Infinite Lifetimes Within One
I. On Living and Loss
I have been struggling to try to figure out how to heal, and I just realized I may have
known all along. Like I’ve always done it. I’ve done it again and again and again in my
life.
If I’ve had enough experiences in my life to last someone’s lifetime, then the gift is
receiving multiple lifetimes. To try again and live differently. I suppose that in itself is a
blessing. To have seen and felt means to have lived. And I have lived—not for long, but
in depth.
Self-actualization comes through time and experience, and I’m only 31. But I’ve
survived worse, much worse. And I can do it again.
II. On Humanity and Complexity
We all exist here on Earth to teach each other lessons—either through love or pain.
Humanity can only be so perfect. We can only hope to do so much, but only so much is
within our human grasp.
Our capacity to love is great, but so are the flaws that come with being human. The
lenses we look through, the experiences that shape us—these make us who we are,
and also make the mistakes we make. To accept humanity in its purest form is to accept
imperfection.
III. On Thought, Self, and the Static of Society
I sometimes feel quite alone in these thoughts. My friends and family aren’t always at
this level of comprehension. Most of what I reflect on is philosophical: societal
development, the human being, the coexistence of good and evil, of light and dark.
We live in a time where media overload overstimulates people into distraction. It
becomes hard to see through the static. People get lost. I still get lost. But I'm still
human—still flawed. Understanding, though, is better than not knowing at all.
To be the person you want to be means removing the noise and looking inward instead
of outward. Who are you when you are alone? When emotions rise and fall? When
nothing exists but your own particles and soul, what does it mean to exist then? Who
am I, if I am not defined by outside perspectives?
The greatest question remains the shortest: Why?

IV. On Immortality and the Nature of Change
People crave immortality, seek it, have always sought it. But what is the point of living
forever? As we live, the choices we make—our downfalls, our growth—these are
already signs of rebirth, over and over.
Why seek eternity when we are already gifted with infinite lives within one?
Is it better to sit forever in the face of fear, or to embrace the unknown and understand
life and darkness for what they are? Nature is not about to change for us—it is constant.
But we are the variable. We can grow, change, pursue. We can also slip, fall, and crave.
With every darkness comes light, and with light comes darkness. We live in a cycle of
change, because as nature is constant, and change is nature, change is constant.
V. On the Soul, Reality, and the Final Question
If reality was fractured, how many of us would still be whole? How many of us would still
be able to identify the self? Could you?
You can debate that consciousness is the identity to the self—but is it not dependent on
the bricks we’ve laid to build that consciousness within ourselves as we age?
Reality may be the veil that holds the fabric of existence together, but on a different
level—immeasurable to human science—is the soul still intact if reality no longer is? If it
is, who are we at base? If not, should the soul’s energy be a measurable quantity in this
world?
If I’m still asking, who are we at base?—perhaps it is the journey and the destination to
both have the question and have it unanswered. Perhaps the debate is to debate. To
question life is to live it. To question who we are and what life is without other static is to
clearly see the question, even if we never hold the answer.
But going back to the point of humans as a flawed creature—intelligent, however
flawed—the mind wanders forward, but it also wanders backward. It may never truly be
that this question can be answered, until we stop having experiences.
And perhaps then, the answer to life is, in fact:
Death.
VI. Closing Reflection
I am not searching for answers. I am living the questions. And that is enough for now.