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  • Beena Knope shared a letter in the Group logo of A letter to my younger self contest submissionsA letter to my younger self contest submissions group 2 weeks, 5 days ago

    To the mommy's girl in her twenties

    To the mommy’s girl in her twenties,

    I’ve been writing now for about two years because of everything I have experienced. I don’t think we ever felt the whole dear diary thing. I think writing these letters is a concept worth trying. After all those years of struggling with prompt writing around 2016 it no longer existed. Hopefully this letter will make it a little bit easier to navigate through your twenties and obtain that degree.

    Identify your toxic traits, we don’t have a lot queen trust me. You have to be consistent with being better versions of us in order to help others do the same. That toxic behavior will not pour out into your thirties. Let’s start off with my favorite Mom. If anybody knows mom like me it’s you. Yes it’s safe to say mom’s love was a bit smothering. Not all the time, but I am proof that no matter what we go through emotionally I will never regret putting mom first. I was with mom until the very end it definitely brought pain with peace. This healing journey I began in 2017 has really helped me thrive in our thirties. Mom will forever be our greatest teacher of life she also liked to write. Ask her for help in writing her stories I forgot so many and of course I’m missing those. There will be bad days but don’t ever leave moms side no matter how hard it gets. I highly suggest taking more breaks it is more important than you think. Especially for our mental health, please take the time for yourself! Not on anyone else, alone time with you. Not on those late night drives either. By 22 you already understand deep down how those types operate so try not to attach too many feelings. I tell you this, the love that you need will find you it will find us even when it seems like you failed. I will say this we didn’t even have to waste all that gas queen! Speak up more and keep asking for help with mom as well. I cannot exactly get into details of what’s to come but you and that bullfrog will be caring for mom in her last years of life. Very few regrets, on my bad days the list might be a little longer.  Yes I’m sorry but we have those days. Days where we feel defeated and let depressive thoughts fill our days, weeks sometimes the whole month. The amount of time I spent on certain things like depressive thoughts and certain people could have been poured back into us somehow. But knowing what I know now I’m trying to spare us a little bit of heartbreak that I’m still struggling to heal in our thirties. We try not to be reckless over here, meaning we react less. Leave people where they want to be left and really focus on what it means to love unconditionally. A losing season will come and the hurt will be unbearable you do become vulnerable a short period of time. But again, it’s all part of our story. It will not make sense right way but believe you me I can bet you a bottle of Hennessy it does. It will be okay, you stay blessed in so many ways and most importantly we overcome so much because of our faith. Stay committed to the church. I admit not making it a priority in my twenties has made me delayed with being closer to my church family. The love is always there, on time and most importantly it’s unconditional. I’ve learned the power of prayer which helps me stress less and pray about literally everything. Always be grateful for good and the bad. Our values may not be for everybody and that’s okay. I have yet to find a soul that’s as deep and genuine as ours. Caring too much will be a distraction and will consume your time in trying to save people. You can love and support people from afar, remind them you’re still rooting for them. Prayers are the best form of love you can give. Go to church queen learn the Bible just listen already! Utilize the world wide web. You can be anything you put your mind to be. Go to school focus on your career, your education that’s something I’m definitely missing that in my thirties. I will be a college graduate in our thirties I owe this to us. That degree(s) will take us places I know it will. The feeling of going back to school does not compare to previous first days of school.  Do you remember being in elementary school and those writing prompts would always make us want to cry? We thought something was wrong with us because we couldn’t tap into our creative side? If the elementary version  of us could see me know she wouldn’t believe that I was a future version of us. I enjoy writing so much now and I know you would enjoy it too. You can start by writing me a little more if you have the time. I’m not a fortune teller but I would love to make the time to respond and be as helpful as I can be. Remember we’re not changing the future. Because I truly believe we were meant to go through everything we have gone through so far. May you stay grounded and positive take that walk you have been itching to take. You know the one that park with the lake. Remember stress less and pray about everything. May you be blessed always in all ways. Hope to hear from you

    BK
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    • Beena, I am so sorry for the loss of your mother. Sounds like you were lucky to have her and she was lucky to have you. And I am so glad you found a love for writing and make the time to write. Writing is incredibly healing. You are clearly a strong and resilient woman. Keep growing. Keep healing. Keep writing and keep being you. The Unsealed family (myself included ) is here for you <3 Lauren

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    • Wow. I want you to know that you are a very strong person and that your mother is very proud of you. She’s definitely reading this letter in heaven. You were so strong and brave and your writing is such a healing. I want you to continue to inspire others with your writing. Life isn’t easy but we always have a healing process.

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    • Dear Bk,
      You have gone thru many difficult situations but you have come out strong. I am so glad that the power of prayer and your love of writing has helped you to navigate life’s challenges. Keep up your faith and positivity and you will accomplish all you set out to do. I wish you the best of luck in all your future endeavors.

      Best regards,
      Shelley

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    • Bk I LOVE how you’re immediately like “identify your toxic traits”. That is such good advice! I’m striving to be the best version of myself as well and I’m super excited to be reading about your journey. I feel like you’re speaking directly to me! I’ve struggled with depressive thoughts in the past as well (( years + of depression) and the best thing my counselor ever told me was to counsel out the negative thoughts with the positive truth. I went from saying I’m terrible at this so I’m improving on this it won’t come overnight! I hope that helps as much as it’s helped me and I hope you continue to share your story with others along your journey!

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