supplies ooph, “oh man, you haven’t ate!”

Love is Sacrifice.

Swing shifts, softball games, there’s no time for that break.

Love is Sacrifice.

Flat tire, prom dress, no money left to cover these greys.

Love is Sacrifice.

College Fees, battered knees, she’s going to do something great!

Love is Sacrifice.

Boquet’s thrown, back alone, man, it’s getting late.

Love is Sacrifice.

She’s back at home, the time has come, a truth she must relate.

Love is Sacrifice.

He’s on the throne, you’re not alone, Mom it wasn’t fate.
He gave his son, for you and I, Grab on and don’t be late.

Love is Sacrifice.

Because of your prayers, I’ll meet you there and boy won’t that be great.

Love is Sacrifice.

Let go Mom, the Lord has won, go into heaven’s gates.
Thank you, God, for your son, who died and made a way.

Love is Sacrifice.

Here is a message I would face death for-
If I could deliver it to an open-minded world.
Whereas Christ came to save sinners like me,
Of whom I beg to differ-that myself is the chief.
Four times Gospel=Good News
A spiritual hospital for souls with the blues!
Exciting, Vibrant, Exploding Truth for you…
No matter who you are-it applies to you!
He tells us how to be safe, to be free!
Jesus’ own words, “Come follow me”.
heavy loads made light-shining in the dark of night,
He has the same path for all-come to His Grace for Life!
Telling Perfect Truth from beginning to end,
Though there’s no such with Him-He is eternal Friend!
Let Him, let Him, let Him
Remove doubt, strife, and fear of things-
With Him you can/will be happy to win,
Watch Him fulfill your every dream!
May take some time-Relationships grow,
He (Jesus) is the Perfect One to know!
And knowing Him is Perfect Peace,
Not knowing Him is no Peace at all-
Because He is the Prince of Peace to all!
Never can any take His place-
Come for Salvation, where all our wrongs are erased!
…Yes-Jesus saves!
I’ve learned a 45 year lesson,
At Camp Neosa as a kid,
But I was a mad kid-
I’ll bury my treasure in the ground, said I…
Could not this message that I hid-even give a try?
It is Perfect-will not trespass any,
And those who find it are not many.
So share we will-the Living Water spill…
Into the souls-so thirsty drought-
Sharing saving faith-to receptive hearts on route!

Then never can the dark prevail!

God Bless you!!!

9-3-24

Dear World,

The doctor told me to slow down some
So I listened to his orders, and, begrudgingly, agreed with him

He said right now my time is short
And only had bad things to report

So I decided to reflect,
What’s most important, but a life with no regrets

Hence, I picked up the phone
Planned a party for all those I’ve loved and known

Gathered up the flowers I once took for granted
Put together a lovely bouquet and called it enchanted

Walked outside to feel the morning breeze and midnight air
Closed my eyes and allowed it to perfume my hair

Danced in the rain with or without music
Played my own melody on imaginary acoustics

Even the former words unspoken and the sentiments untold
I now share them boldly, I no longer withhold

Because time is of the essence
And I count it all as blessing

You see, life has taught me these lessons
Do with them as you please for they are merely my suggestions

Dear world, I’ve had to slow down some
Took the doctor’s orders and, thankfully, agreed with him

Subtitle: Somebody Loves You Baby 💙 ✨

If I had to pick one thing I’d want the whole world to know — above all else — what would it be ?

That — Somebody loves you baby—
So please believe —

That when you look around — you’ll be able to see

That — that somebody — can be found — in many forms, shapes & sizes

That — He Is — not limited — to the only world — you & I both — reside in

Let me put it down for you — in the easiest way — that I know how

He comes in the shape of — a parent, a brother, or a sister

A nephew, a niece, your child, or a stranger

He comes in the shape of — a weeping willow tree
That some how — even with it’s sad — drooped down leaves — can manage to put ur heart at ease — as they sway back and forth in the breeze

Or even — when simply — standing still

He comes in the shape of that blue bird
Who reminds you — of ur loved one — who passed away last year

In the shape of those beautiful — white butterflies — flapping away — at the grave yard

In the shape of that — loyal golden doodle — you tend to feed — way too much

You can find him in the sunflower field — Late September

Or the beautiful sunset & sunrise — Come November

You can see him — in the waves of the ocean — as they roll & roar

As they come to say Hi — before they drift away — once more

I’d want you all to know — that somebody loves you more — than you could ever imagine

But pls — don’t try to fit him in a box — with it’s four corners & think that — that’s it — that’s him

He’s not limited to the highest iq
that can be reached inside our human minds — today

He knows every atom in our body —
The building blocks — from which were made of

We — on the other hand — on this side of heaven
Will never fully know — or understand Him

He’s all beautiful things we see
And — all beautiful things — unseen

He’s all the colors of the rainbow —
& all colors yet — to be named — or made up

He’s the beautifulest language — ever spoken
& All good words — we have yet — to add to our vocab

He’s the Beginning & The End
The Alpha & The Omega
The great I AM — Yah – Weh

He’s all things Great & all things Good

There’s a lot of things — I’d want the whole world to know —

— but if I had to narrow it down & put it down for you — in simplest form

I’d say— this —

The world is not Black & White
& neither — is HE

He’s the creator of the universe
& he loves both — you — & me

But if I must say — just — ONE — Only one —single thing — it’d be ….

Somebody Loves You Baby 💙✨
— please believe …

Death looms all around us
from our first moment of existence,
at life’s coalescence,
it shrouds our very essence,
like breath rides with the wind.
Eighteen funerals in a decade,
remembering those lost lives lived.
I find it ironic it’s called a wake,
since they’re never to awaken again.
Being Earth-side is hard and fleeting,
we’re all just trying to survive
until the day that every single one of us
will eventually, inevitably die.
Accidents and illness,
people vicious and malicious,
aging bodies growing old and weary,
with tired minds and over-worked spines,
usher infinite possible endings
to this time we’re merely renting
animating stories out of our control, really.
So we need to lead with love,
and remember to take care of one other.
A dollar, a meal, a blanket, a hug,
a conversation or sharing some of your luck,
these little considerations
have wide reverberations
that make us humans driven
towards connection and expansion,
a purpose forged in our blood.
It’s the humanity in humanity
that saves us from insanity
and provides direction on our journeys
as we crawl through life in a hurry,
wherein mortality we find unity,
walking each another home unjudged.

Breathe in. Breathe out.

Trust not in where you are going but where you are in this moment.

Life is messy. Life is hard. It is embracing the moments in between. Peaks of sunshine in the shadows. Light and hope in the darkness.

We so easily try to reach for what is easy. What satisfies our cravings. Simple pleasures. An infinite, lasting amount of joy that cannot be taken away.

But sadly, it can in a moment.

Through loss and grief I have learned that life is so much more than living for the mundane or seeking something temporary to satisfy my soul.

I lost my husband in February of 2020, prior to Covid when he passed from melanoma. From diagnosis to when he passed was a blur of three months. He had been sick for a few months prior with no answers and when we got it, it slapped us in the face.

But every day I looked into his eyes and into my children’s eyes and knew that it was in those eyes I would find the reason to breathe. And to keep going.

In the space that followed his death I went through the motions of life. Barely connecting the dots. But I knew that life wasn’t about me. It wasn’t about my loss. It wasn’t about my grief that weighed me down like a thick, heavy blanket after my two young daughters went to sleep each night.

Life was and still is about the moments in between the heavy. It was about the laughter my girls brought me each and every day. It was about the neighbors and friends who showed up for me when I could barely keep myself and my children alive when the world was shrouded in fear of a virus.

It was about long walks and rays of sunshine and music playing and birds singing even when I felt the storm clouds inside.

It was and still is about simple prayers and so much grace for myself from a loving creator who gives me a quiet strength each and every day.

It is about trusting in who I am and where I am made to be. It is about knowing we cannot plan for circumstances and that life rarely turns out the way we expect it to.

But even when we find ourselves buried under the weight of it all, that doesn’t mean we can’t find hope in the very moment we are afraid of. There is beauty if we open our eyes and our hearts to it, but we have to let it in.

Since 2020, I have found more hope than I ever thought possible. The biggest lesson I have learned in this life is to not give up when it gets hard, but to lean into the mess. To know that even the biggest challenges we face are temporary. It is so easy to let our circumstances weigh us down or stress us out. Even when I haven’t seen the way out, I have known to trust in someone so much greater than myself. I have known that I am made for and worthy of beautiful things.

When we trust in where we are, when we open our eyes and our hearts to hope, it is easier to see the gifts that surround us. The light and beauty offered through grace even when the journey is hard.

So let go, my friend. Lean in. See the beauty that surrounds you. You’ve got this.