Dear Teen Me,
Hey! Look at you, so young, timid, unsure… don’t worry, it doesn’t last forever. You will age, and through your next few years you will fall and get up. And again, you will fall and get up; some of the times you get back up it will be thanks to your friends… tell them you love them more. You don’t understand it now, but you truly love your friends.

As you age your timidity will alleviate. But boy will that take some time. You’re going to have to strip away at your understanding of… everything. You’re going to experience just about everything you’ve dreamt about, worried about, and wondered about; it’s not how you think it will be. Your heart is going to get so broken, more than it already has been. More than you can imagine right now. I’d say prepare for it, but there is no preparing for some of the pain you’re going to experience. But you know what… you always get back up.

You may be a little unsure, but you’re resilient. And that resilience is what will make you thrive. Those people calling you a dreamer only helped strengthen your ground. You’re getting out of that small town, you hear me? It’ll take longer than expected but you do it. And that’s when you blossom!

The idea of leaving the country for a big city? Done. The wish to learn how to help people by studying them? On it. The need to inject yourself into social justice? Doing it, finally! Your hope to be recognized for your art? Working on it. Something to call your own. Check! The hope that you can push past your insecurities… ehhhhh. You’re getting there; there’s a lot of layers to that. But the things you’ve been doing, the people you’ve been meeting, the words you’ve shared… it all adds to that process. You’re pushing yourself and it really is paying off. What did Dr.Schmitt say? Sometimes you got to fake it till you make it.

Things look small right now, you only have so much perspective. But you and I both know, you’re not small. You don’t do small… you can appreciate small, but you weren’t made for it. There are people in your ear, important people to you, telling you it’s too much. Making a joke of your ambitions and that is pushing you down; just as it’s meant to. You hear them say you’re not good enough, then those words turn into self-doubt. Don’t let people do that to you. That’s SO unfair, you yearn to learn. But once you’re told you’re not good enough to learn that, or fast enough, or smart enough: that’s when that doubt externalizes and it’s only doing you (and the world) a disservice. You’ve got a lot of potential, your heart is in the right place, don’t let your timidity and their negativity affect your progress. You’ll figure this out when it’s almost too late, but lucky for you, it’s never too late!

Right now, you’re worried; worried that at 30 you will not have lived a life. Let me tell you right now, you’ve lived more than a life. You’ve lived an adventure… one for the books! And we’re only halfway through. We’ve only covered the personal stuff: first loves ending, guardians dying, young love perishing in front of you… literally. So much of what you will experience will hurt, but it’s a good thing you’re resilient.

Remember: that resilience will help you thrive. It will push you to take all those leaps that you held back on. It will force you to look at your boundaries and make some important edits. And by doing this you will live out those daydreams. The protests we’ve participated in, things we’ll learn, connections we create. It’s all adding up to the very life people told you was impossible to lead.

Listen, at 30 you’re not exactly where you think you’re going to be. But guess what, most people aren’t! And what’s even better, you’re taking the right steps. You’re BASICALLY where you thought we’d be. Hell, there was a point we didn’t even think we’d be alive right now. So no, you’re not exactly living the dream… but you are learning how to live it. We’re on the way and it’s intimidating. Just hang in there, you’re halfway through then you’ll see what I mean.

I hope this letter reaches the right me in the right place at the right time… in case there is another that needs to hear this. You’re doing great.

With love and hope,
You