Dear Fear,
You know who it is
It’s me, the one you toil with
The one you constantly attack
Cuz you know that I won’t fight back
Well, I have words for you today
Something I’ve been wanting to say…
Is this that I’ve changed,
Understand this, you haven’t been the grandest roommate
I see you’ve been littering in my house
You’ve killed the atmosphere
The aroma is stale, no new fresh breath of air
Dead is all I can say
But now I have decided to change up the game
I’m getting up and taking a stance
Decided to water the flowers today
A change in pace
Eviction notice on your door
Time for you to get out the way
No more I say
You won’t rob me of the greatness that radiates inside me
I have a grander plan got from the Most High
The master plan
This greatness you can’t stop; according to His will it’ll add to the unity
The fight against forces that humanity can’t see
I know you now
I see your intention
You are a part of the darker forces scheming to rob steal and kill me, my fellow brethren and sistren
Ye don’t you know Light is Truth
No more silly games
I decree and declare you are no more welcome here
You will not when the fight against the Children of Light
Forever, Truth Has the Victory
Now I stand with a sound mind, of peace and love
Knowing now with Christ I can do all things
For when He is for me, who can be against me, not even you
I won’t be seeing you anytime, not even soon✌️
Brothers & Sister, wear this around your neck like a scarf,
“For God did not give me a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind!” 2 Timothy 1:7

Style Score:67

Dear Fear,

Hey it’s me again. I thought I got over you, but somehow, I’m still afraid to win. Like we been together so long, I tried to be so strong. I thought we were done. I was so confident, I shined like the sun. Fear you, done a number on my dreams, I allowed you to mute my screams. Suppressions caused my brain too much stress. Somehow still trying my best. I overcame the shame, the pain, the abuse, and the misfortunes. One thing that remains is the distortions of altering time. Trying to accomplish goals, meanwhile, filling the holes of emptiness, somehow, the fear of failure is something I can’t digest. I try my best, I fail, I’m like Jill, looking for jack with the water pail, he walked right past me on the trail. Every time he doesn’t see me, it’s another depiction of invalidation, I’m so thirsty and have me waiting. The fears of lack of love have me hating, raging, in anger, now every time I speak, I’m in danger. My thoughts out loud. Schizophrenic head in the clouds. Fears of the unknown, and the unheard, I’m never quite, I get on my own nerves. So alone, but strong. I keep going, never will I quit, I’ll admit I was so scared to fail, probably because I never had anyone to wish me well. So much pain my brother died in a cell. Now I’m locked and my mind is the jail. But God was the lawyer, the trial was this mental disorder, and I will make it out. I will soon win, I won’t always be in a drought.

Fears of failure? Outside in a world looking for your treasure, but the whole time you’re the treasure. Your gold, it’s so much beauty in the pain you hold. Be bold, and don’t live in fear, although they live in facades, they have problems there.

Dear fear, you will never win. I have this resilience built in. I’m in the season of succession, destined to teach people all my lessons. Dear fear, fuck you! I have better things to do.

Sincerely,

Lu

Dear Fear,

I immediately regret using a cordial word like ‘dear’ in my greeting. I have zero friendly feelings toward you. You freeze us in our tracks. Fear, you are a giant speed bump on the roads we take to self-actualization. You keep us from getting close enough to the people who need us, as well as those who can help us overcome you.

Choosing one fear to write about in an uncertain world full of trepidation is difficult. I reject some of the bigger and darker fears that people have. Death doesn’t scare me. I can’t summon up fear for a one-time event that is inevitable for us all. It will happen. It’s all of humanity’s destiny. And once it happens, it’s possible we’re not even going to know or care. It’ll be over, and our book of life, at least in this realm, will be closed.

Fear of failure is a popular choice of many, but I’ve never feared failure. Perhaps I’ve fallen short so many times that I’ve become inured to failing. I’ve always believed that if you’re not failing, you’re not trying enough. So, come at me, failure, and I will give you a great big hug.

Way back in 1974, Jim Stafford had a Billboard-charting song titled “Spiders and Snakes” in which Stafford sings of his dislike of the title creatures. They perfectly describe you, my fear. I don’t literally mean creepy, crawly spiders and slithering snakes, although I will admit that coming across a hairy spider in the basement or a snake ready to nip at my ankles in the garden are not my favorite experiences. Maybe if I lived in Australia, where most living creatures are ready, willing, and able to kill humans without any provocation, actual spiders and snakes may scare me. But I live in the USA’s Midwest. Most spiders and snakes I encounter are benign and harmless, except for the figurative ones.

I’m referring to “spiders” like:
“It’s going to take too long.”
“I’m not creative enough to come up with ideas.”
“I don’t have the skills to do that.”

And to “snakes” like:
“I just don’t have the time.”
“I’ve never tried that before.”
“I don’t know how.”

I fear falling prey to those “spiders and snakes” far more than a hairy spider crawling toward me while I’m sitting in the bathroom or turning over a garden rock to find a snake. I much prefer a small bite that will surely heal (again, I’m in the US Midwest and not Australia where almost every living creature is poisonous) to the crippling power of the metaphorical “spiders and snakes” that can stop our lives dead in our tracks with fear. I always try to be kind to animals, but I have no qualms about squishing my symbolic spiders in a tissue of determination or whacking my figurative snakes with a club of resolve. I hope PETA will cut me some slack and look the other way as I dispatch the imaginary creatures representing my actual fears.

And so, I have eschewed fears of death, failure, shark attacks, tornadoes, IRS audits, time share contracts, and buying life insurance, and I have settled on the ever-present metaphorical spiders and snakes in my life as my greatest fear. I can’t carry a tune to save my life, but you can always count on me to sing along unabashedly with Jim Stafford, proclaiming to the world that we both don’t like spiders and snakes.

With great disregard,

88% Style Score

It’s craaaaaaazy to think how my biggest fear has become to never live a life without you. For 39 years, we’ve been in lock and step with each other. Like on some, “Heeeeeyyyyy Twin” type-ish. And no shade to you because I played my part too, but respectfully, I’m done with you. I see how you’ve kept me from not wanting to be seen, experiencing unconditional love, accepting help from others, and even asking for help. I see how you’ve kept me playing small, afraid to shine the light that is so bright within me. There have been situations where I should’ve popped out and showed […] but instead I remained silent, not creating boundaries or advocating for myself. You’ve kept me from the truth, seeing it and speaking it and from living a fun and spontaneous life. Your chokehold has stifled my creativity and made change feel cumbersome and challenging.

It’s been giving, very Scary Spice, very Keeping up with the Joneses, but also very do you not know who TF you are?!!

The codependency of our relationship has made “letting go” some of the toughest and hardest pills to swallow. It’s kept me around people I had no business being around, questioning my own abilities and intellect and making me emotionally, mentally, physically, spiritually, and financially insecure. Our relationship has made me untrusting of others, but more importantly of myself, leaving me in a constant state of survival.

Last summer, my therapist asked me do I love myself? And as hard as it was for me to admit, I had to say, “No.” Admitting that cut me the deepest, because our relationship and my fear of abandonment made me believe I’m not loveable and good enough just the way I am. It made me believe people-pleasing, and being agreeable, never bucking the system, and always compliant, made me deserving of love and acceptance. I believed I was keeping myself safe when, in reality, I was dying a slow death, trying to show up and give others what I so desperately needed to give myself—LOVE.

We’ve literally been through it all. And I love you, because you have been a part of me, and I’m learning the importance of loving all of me, but today I release you with love. We go no further because just having this attachment is keeping me from being who I’m supposed to be—HER.

I’m writing you this letter, not to shame or guilt you but to liberate myself by choosing to release any residual anger for all the times I did not choose myself. To manifest the type of person and life I want to live, continue to heal and alchemize the pain I have endured and turn it into purpose.

You see, God has been reprogramming my mind and spirit to know and believe in something other than you—ME! She has been showing me the covering and protection over my life and how divinely guided I truly am. And through this unveiling, it has taught me how to trust in her divine plan and timing over my life. I believe when God has a specific calling over your life, it’s going to keep chasing you until you surrender to it. God’s been trying to show me why nothing else is going to work, no matter how hard I try. Our souls already have its divine purpose, its divine assignment and when you’re walking in your purpose, you don’t have to do anything but BE.

Now I’m going to be honest; I still don’t know the direction in which my life is headed. God has kept me cloaked from previewing that information, and I’m okay with that. Excited and anxious AF while waiting for it all to make sense, but still okay; and let me tell you why. I’m okay because I have worked diligently to make amends with you by digging deep and going into the depths of my shadows to identify the origin of your birth so I could heal every part of me affected by your presence. I’m okay because as I’ve gone through my isolation phase and endured every tower moment thrown my way, I see how God has been preparing me to step into a higher timeline by cultivating this unshakeable confidence, Omarion-like unbotheredness, and a magnetism only a Goddess in her divine femininity can create in me. He’s been developing my main character energy so I can be FREE to show up unapologetically as my authentic self. God said, “Genét, you are HER! And I chose you to be her because I’ve put a light and love inside of you to inspire and encourage others to see the same in themselves. But I need you to choose you too because you can’t choose you and fear? Not where I’m trying to take you. So, who is it going to be?”

And I chose me.

Style Score: 100%

Dear fear of mine,

Imagine peak summertime, peak childhood, skin fully lathered in Coppertone. 

It was a Friday, my last day of swim lessons. 

You introduced yourself to me with the persistence quite like a morning glory, winding from belly to throat until I became entangled with the unavoidably obvious fact that my time had come to walk the dreaded plank towards my destiny . 

The final test.

The diving board. 

Shuffling one foot in front of the other, I gripped the edge of the board with pruned toes and watched as the crystal blue oasis below transformed into the darkest pool of uncertainty . 

Paralyzed, I wondered why anyone in their right mind would put themselves in a situation such as this one. 

 I looked over at my dad, whose words echoed in the canals of my water logged ears. 

“You can do it” 

Your vine of flowering hesitation tightened with each beat of my terrified heart, but somewhere, beneath the ripples of doubt, a quiet knowing grew. 

So I made the leap, nose pinched, eyes closed, and plunged into the realization that the anecdote to loosen your hold is only to jump unabashedly into what I am called to do.

And as I continue to navigate life’s pools of possibilities, standing on the water’s edge of all that is before me, I see you not as the vine that holds me captive, but the current that unravels its grip, leading me from the tangled shores of uncertainty into the deep reservoir of my own courage. 

Style Score 77%

Dear Fear,

I am writing this letter to say goodbye. Before we part ways, there are some things I want to say. First, you’ve had control of my life for far too long. Fear, you and your associates plagued me so many times till I thought I was losing my mind. Fear of failure deterred me from going for so many of my dreams. I achieved many things, but I wanted to do much more. Fear of failure made me become my worst enemy, as I gave up instead of giving myself a chance. I accepted defeat prematurely before taking any actions or putting in minimum effort.

Projected upon me was also a fear of rejection that made me question my very worth. So many times, I chased after people and things that were no good for my peace. So many times, I felt as if I wasn’t good enough. The reflection in the mirror was hazy, as so many times, I hardly recognized who I was, constantly trying to conform to be accepted by others. Fear of rejection made me forgo values and standards that I had set for myself, settling for the bare minimum. I wish I could tell you about all the anxiety and insecurities that I experienced, but I am sure that you already know. For so long, I felt crippled by my overthinking because of fears.

Fear, while you’ve shaped much of my life, I won’t blame you entirely. I allowed you to take control of my thoughts and emotions, but not anymore. Your associates, such as fear of failure, are no longer welcome, for I have gained a brand new confidence. I am no longer worried about the things I haven’t accomplished, but grateful for those that I have accomplished. I am now pursuing those goals that I was once afraid to go for. If I succeed or not is not a concern, for sometimes, one must step out on faith. Fear of rejection no longer has power, for I have and am learning to love me, accepting and embracing the person I am, flaws and all. I know my worth and no one will ever make me question it again.

I can no longer allow you or your associates to take up anymore space. You cannot share space with my faith. So, fear, it is time to cut our ties to each other. I don’t know what the future holds, but I am not fearful. For the sake of my inner peace and happiness, I bid you goodbye as I fully embrace joy and gratitude.

Sincerely,

(100% Style Score)

God’s words fell down on me like rain.
Darling, your despair is not in vain.
I know that rape and abuse shattered your world.
But you’ll use that pain to heal women and girls.
Open your mouth, share your truth.
The world needs to hear what I planted inside you.
A closed mouth doesn’t get fed.
Tell them what God said.
I chose YOU to carry that weight.
Women who cross your path won’t endure the same.
I put two little girls in your womb;
they’re going to continue spreading seeds when they bloom.
Before you were born, these words were spoken.
Morgan. You were chosen.
It may feel like just pain on the surface.
However, pay pain attention, it will lead you to your purpose.
That pain is your compass.
How can you heal anyone, if you haven’t first healed yourself?
To heal is your mission and then share that wealth.
Don’t be anxious and have no fear.
You were created in my image and neither lives here!
You are my prophet.
As you go into the world to do what you’ve been told to do, my favor is extended to you.
Remember, if I favor you, the devil favors you too.
Now, If you’ve been obedient you’re on stage standing.
So help those in need gain understanding.
To anyone who has suffered abuse,
These words are from God to you.
Beloved, you are beautiful-from within.
The cracks in your heart are so I can shine my light in.
Inhale. Until air fills your insides.
Exhale. All the pain that filled your insides.
Extend yourself some grace. I will reprove King’s for your sake.
That assault was not your fault.
So remove your heart from the vault.
Hold your head high without a second thought.
Exalt.
Morgan, now back to you.
Standing on stage and speaking your truth.
I know you have fear, but you did it scared.
Real righteous and rare.
Continue to spread.
Tell them what God said.

Style score: 100%

Blessings swirled and danced and wove themselves through the lives of my capable friends, but seemed so unattainable, amends unavailable, to me and my sick intents.
Most days were spent in a thick, foggy haze, plagued with the side effects from alcoholic ways.
Ever drained from manufactured chaos.
Long nights with short payoffs.
And I was cocooned, bound and corrupt, drowning in my poisoned cups.
Doomed to combust.
Further fast-tracking my funeral once I discovered the stronger drugs.
But one day, BAM, a clarity!
A lightening bolt of serenity.
It just hit me – this mystery – a jolt to rewrite my history.
A new journey to heal after a decade of trouble and tragedy.
I could really feel.
This was a miracle I was too long scared to acquiesce; that is until I became more scared of impending, ultimate death.
I had found my hope and I wanted to really live, not just cope.
But I harbored so much jealousy and envy, it pooled and boiled within me, resentments lengthy. I was bitter at social media posts, vacations and dinner toasts, and those who were joyful and friendly I saw as an enemy – such a manic psyche in frenzy, anger too plenty.
So I took a personal inventory, being fearless and thorough as a moral explorer remembering to not rest on my laurels marching forward with decorum.
Apologies were spoken, forgiveness was given, and something that was broken within me now awoken, a new beginning.
I couldn’t believe all this emotion, the cosmos burst open for me to be free to see reality, breathing sober breaths.
Many people helped pull me up and out from Hell’s deep despair depths to where I could be content simply living in the present.
The cliche’s like, “poor me, poor me, pour me another,” I’d discover, were just one of the many clever motivators to help me recover.
In time I would find on this brighter side that if I did what was advised and followed my spirit guides and applied principles learned and tried to purge the pain, then blessings would emerge and inspiration would surge to unlearn a lifetime of my survival skills that no longer served.
What was once inconceivable, an existence so unbelievable, finally made achievable, and with a lot of effort and belief I processed my trauma and grief.
I entered into a new season of mind, something divine, one of intentional design after the old me died.
And happiness and sobriety were not just a naïve fantasy, but an actual goal I could and did achieve.
Today I can say I’m proud of who I became without shame or blame and reframe my past as a gift I purely needed to unpack.
I’m thankful for the positive impact that negative experiences can refract back.
I no longer lack or feel trapped or need to distract from life’s ebb and flow because I know no matter what I undergo, even a heavy blow that can knock me low, will only bestow lessons through which I get to grow.
This meaningful life, once a dream, is now a very real thing, and at the center of my world, with clenched fists unfurled, I embrace all the love that I’ve always deserved.

Dearest part of me, Little Bee
Always buzz buzz buzzing free
So happy and willing to be seen
Contrast to this self-effacing she
Where I breathe weak
Your bravery roots deep
Down to the depths of our trauma
Remaining after all these days
The Flora to my Fauna
You’ve had to be our Mama
In so many different ways
And carry us through difficulty
While loving unconditionally
Dancing boldly to wind’s song
Even when I have cold feet
You’re strong like an old tree
Gently swaying me along
Or sheltering when I retreat
You taught us to hope and dream
With the joy of playing dress-up
Our closet overgrown with good luck
Everyday still buds a new costume
You are my soul in full bloom
Forever young but older and wise
Growing together side by side
Branching us out with you our guide
Undoubtedly Love you’ll always be
The single greatest part of me