Dearest little Shauna,
You will become everything you hope, just now how, or when you plan to. There will come a point where you will doubt everything you ever believed in and surrender to the life you never asked for. Your life will be tragically beautiful. However, you will find that spark you lost so long ago on the road of heartache and tragedy, and that spark will create a version of yourself that will be stronger and loved more than you ever thought possible. The little girl you are now will resurface at almost 40 years old and you will finally live your life dream and become a teacher. Along that road, sweet Shauna, when faced with each obstacle, know you are only being prepared for a life you have only dreamt about. You will find happiness, true love, and confidence to follow your dream after years of being told you would never be good, or smart enough. You will meet a man who will heal a heart he didn’t shatter, your love will create the family you had stopped praying for, and you will have the support and strength from a village you don’t know you have yet and will live the dream you have right now. Hold on. Hug your brother. You won’t want to know, but you will regret it. Trust me. Say yes. It won’t end how you think, but he will give you a reason to live when you need it most. Don’t be afraid to say yes again. He is your happily ever after. You are enough. You always have been, you will remember that down the road.

i’d gaze upon the nightsky
watching stars streak on by

i’d toss a few coins
into elegant fountains

i was doing all that
with one thing in mind

a wish that i would cherish
if it would ever come true

but the stars would fade
and day would come

the coins would blend in
along with the other ones

i thought it wasn’t true
maybe it wasn’t meant to be

and now, i no longer wish
i don’t need to wish
not anymore

for i have you
and i’m thankful
that my wish came true

Dear Reader,

While making his first day of school sign for 2nd grade, my son shared what he wants to be when he grows up. I didn’t hear him, and when I asked him to repeat what he had said, I could see embarrassment rise from his abdomen until it flushed his face red.

“Please, tell me,” I told him. Slightly above a whisper, he responded, “I want to be a basketball player.” He felt nervous about saying it out loud. It reminded me of my own stated aspiration close to his age. Growing up near the University of Notre Dame, I stated my desire to attend college there when I was nine. Receiving an acceptance letter from Notre Dame requires significant determination, but my parents taught me to trust my abilities. When you whole-heartedly believe in yourself, you hold power. Empowering yourself, practicing, and working hard become the bricks that lay the foundation of your future achieved goals.

I persevered, and despite people doubting me, I had confidence I could succeed. Self-doubt crept in, as it does for everyone, but I was kind to myself in these moments. “It’s okay, just keep giving your best. Keep trusting you have what it takes,” I told myself. I watched the commercials of young adults opening Notre Dame acceptance letters and imagined myself opening my letter. I cried while visualizing myself holding the mail I’d one day open that would say, “Welcome home.”

It may sound cliché to tell you to work hard and have faith in your potential, but how many times has the world doubted you? How often have you been embarrassed to say your goals out loud out of fear of funny looks or the worry that you’d say it and it wouldn’t happen? What would people think? Would they laugh?

After being accepted to Notre Dame, I wrote my story and shared how I accomplished my goal. My acceptance led to another fulfilled dream: for my writing to be recognized. My writing was featured in “The Secret to Teen Power,” a book that teaches teenagers how to use mindset to achieve the dreams and goals they have set for themselves. The author told me he thought my story could inspire others. I saw one person, years later, say my story inspired her to apply to her dream college. One person means the world. One person means everything to me. Inspiring one more person is my next goal, which I hope this letter will do.

So, I’ll lead by example and share my next dream: to be a published author. I’m saying it now with a mix of anxiety and deep knowing. The fear will arise, saying, “What if it doesn’t pan out?” It does scare me. I imagine your goals scare you, too. But I’ll say it proudly with a shaking voice. Will you state your goal with me? When your self-doubt creeps in, remember to say, “It’s okay, just keep giving your best. Keep trusting you have what it takes.”

I looked into my son’s worried face and said, “Then you’ll be a basketball player, baby. It’ll take effort, and you’ll need to practice daily, but I’ll train with you.”

“Can we practice now?” he asked.

Are you practicing and dedicating effort?

Do you have confidence you can achieve your goal?

I believe you can, and I can’t wait to see what you’ll do.

You’ve got this,
Rachael

You are stronger and wiser than you know
Your thoughts are stalking you
do not queue any hue that’s not meant for you
People’s opinions of you are their own.
You are stronger than you were yesterday.
continue to forgive yourself for not being able to control the horrific actions of others.
Self-love is necessary for your healing.
It is putting you back together whole and true.
forgive any past actions by acknowledging how they have not served you well.
You will continue to trust the process and your progress.
You will not let the fear of being taken advantage of scare you to stillness.
You will stand up for yourself and tell the truth.
You will do it with dignity and respect.
You will be vulnerable even when it makes you uncomfortable.

Hollow

Dear younger Destiny……….. we did it
Thank you God
For this opportunity
The only time feeling empty
Is liberating
Is when you’ve got your own apartment

Hollow
Empty living room
Empty dining room
Empty bedroom
Empty bathroom
Hollow
Hello new space
Hollow
Hallelujah
Hollow
Never felt so good to be
Hollow

First time on my own
Might as well be a new home
I turn over leaves, As they turn over stone
New seeds are sown
No need to raise my tone
Hollow doesn’t have to feel alone

Hollow
Empty Walls
Empty Cabinets
Empty Closet
Empty Fridge
Hollow
Hello new space
Hollow
Hallelujah
Hollow
Never felt so good to be
Hollow

Dear Unsealed,
I have learned so many things about life. I will be 75 years old on September 18, 2024. I have seen it all, the good, the bad, the ugly and still move forward with life for as long as I can live out my life with my disabilities of getting old. My brain works well, but my body has slowed down a lot since I had covid 2021.
The major life lesson I have learned is that I should not let guys talk me into fast romance or marriage or moving in on the third date. That may sound ‘wacky,’ but it truly is more helpful to not be boy crazy beginning at 8 years old. I had my first boyfriend at 8 years old. His name was Eric. He was in my second-grade class. We were friends so I thought, then he broke up with me. I ran into my parents’ house crying like a baby. Mom thought that I was physically hurt. I yelled at her, “Mom, Eric broke up with me. He told me to leave him alone. He did not like me. My hair was too curly. I was so upset, mom, I peed in my pants.” Mom looked at me rolling her eyes, tossed her head back, “My dear child, it’s going to be okay. Eric and his parents are moving to New York City next week. Eric broke up with you because he is a baby too and that is the only way he knew to move without hurting you. You have your whole life ahead of you, Vicki.” I sighed, “Okay mom.”
Growing up in eight decades, I kept falling in love and out of love not learning my lessons. My advice to the world is to continue your education. Do not let a ‘dude’ talk to you out of going to college. Do not let jealous people knock your dreams into the dirt. More than once the person trying to crush your dreams is a jealous, fearful person who does not care about you. Follow your dreams of life and focus on yourself as a woman. One needs to love oneself to fully love someone another human being as to live with another human being.
I was raped at 16 years old by five guys on the football team. I had to sweep it under the rug and try to wash away the scariest party night I had ever experienced. The guys were calling me an Indian squaw, stupid ‘whore’, and yelling, “You are no good.” I was devastated.
I kept dating men but had not learned the lesson that I did not need a man.
I studied art, journalism, Business union management, computers, and other subjects of interest. Boys were always barking up my tree. I should have been pickier or just lived by myself.
I married in the 80s. I had no plans for marriage at 30 nor to have children at that time. He swindled me into marrying him and having babies. The lesson I learned from that disastrous marriage is we had nothing in common and I should have ignored the ‘dude’.
We divorced, but I remarried an artist this time. That ended in April 2000 in domestic violence,
After we divorced, I had all these musicians barking up my alley. I followed one to Austin, Texas. I left an excellent job in computers with good retirement. He moved back to LA, and I stayed because my auntie was in her 90s and I wanted to be with her. A lesson from this is my family in Austin were strangers to me. I had not seen them in 40 years. Never move across country on a whim to follow a ‘dude’ to his destiny when it’s probably not your destiny. Check your family out that are strangers and only remember you as a little curly headed throwing tantrums child. Just because they are family does not mean they are your best friend.
I got involved with a ‘dude’ who moved in with me after the third date. I do not advise anyone to do that. I collaborated with the man.
My letter will end here as the chapters of my life are extensive with heartache, pain, joy, laughs, and life ‘happens’ experiences.
My final note to the world is, “As a woman please do not let men interfere with your beauty or your well-being. If they show one bit of jealousy or start dictating your life to you, walk away before the years pass and you say at 74, “OMG! I wish I would ‘of’ or could ‘of’ known about life before all those broken relationships of wrongdoing men ever came into fruition. Watch for red flags to not get involved with a narcissist person period.”

A Message Through Time
Marli Wright

If I could send a message across sea to shining sea,
How would I convey my advice in just one piece?
What have I learned in this short life so dear,
That is important for everyone to hear?
I suppose it would be to cherish each moment,
The good, the bad, and those moments hard to bear.
Laugh and be present, and cry in your grief,
Follow your dreams and never look back in disbelief.
Love with a heart that fears nothing at all,
Give freely of yourself and let others give in return.
Hug your loved ones tighter each day,
And thank God for another moment they stay.
Cherish the heartbeat of an unborn child,
Learn from the old soul, who offers a final smile.
Take it from someone who has loved and lost,
This unbearable grief of a child’s loss.
Live each moment as if they can see,
And make yourself proud of the person you’d want them to be.
Remember, in an instant, life can be gone,
So cherish it deeply before it’s withdrawn.

Trying something new is always scary; fears held me back for many years. The what-ifs dominated my mindset: What if I was not liked, or, worst of all, what if I failed? I was not the typical person you would expect to start a business.

Researching starting a business is the easy part. I took classes, developed spreadsheets, and made plans; organization is one of my strengths. But the next step, actually creating the business and working with clients, was terrifying. I constantly asked myself if I could be a wedding planner and run my own company.

Initially, I kept my full-time job. I was full of doubt about my ability to make any money in this new venture. Quietly, I took clients and worked after hours and on the weekends. This lack of confidence meant I charged too little, and I did not have confidence in my abilities. That first two years before every wedding, I would throw up and be unable to eat anything. I began to dread the panic that I knew would rise as the clock got closer to the ceremony and reception time.

Then I had my first successful wedding, another, and yet another. I received handwritten notes saying how happy the couples were and that they couldn’t imagine their wedding without me. I started getting less anxious on wedding weekends.

My day job became tedious, and I felt disconnected and bored. However, I came alive after work. I scheduled client meetings, catering tastings, and networking events, and soon, I began to refer to my profession as a wedding planner and business owner.

My annual review is where I told my boss I was leaving. I always worked well with him and told the truth. My calling was no longer in a cubicle in a corporate job. It was being independent, running my own business, and planning weddings. He looked at me and said, “I cannot even counter with a better salary or promotion, as you will have neither. But I am happy for you, sad for us.” With that, I left the comfort zone of an air-conditioned office, 401K matches, and a guaranteed paycheck every two weeks.

Had I not taken that leap of faith right then and there, I may not have ever taken it. The atmosphere was right for the risk; I was young, the economy was booming, and I had a supportive partner. It was as if the universe conspired to provide the right time and place for this new venture.

You always hear about the financial investment in entrepreneurship. What needs to be talked about more is the emotional investment. You get attached to logos, taglines, mission statements, and website copy. Couples that entrust you on one of their most important days become friends. Fellow industry professionals become confidants, casual Instagram followers, or arch-nemesis. You find yourself advising newer planners, telling them what you would have done differently, and teaching them how to be successful. You realize they look up to you, you of all people, the person you thought would fail.

I began this journey 18 years ago. Two years ago, I sold my business to one of my employees. It was hard letting go, but I knew it was time.

When an international pandemic occurred, many canceled or postponed weddings. Deftly negotiating this financial and emotional minefield for clients was one of my most significant accomplishments. There wasn’t a playbook for making this work. I didn’t have the luxury of perfectionism, but I had the confidence I sought once I let go of expectations. I could say I was a damn good wedding planner.

This pandemic earthquake fundamentally changed the industry, but more importantly, myself.

I began to reevaluate my priorities and my feelings about the business. I realized that, much like when I quit my corporate job, I was ready for something new. I didn’t dislike wedding planning worse; I didn’t have any feelings about it either way. That was my cue to leave.

I left with the professional designation of Master Wedding Planner. My company, Red Letter Event Planning, was listed as a preferred vendor at most of the area’s venues and had hundreds of five-star reviews and referrals from past clients. More importantly, though, I left satisfied that I had built something successful and resilient. I no longer was the anxious perfectionist who wondered if I was good enough.

Taking the risk of starting and building was nerve-wracking, but it was one of the best things I have ever done.

Be yourself entirely and unapologetically
Be love purely and magnetically
Be wisdom openly and prophetically
You will detour as you explore to become more
You will rise as you begin to amplify your core
You will experience moments to recover and restore
Redefine what you value and believe to be true
Stand in love and harmony to be the most authentic you
Don’t allow shame to hold you captive
Negatively evaluating yourself is maladaptive
Your purpose is deeply rooted within
Release the fears that make you pretend that you don’t have what it takes to win
The world awaits your creativity so PLEASE begin

I feel like we forget sometimes that it’s not about sharing our story but the wisdom that comes from the experiences.

You don’t have to have everything figured out to be great. It is who you are naturally.
You just have to be you.
And continue to be you.
That is your power.
Because no one else can do that
It’s all you.

And knowing that
is the greatest thing you could ever know.

I feel like we get caught up in trying new things
or trying to figure out life
that we forget to check in.
To check in with the one who got us this far in the first place.
It’s important to check in
it keeps you balanced
and connected
to the source.
The source within

*I often look back at my younger self and think, oh, if she could see me today!

If I had the chance to tell her what I know now, what would I say?

Things are much different now than they were back in the day.

*You see when I was young I didn’t have your typical dream

My life wasn’t always what it seemed

Some days all I wanted to do was scream.

*There were times in my life I didn’t think I was going to make it.

There were days where all I wanted to do was quit.

You see I had trauma that needed healing, but I never wanted to admit.

*I thought that I could do it all on my own.

I never wanted any of my pain to be shown.

So I thought, I had to go through it all alone.

*Truth was there was always someone by my side.

He stood there with his arms open wide.

All I had to do was lay down my pride.

*You see pride is a deceiver, it makes you think you can do it all.

Truth is it just puts up a wall.

Eventually you learn, that the burden is too much to carry, and you fall.

*That’s what happened to me.

I fell down right on my knees.

Praying to God to forgive me, please!

*I had felt so worthless that I never thought I could be loved.

God said to me, my daughter you are beloved.

Your sins are forgiven because of his blood.

*Jesus gave his life so that I could be saved.

So that I no longer had to live a life of being enslaved.

His sacrifice and forgiveness makes me feel amazed.

*So here I am today.

I stand here to say, all will be okay!

With Jesus, you will find your way!

*Your dream to be loved and to be free is available for you.

I’m here to tell you that you will make it through.

With God he makes all things new.

*Dreams really can come true!

It can happen for you too!

So never give up on your pursuit!

Life is beautiful and ugly
Life is loud and quiet
Life is light and dark
Life is sad and funny
Life is long and short
Life is exciting and boring
Life is lonely and congregated
Life is here and then it’s gone

In the blink of an eye life will turn and show you the dichotomy that surrounds us every moment

Never be complacent in this world and appreciate the NOW because that is all we really have

There is always an outcome… unpredictable. The constant is knowing it will either be positive or negative – this is the power of the universal energy

Be present always and understand the value of recognizing these possibilities

Never fear change as it will happen regardless

Focus on the space you inhabit right where you stand

Realizing your place is ever changing and malleable

The freedom of this
acceptance and no expectations is priceless

So love this life and those you meet along the way

They too are learning the lessons

If we pay attention we are each the teacher and the student

We each have so much to offer and so much to gain

So much to lose in failing to see this in everyone walking their own path

Always be kind ❤️