Dear Unsealed,
I think about the times in life that I struggled to get through life financially and physically. There are numerous events in my 74 years that have either changed my life for the better or set me back a bit before concluding that everything will be okay in a bit.
Life is a survival of utmost importance to live my life according to my ideals and attitudes about my life experiences, people I meet on a day-to-day basis of reality. I have survived many relationships with men, friends, and acquaintances.
I survived an 11-year relationship with a Texas cowboy. June 2016, he moved his younger girlfriend into his bungalow in Fulton, Texas. I had decorated the house in my boho style furnishings and was feeling comfortable. His brother called me to tell me his brother was two-timing me. The next day my ex told me he was moving his girlfriend into the bungalow, and I would have to move. So, I said, “Wow, seriously after 11 years?” He did not respond.
I walked into my office, sat down to write a letter on my computer. I looked around at my cool new décor and almost cried. Then I heard him typing on his pc. I walked into the living room where he sat in front of his computer, chatting with his young girlfriend. They were exchanging love notes. So, I poured me a cup of coffee and walked back into my office. He had a doctor’s appointment that day. I waited for him to leave.
Upon his leaving I sat down at his pc, disabled his security system and other goodies to keep him safe that I had paid for forever. I got in my car and drove to the internet office. I explained what happened to the secretary at the office. So, they disabled the internet. I used my hot spot with my AT&T cell phone.
I drove home. He had returned home from his doctor’s appointment. He was desperately trying to start his pc. His pc was dead and so was the internet. He asked me, “Why did you do that? How will I chat with my girlfriend?” I told him, “Oh, maybe your new squeeze will fix it.” We did not talk much about anything after that moment.
I packed my bags with as many clothes and belongings as I could squeeze into my luggage. I packed the XBOX in my luggage. He was watching me. I did not care. I was done with his lies and carousing.
I had caught him in lies before but blew them off. We were never married. That was May 2016. I bought a ticket to LA. I sold my car. My friend picked me and my three suitcases up, my camera, my laptop to stay at her place before parting Rockport on a bus to Austin. I stayed with a friend in Austin who drove me to the train station. I rode the train over mountains, deserts, cities, towns to LA. Upon arriving in LA, I stepped off the train and bent down to kiss the ground.
I had been away from LA 13 years except for the vacation trips I took to visit my family and friends.
I was 66 years old. I sold my car, left half of my clothes, my family heirlooms, etc. in Fulton-Rockport, Texas. It was okay because I was home.
I survived other events too after arriving because life happens.
I stayed with my friends in LA awhile. I remember the day I left my friend’s apartment in North Hollywood to go to my son’s house in Irvine. Lyft dropped me off. I stepped out of the car to walk to my son’s front porch. I was towing three huge suitcases, a laptop, a camera, and my exhausted self into his house. I was 66 years old and humiliated that I was there in this manner of unfortunate circumstances. My son asked me, “Mom, hello. What did you do to Mike for him to kick you out?” I replied, “Nothing. He moved his girlfriend into the bungalow, so I had to leave, my name was not on the lease.” I ignored him. I asked him to help me with my luggage and show me to my room. So, he did that.
My relationship with his father ended in 1989. We were 180 degrees opposite. It was a horrible divorce. My dad was by my side during my divorce. There were so many tears.
So, after I arrived, I saw all my grandkids and concentrated on them, cherishing every minute I spent with each of them.
My story unfolds into so many avenues and freeways of life of being in different relationships with different men. I now know I can survive without a man. I do not need a man to create with, hang with ever again until I find one who is creative, truthful, caring and accepting of my ghost encounters and movie dreams of life.
The moral of the story is I do not want to go back to the 1950s when women were the property of their husbands. I refuse to go back. At 74 I survived two marriages and various relationships with people. Why go back now?
She goes
Where she strays
Across the roads
Of choices to take
In the wake
That she is older now
Too many men
Too many wrongdoing ones gone
So long.
She looks around her room as types away on her Lenovo laptop.
For what
To be alone to think about her life
As continues as an older woman
Of strife
Of joy, pain, happy times
As the clouds go away
The sun shines so close and so far, away
Surrounding her body
The bells chime
The music blares out of Alexa
LIFE IS GOOD!
A gypsy soul lives!