• vickitrusselliart submitted a contest entry to Group logo of Write a poem (or letter) about a turning point in your lifeWrite a poem (or letter) about a turning point in your life 9 months, 4 weeks ago

    "MY FAITH KEEPS ME SANE"

    Dear Unsealed,
    My faith keeps me sane.
    There are many twists & turns in my life.
    I will be 75 on September 18, 2024.
    As one that goes before
    Gen Z and other decades I have many stories to tell
    As deep as an old wishing well.
    I worked at The LA Times,
    All day every day.
    I met my kid’s dad,
    Which turned out to be very sad.
    He did not work there.
    His twin did.
    I met Jekyll & Hyde, I did
    But blew it off,
    Threw salt over my shoulder for a start.
    Neither were in journalism or writing or art.
    They were both security guards.
    Oh lordy!
    As an empath I dated a narcissistic guard
    Who pretended to care,
    Wined & dined me.
    So, it would be
    I was so naïve.
    Well, that would be I had two C-Sections.
    Both were ten pound babies,
    One was born 1983,
    The other was born 1987,
    The year before my mom went to heaven.
    This was a marriage of two boomers in the 80s.
    The father was from south LA.
    The mom is from North Hollywood,
    Of her own hood.
    I am of worldly DNA.
    He is a Black Republican narcissist.
    He is a gun loving nut.
    He is a woman hater.
    So, when I found out he lied to me profusely everyday
    Along the way of the everyday
    Way, we trod to different roads and ways,
    Of how I was so naïve.
    I was into college and looking forward of being a reporter soon.
    But he manipulated me as a man into marrying him.
    He wined & dined my parents under the moon
    In REDONDO BEACH pier,
    Only to smear
    My mom’s name after she died of a massive heart attack 1988.
    When he told me he hated my mom & glad she was dead
    I cried for days.
    My heart was broken that day
    I found out he was cheating on me,
    It had to be,
    More lies!
    I traveled to Palm Springs with my boyfriend. I left the boys at their dad’s mom’s house. Upon arriving back to my Burbank apartment, I found out my ex, the kids dad and his twin had locked me out because I vacationed in Palm Springs. I cried for hours.
    My plan was to pick the boys up from their grandma’s house. When I called my ex, I was banned from seeing them. He told me I was a bad mom. He spent over 30 grand on a divorce attorney. I spent 600 bucks on my Montgomery Ward attorney. It was a horrific divorce. I loved my boys very much, but the courts took my kids and placed them with their narcissistic dad.
    The turning point was when I chose to go on a vacation with my movie boyfriend to celebrate my birthday in the year of 1989.
    My ex is still trying to turn my boys and now my grands against me because I am a liberal boho hippie chick who still is an empath, a liberal, equality for all, for gun control and education for all.
    I accept the fact that he is holding my personality and belief systems against me. He once told me during the divorce that he had to blame me for everything because he was perfect and wanted to keep his job.
    I began with a poem and a prose as I have my entire life but the seriousness of the 1980s events changed my life more than anyone will ever know.
    I continued to work in the music and film industry moving forward. I was a union rep for the IATSE at Universal Studios Hollywood, worked freelance for three newspapers, and continued my educational pursuits until I was 51 years old.
    However, when I told my grown boys the truth, they were angry with me, calling me a liar. It did not end well. Now my ex, my two boys want to shut me down politically and as a human being. This is probably because I tell the truth, and you do not push a narcissist into the wall because they sting like a honeybee and dig into the person spreading their venom across states and other humans. I have been in therapy for many years. I am much better now. The turning point from being a good mother to becoming a bad human as my ex called me in 1989 was shocking and like a horror film.
    I watched a movie from the 80s called, “The Good Mother”, a 1988 movie about a divorced mom with a daughter who meets an artist, and her ex gets custody of the child. The movie is available on Prime Video.
    I pray every day for peace, love, & understanding. I will continue my humanitarian activist ways!

    Vicki Lawana Trusselli

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    • Vicki, I am so sorry that you were lied to and treated so horribly by someone who should have loved and respected you. The fact that you were also denied access to your children just makes it more heartbreaking. I am glad that, throughout it all, you have been able to stick to your beliefs and not be swayed by the lies of another person. I hope you can make peace with your boys! Thank you for sharing your experience!

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      • Emma, I moved away from California from 2003 to 2016 . I flew out to visit my boys. My youngest son born 1987 lives with his dad in Los Angeles . My oldest son lives in Long Beach . I see them but have had to create boundaries between me and his dad and uncle . I love my daughter in law . Anyway I move forward . I have a therapist . We were not compatible at all. Unfortunately , I seem to attract narcissistic men as an empath . Now with therapy I see the error of my ways. I see my boys . They are all grown with kids who are almost grown 😂. I have one new two year old granddaughter . She plans to visit real soon. I have cried a lot but kept working and attending college after my divorce and had to 0ay bills . I didn’t know how to navigate the divorce in the late 80s. I paid $600 for my attorney . My ex the dad paid 30 grand to a top notch attorney in LA. Have you watched the 80s movie, “The Good Mother?” it’s the 80s movie not the recent one . I love my kids but unfortunately I am a humanitarian progressive liberal woman since I was born . They all joined MAGA for a bit. This is what we wrote about.The good the ugly the bad and the The light . Striving to continue the truth and to be in the light . Thank you for responding . I used to never tell anyone because I thought it was my fault then my therapist told me not takes two to tango.

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