Dear reader,
My name is Colleen and I have ADHD. I’m sending this letter in hopes that maybe my words can explain how I have been misunderstood my whole life because of my disability. Having ADHD is confusing enough as it is but there is also navigating the neurotypical world attached to it. Inside my head, my brain is always working overtime. So many ideas, tasks, attempting to stay focused in the moment, memories, worries about the future, and for some unexplained reason, background music 24/7.
Now that you know a little bit about what’s going on in the mind of a 35-year-old ADHD woman, it might be easier to understand why so many conversations I have are met with confusion and misunderstandings. When I am talking to you, I’m trying to navigate between what you are saying and all the thoughts going on in my brain. For example, I may trail off midsentence and jump from one topic to the next. It’s not because you are boring me or I don’t care about what you’re saying, my brain just can’t stay in one place for too long. I will take all your experiences and then tell you about a similar one that I have had. I am not doing this because I think my stories are more interesting than yours or that your experiences don’t matter, my brain just wants to connect our histories, by telling similar narratives, so that we can share and become closer. I might even interrupt you well you’re talking. I’m not trying to be rude, I want to say what I’m thinking right away, or I will probably forget what I was going to say. Even though it is difficult to express myself accurately at times, I promise I am trying my best to be understood.
My hope by writing this, you can try and imagine what it’s like to be someone with ADHD. Communication isn’t always easy and when there are discussions being held, I believe we are all trying to have what we’re saying be acknowledged with interest, love and care. I know that this is the experience of most neurodivergent individuals talking to others and often being misunderstood. As someone who struggles with situations like this frequently, I want to convey how important it is for others to take the time to ask questions, be curious, and have patience when talking to others. You never know what is going on in someone’s head and lives. Maybe when we strive to engage and listen to others then we won’t face misunderstandings any longer. Perhaps, by discovering how others communicate we can learn and grow together.

Sincerely,