Trinitee Stokes: To All The Dreamers, Here Is How I Found My Way

Trinitee Stokes is an actress, singer-songwriter, fashion designer, author,  public speaker, blogger , and producer. In a letter to young women, she encourages women to pursue their dreams, and provides them with some guidance along the way.

We will host a show with Trinitee on Monday, May 12th at 8:00 PM Eastern Time. We are looking for members of The Unsealed to help us interview Trinitee. Please register here if you are interested.

Thank you Unapologetic Communications for making this interview happen.

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To All the Dreamers and Visionaries,  

I was only three years old the first time I experienced the rush of performing. But before I made it to the stage or television, the flicker that lit the flame inside of me was watching Raven-Symoné on That’s So Raven. There was something about the way she could make me — and everyone else — laugh that just clicked with my soul. It lit something in me and pushed me straight into my purpose.

When I first started performing, I don’t remember practicing or exactly what I said, but I remember the feeling when I first stepped on stage. I remember saying whatever that line was, everyone laughed, and it felt like fireworks going off within me. I knew then that this was what God was calling me to do.

At eight years old, I was cast as Judy Cooper in K.C. Undercover on the Disney Channel. On the first day, I learned all my lines and embarked on “the first day of forever,” even though I didn’t know what to expect. I just loved the whole process: wardrobe fittings, hair and makeup trials, and stunt practice. I remembered that same feeling I had when I was three — overflowing with the joy and anticipation of being a performer. 

Even though I love acting, I decided to pursue more of my interests — actually, all of my interests. Now at 19, I am also a country singer/songwriter (check out my new song, “Write You Off”), public speaker, author, host, Substack blogger, fashion designer, and an 18-year-old college graduate. 

A lot of people think I should stay in one lane because it’s difficult for them to imagine someone refusing to be put in a box and excelling at many things. But I wholeheartedly disagree. If something makes you happy and brightens your life, why wouldn’t you entertain the option to pursue it? We all should have the freedom to operate in multiple lanes. It’s how we learn and grow. 

We all should have the freedom to operate in multiple lanes. It’s how we learn and grow. 

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My life has been blessed — but let’s be real, it hasn’t all been glitter and good times. Every career field that I have delved into has come with a hefty dose of rejection. Not everything that interested me was best for me. That’s up to God to make the final call and for me to rely on His ultimate wisdom. I quickly found that I had to learn to trust God, the process, and remember my why, which is that every creative medium I express through art is one that brings me great fulfillment and, most importantly, is a part of my purpose. 

I started college at 15, and it was DEFINITELY a bit of a transition, jumping into the classroom with students who were much older than me and had been learning in a traditional setting for their entire lives. Furthering my education during the pandemic also added its own challenges. Nevertheless, I persevered through wifi glitches, time zone differences, difficult personalities, and challenging teachers. Through it all, I made sure to keep my end goal in mind when challenges arose, whether they stemmed from my age, race, gender, or any other bias. 

I have also experienced cyberbullying. I have been in the limelight for most of my life. And with that, comes a lot of people’s opinions about how I choose to live my life. Some folks might think “being famous” is all glamour based on the curated posts they see on social media. That couldn’t be further from the truth. But, I would be truly remiss to start questioning who I am based on negative comments from people who hide behind fake names and false profile pics. 

There was also an audition for a project where I made it to the final two. I had totally convinced myself that this would be the perfect role for me and that I would knock it out of the park. But I didn’t get it. Usually, something like that wouldn’t really knock me off my kilter, but this time was different. Instead of enjoying my usual bounce-back ability, I sat there for two or three days sulking. Eventually, I came to myself. I quickly remembered that my value and self-worth are not dependent on whether or not someone else sees it.

I made sure to keep my end goal in mind when challenges arose, whether they stemmed from my age, race, gender, or any other bias. 

Today, I am working on producing my own show, developing movies, game shows, and everything else that is on my heart to do. I want to be in a position where I can create space for myself and others and not rely on fitting into other people’s visions all the time. After some time, God showed me exactly why I didn’t book that role, and I was so glad about it. Had it not been for the time on the other side of that rejection, I would have never discovered other passions of mine. 

Being rejected and facing challenges has motivated me to generate my own opportunities, to take more agency over my career, and to let go of the thought process that I have to wait for others to make my dreams come true. When in reality, all I need to turn a dream into reality is God and a whole lot of tenacity. 

I have also realized it’s okay for people not to like me or my work. Why? Because I love me. I know my worth and live my life unapologetically. As long as I am happy with myself and my work, that’s all that matters. 

At the end of the day, I define who I am. And you can, too. 

It always serves us well to remember, when we come into situations that require lots of perseverance, that we have a right to be in any space just as much as the next person. Also, hard work and having faith have been central to my success. If the goal is to graduate from college or sell a show, I can’t just throw a penny into a well. I have to prepare. I have noticed that when I am prepared for every dream or goal I have, when the opportunity presents itself, I am able to maximize it to the utmost. 

I have learned to pray as though everything depended on God, but to work as though everything depends on you. And if you do the work and live in your purpose, the rewards will come. But what’s more important than anything is to enjoy the ride and take in the view on the road to accomplishing your goals. 

I have learned to pray as though everything depended on God, but to work as though everything depends on you.

Everything I do is an offshoot of who I am. Reading is something I love to do, so I became an author. I’m a music listener, so I create music. I enjoy watching TV and watching movies, so I take part in making them. Fashion is something that I loved as a child, so I design. I live my life authentically — no matter what people say or think, and you can, too. Even my new song, “Write You Off,” and my Substack page are outlets for expressing myself. We all deserve the chance to live a good, fun, and fulfilling life that can bring and spread joy. 

Every day, I choose to reach for the stars and hope to bring back the sun. That’s what I want you to take away from my life story. Be the sun in your own solar system. If you have a talent, interest, or skill in something, you owe it to yourself to explore that!

Ask yourself what you truly want, and start moving toward it. As I continue on my journey, I now hope that I have not only given you permission to seek joy, but also inspired you to live fully. 

With lots of love, encouragement, and laughter,