By: Simone Coleman July 10, 2024

Dear little me (Simone),
How I praise you, with many thanks that you are my precious inner child. I thank you, how despite that my physical childhood days are over, I can still enjoy adolescent things in my adulthood as well. Honestly, who said that grown-ups hate to have fun? I’m all grown up, and I don’t hate to have fun and I never will all thanks to you, inmost heart & soul. I especially love and cherish you for being the source of my active imagination. Not to mention my immortality fandom for all my favorite cartoon shows growing up. Such as all things Disney, Danny Phantom, Dr. Seuss and even Sanrio; Hello Kitty & Friends.

I cannot believe how paranoid I used to be, as I was still processing through puberty and letting other’s disapproval get the better of me. Remember, when our folks used to lecture us, back when we were 13 yrs. old, about still watching cartoons being “immature”? They used to think that we were watching cartoons so much, that we were not focusing enough on reality, they were wrong anyway. It was even hard to have a good laugh, without our expounding Aunt yelling at us to “Stop clowning!” Let us face it, our endless love for cartoons, from the laughs, and exciting adventures the intriguing characters would have in their stories, have always helped us cope through our depression. The comedy and hilarious nonsense would bring us the best medicine to drink in, laughter.

While reality has often brought us down, and made us feel so lonely in the universe, cartoons have never done that. We both must agree how our active imagination was always our source to “Getting away from it all.” Not to mention how we could often relate to the many figments in our favorite tales, where we felt more welcomed in their fictional world than in our world of corporeality. Furthermore, thanks to our curious, abnormal wonders to the creators of the stories we have known and love, we have soon gained the potential skills to be creative ourselves through literacy and drawing. In conclusion, which is why with these talents we have inherited through our growth and passion for fiction, fun and adventure, grown up me (Simone), plans to spread joy to the children of this generation and the next, with our endless optimism ways, and creativity.

Overall, I wish to also inspire the children and even the young adults of today that fun, love of pop culture, or cherishing childhood memories never had to depart our lives, just because we’ve got responsibilities now. Let us not also forget how even in the bible God says “Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.” (Matthew 18:1-3). There is also that to consider, with remaining a child at heart. Let us both remember that growing up (old) physically is mandatory, but remaining young inside is optional.

Accompanied with deep gratitude.
Yours truly, Simone (fully-fledge you).

It has always been 
Just you and I
Where trees and rivers meet

We swam, we sang
We played with dolls
We danced with two left feet

For all the years
-from then ‘til now-
It hardly seems that distant

And though things change
-or stay the same-
We grew up in an instant

I’ve heard your laugh
I’ve felt your tears
I’ve lulled your heart to sleep

If you should know 
Of all your pieces
I’ve always hoped to keep
Gather on this couch
With me
Because my list is steep:

Your laughter,
How it fills the room
Your smile, 
For shining bright
The way your heart can break in two
Yet you appear all right. 

The way you always push ahead, 
Fearing nothing under the sun
How even if you lost it all, 
You walk away as if you’ve won.
 
While twenty-eight is merely a stranger
To five, and six, and nine

The memories I’m grateful for
Have always been yours and mine

After all has come and gone
The years, the woes, the distance

Thank you for never choosing to
Take the path of least resistance. 

Love, 
Yourself

Dear inner child✨
You are my little ray of sunshine, to give me hope on the gloomiest of days.
You make me laugh when I want to cry.
You take the seriousness away and remind me that I’m okay. You sing me the songs that allow me to breathe in your life that still lives within me. I love you and all you do. You are kind and strong and your love is never wrong. You are honest and pure and your love will forever be an open door. Thank you:)

I said I loved you
But did I really?
I guess somewhat
But not ideally
Picked you apart
Judged you real hard
From this earth
I wanted to depart
Shrunk you so much
Daily I’d contort
But one day
I really saw you
And as time passed
I was more in awe of you
Your skin
Your smile
Your stare
I even came to love
The curls of your hair
The outside was one thing
And before
Only for it I cared
But as I got to know the inside
It topped the outside,
Beyond compare
Your intelligence
Your wit
Your endurance
Your grit
Your creativity
And charm
One of the things I love the most
You take accountability for your harm
Come to find out
Your heart is actually warm
And as it turns out
I’d want no other host
Congrats for all the growth you make
To it all, I give a toast.

DIVINE
In all of its essence, beauty and purity
The power you hold has never wavered
You’ve built mountains with your passion
You’ve created galaxies with your confidence
You’ve shattered complacency with your vigilante’s heart
Everywhere you go
Everyone you’ve touched
Everyone you speak to
Feel the depths of your soul
A true child of god
The energy you carry has brought us closer
To our higher power
To friends, family, lovers
To our Ancestors
To the Universe
That’s why I thank you
You’ve paved the way for my existence
That is why I protect you
You’re precious
To me
To this world
You are celestial
And there’s nothing I would change about you babygirl
You are home.
I’ll always be grateful
I’ll always be with you
I love you

– Pheonix

It’s hard to look at yourself and be okay with who you are. I understand that you are still trying to find yourself, but I want you to know that it’s okay to fail sometimes. I know you are depressed, I know you are anxious, and so often you feel so small and you don’t know what to do. I promise you if you just talk to mom and dad, they want to have a relationship with you. It doesn’t always feel that way. They may yell and try to over correct you and it feels like they don’t approve. You may be bullied now, but you won’t be bullied always, it will get better. It’s hard when they play on your insecurities, please don’t believe them. Please learn to love yourself, because you do have value. It may be hard to see, but you will see it…someday. You will get through it, and you will learn, and I am so proud of you that even when you tried to end things, you survived. Trey, I love who you are, please remember that. Don’t change your big heart, no matter how much hurt you feel, no matter how bad you want it to stop beating, choose to live.

Dear Little Logan,
Unfortunately, I don’t always remember being you, but I know how often you thought of me. You were always curious about how you would look when you got older, but all you could imagine was being taller. Well, you were right about that! Aside from that, though, I know you spent a good amount of time wondering who I would be. Well, we should be proud. You should be. I wouldn’t be who I am today if it weren’t for you. I love you for always looking out for us. You didn’t know it at the time– eight years ago– but you saved our life. Moving away from Mom was your very first step on your way to yourself. You didn’t even know it yet, but at age twelve, you were already taking control of your life and doing whatever you could to make us comfortable. That’s who you are, Logan– strong, wise, and caring. I’m proud of these traits; these are us. We didn’t learn this from Mom, Dad, friends, or anyone else. This is inside you, sewn into your soul– you care. I love this about you, but my favorite thing about you is that you are never too far from laughter. You went through hell, kid. But year after year, you laughed, you loved, you found joy wherever it could have been. You never seem to run out of love, and I adore that about you. I’ve never met anyone with quite so much love to give. That is an amazing thing. But remember Logan: save some for yourself. Love yourself like you love flowers and smiles and all your favorite songs. You and I both know the world needs love, but listen when I say that you do too.
You know what you went through, so be kind to yourself day by day. Credit yourself for your resilience. Never let go of your tenderness. I love you so achingly, Logan. I still carry your pain. I see you. I wish I could hold you now. So I do. I remember that you are at my center, that I have been constructed around you. There would be no me without you. I know how many people are telling you this, but hopefully, you’ll believe it if it comes from me: It will get better. It will get better when you move away from Mom. Then it’ll get better when you move away from Dad. It’ll get better when you move to Oregon. It’ll always get better because you steer us there. We know what is best for us.
Keep pushing through and keep finding love and sharing it. Never apologize for yourself. Remember I’ll always be with you. And remember that love will carry you through.

Hang in there,

Dear Abigail, 

Every day, I try to be more and more like you. 

I listen to your favorite song and sing in the shower like you used to. 
I pick out your favorite ice cream flavor and eat it on a random Tuesday simply because I can. 

I wear dresses you would love 
and twirl in the rain 
and I thank god for your existence. 

For everything that you are, 
That you’ve survived, 
That you’ll continue to survive. 

For every friendship you make, 
And for every friendship that ends. 

For the time you cut your hair shorter than any girl your age, 
And for the time you grew it past your waist. 

For your “tomboy” phase and all the basketball practices that Dad took you to. 
For your “girly girl” phase and all the flowers, Granny threw on stage at your ballet recital. 

For the boys you had a crush on, 
And the girls you loved in secret. 

For the times you looked in the mirror and cried softly into your pillow. 
But for the times you took a deep breath and put the swimsuit on anyways. 

For every trip, stumble, and fall, 
And your bravery that carried us through it all. 
The bravery that still carries us. 

For every time you’re told you’re “too much.” 
Or worse, 
“Not enough”. 

For every time you hear those words, and continue to twirl in the rain. 

I love you. I’ll keep trying to be as brave as you. Always. 

Love, 
Abby

You were weird
And quiet
And you might have been a beast

Your parents had prayed for an angel
When you arrived, spent and vacant
You opened your mouth
And no song rang out
Just a confused sort of yelp

You morphed into an eight-year-old human girl
Changed your clothes three times a day
Spun wheels of stories
Cried without sounds

Your mother said it was time to start showering
After coming indoor, greasy and breathless

Your father never looked at you the same
Once he caught your legs sprouting spikes of hair
He told his Wife to hand you the family razor

But you continued to smell like grass
Pretending the trees were friends
The dogs, your sisters

When you began middle school
You wrote love poems for your teachers
Tried out for basketball
They sent you to get tested for scoliosis
and the drool

But you howled the loudest in spring musical
Made fellow hairy friends
Who would later hunt you down

But snarled and unkempt
Starry-eyed and smelly

You kept
becoming

You are weird
And quiet
And you might be a beast.

Dear Beautiful Girl,

I am writing this letter to remind you of your beauty and kindness. Your trust in others and your love for animals are traits I deeply admire. Despite your husband’s dismay, your love for animals will always remain strong. Your connection with them is pure and unwavering, a testament to your compassionate heart. I understand your need to fit in, to feel wanted, and to be loved. When you look in the mirror, you might see flaws, but I see a beautiful girl who just wants to feel safe and accepted for who she truly is.

I want you to know that I am deeply sorry I couldn’t always protect you. Life hasn’t been easy for you, and I regret that I couldn’t shield you from the pain and hardships you’ve faced. However, I will always honor and cherish you. You have shown remarkable strength and resilience, and there is so much ahead for you—things you can only dream about right now. I know the pain you faced this year, and I am so proud of you for not giving up. You are a survivor through and through, and your perseverance is a testament to your inner strength.

I know your hopes and dreams, and I believe with all my heart that you will achieve them. One day, you will be an amazing mom. You will nurture and guide your children with the same love and care that you show to those around you. You will work hard and finally recognize just how smart and capable you are. Your intelligence and determination will take you far, and you will accomplish things you never thought possible.

One day, you will find love and learn what it means to have healthy, fulfilling relationships. You will recognize your worth and feel confident in yourself. The love you deserve is out there, and when it finds you, it will be beautiful and transformative. You will finally start writing, even though it took longer than you expected. Your words will flow, and your stories will inspire others. We will get there together, step by step.

Sweet Girl,

You are so brave, and you will need to keep being brave for a little while longer, but you will endure. The road ahead may be challenging, but you have the strength to overcome any obstacle. When you feel like you’re alone, remember that I am here. It’s you and me against the world. Your experiences, both good and bad, have shaped me into the person I am today. I will cherish and appreciate you for all that you are.

I will embrace your mistakes, your heartaches, your fears, and most importantly, your dreams. Your dreams are the light that guides you forward, and I believe in them as much as I believe in you. You are brave. You are kind. You are important. Never forget these truths, even when the world tries to tell you otherwise

Love,

You.

Hey Baby Girl. The world was not as kind as we once thought it was ; in fact its pretty cold and the places we once found warmth bare more shade than a willow tree. The world will test your morals, beliefs, strength and most of all your resilience . Please don’t lose sight of you. To give you hope in the times of despair I’ll share a little gem with you. Your smile brightens even the darkest room , your laughter is contagious. Your words hold more power than you know. Your faith will shake rooms and will also be your testimony. In your darkest times ; look inward your heart and intuition will guide you. Your beauty goes way beyond the physical. Your perseverance admirable. When you want to give up… keep going; you must! Your voice matters. Your story matters. I love you. Be strong .

Sincerely,
The older you

I close my eyes and remember all the things I loved about this chocolate little girl
The way she fearlessly belted every note, snapping her fingers in the mirror as she’d twirl
The rhythm would flow through her like a river reminding her to remain steady in the stream
This was a time when she believed in herself so much, she envisioned living her wildest dreams
 
I loved how she approached life with a carefree giggly attitude
How she’d sang every melody with courage, power, and gratitude
She’d stand in the mirror using the remote as her microphone
She felt unstoppable hopping on the bed to use as her stage, completely in her zone
 
I loved how she’d create beauty so unashamed of her art
How she carried infinite joy and resilience in her heart
I remember when she made a song about marmalade
And it was high key catchy even though her little brother threw shade
 
I loved to ride the waves of her imagination as she’d create without guilt or shame
She had this tenacious audacity that reminded others her fire could never be contained
She’d clothe herself in ambition and determination to speak
Especially when her mom crafted her outfits so classy, elegant, and chic
 
As I heal and return to embracing all those things I loved about the younger you
I release every limiting belief that convinced you your dreams wouldn’t come true
Your ancestors are guiding, protecting, and propelling you forward, right on queue
Whispering, “Rise up queen, this reflection of love is your breakthrough!”
 

You never cease to amaze me. That beautiful melodic way your heart beats, even when the people that were responsible for you couldn’t hear it. Your resiliency to forever want the peace to be kept, makes me strive to keep you protected. The way you always remind me to play each and everyday. The way you keep a bounce in my step, that turns to a skip shows me how good you feel to still be alive inside of me. The way your creativity flourishes when we color, the giggle you make when we can’t stay within the lines, it makes me feel safe. Safe enough to know that we accept us just the way we are. Forgive me for abandoning you, but thank you for your grace along this journey of putting you back to first. Your eyes are so bright and your trust in me, made me want to write. I promise to always tell you how important you are. How your dreams are so bold and the moon is the only limit for you. The ways I’ll hold space for you, are immeasurable, because your aura is too big to fit comfortably into a system that wasn’t created for your exquisite design. You never had to stay with me, but I’m so grateful that you did, because what would I be without my fearless butterfly. Constantly going through metamorphosis to grow back into what we were before the world got it’s hands on us. Your fiery determination to be the outspoken and unapologetic rebel. Stand firm in that for its opening doors to wonderland. Let your aura continue to light our path. You are enough. Unconditionally, I love you.

Love,
Me ♥️

Hello, princess .. it’s an unfamiliar word that we wished we heard more often. I am your future self, and i know you wouldn’t doubt it because we have always buried our heads in books to escape the disgusting reality we live(d) in. I couldn’t be more proud of the incredible person you have made us to be. Your resilience, creativity, and secret confidence have helped us overcome countless obstacles and thrive in the future. I want you to know that every sacrifice you made was worth it, and we are living proof of that. Keep being your amazing self and never lose sight of who you are even if you don’t know just yet. Those hugs, kisses, cuddles with a teddy bear, that love you crave. we get it all in your future. Just wish there was a way I could hold you tightly and assure you. The trip has been ugly for us but it will be prettier soon. I love you . Please give yourself a break, we were made to survive the savages . You are a goddess in the making . I’m sorry for not being able to fight alongside of you, but you do fight with me because without you none of this would be possible. I’m happy to be your future because you are still in it .
P.s. those scars will heal and they will be so cool in the future ! I love you forever my little white light princess . You will outshine everyone you cross paths with .
Oh and by the way Just know you are popular amongst people even if you don’t think so .. WE ARE THE COOL KIDS

As I reflect on my life in my thirties,
It feels like I’ve lived an eternity.
From innocent and sweet childhood days,
To learning how to love and weep in different ways.
My soul has shattered like glass on the floor.
Yet I’ve learned to pick it up once more.
Dreams are not always what they seem,
And fairytales remain in books we read in our dreams.
Life as a child was genuine and freeing,
Only fully appreciated when grown-up and foreseeing.
In these thirty-two years, I’ve seen life’s highs and fears,
Moments when I’ve wanted to die, and moments I’ve held dear.
I’ve experienced the joy of life and the pain of loss,
Sometimes in the span of a single day’s toss.
Reflecting on my innocence and childlike faith,
I realize it’s not always easy to maintain that state.
But my resilience to live outweighs my desire to die,
No matter how often I felt ready to try.
If I could travel back in time and meet the child version of me,
I’d say, “Life will be tough, you’ll face challenges you cannot foresee. But in the end, you’ll prevail, despite the hurdles you’ll meet.”

I hear you call my name
The sound so sweet and delicate. Traces of vanilla and honey lace around every word you say. Despite what they have said you’re a wonderful kid.
You’re just afraid.
I won’t repeat the cold words they say but I’m sure you already know them.
Im sure you know your nose shape, the way it crinkles when you laugh at something dumb. I’m sure you know how loud you are but your silence is far louder.
I know you see the way you eat, im happy to watch you indulge happily.
I know you know the way they talk about you like you’re not even there.
Well i see you.
I know they didn’t like to hug you. My arms are open wide, always. They don’t even compliment you but I couldn’t stop staring at the rare beauty you hold. Im gladly the beholder. I know you’ve been hurt in ways you really can’t understand, I’m sorry I can’t undo the pain. But I’ll make sure no one ever hurts you again.
You’re a pure soul who continued on, despite these thoughts you don’t understand.
Despite your small mind having been shattered, you’re still innocent, loving, and I want to love you forever.
You bring a joy that can’t ever be replaced.
You take my hand and it’ll be okay because I won’t ever let go.

Dear Chardy Pooh,

Chardy Pooh you did not Know!
You were so brave, You did not even know how much!
You stood up for self-value. Even when you did not know you were.
You stood up for being different!
You did not know that.
You stood up for peer pressure.
You did not know that.
You stood up for love.
You did not know it.
You stood up for hope.
You did not know it.
You were a strong person who stood for people, rights, love and acceptance!
You did not even know it. You did not know, you had anything to love about yourself. You did not know you had anything to be proud of. That’s why you almost did not write this letter. You did not know, but now you know! You had something to love! Something to be proud of!
I love and am so proud of you Chardy Pooh!!!

Thank you,
Charmaine

Dear Younger me,

I love how you beat the system

The sting from your dad’s hand, you will no longer endure
The swoosh of the cord from his swing you will no longer feel
The burning pain from his lighter you will no longer suffer
Watching him threaten mom and pull a gun on her, you’ll no longer witness

I love how you beat the system

Stumbling up the baby sitter’s stairs not knowing what will happen next
Climbing on his bed, water underneath knocking you off balance
Remember this was the biggest lollipop you felt and grossed one you tasted

I love how you beat the system

Not understanding why mom had to leave us or won’t be in pain
Not knowing she was living in a body that was no longer hers
Seeing your lifeless body laying in that wooden bed, part of me died
The touch of her skin is ice cold and body is pale like a ghost

I love how you beat the system

You could have picked up your first drink before legal age
You could have taken to the street and get paid to let others use your body
You could have fully died to be with your mom
You could have made so many poor choices but you didn’t
You beat the system, now live your life