Never ignore a person who cares for you.
Because someday you’ll realize
You’ve lost a diamond, while you were busy collecting stones.
You see…I’ll do a lot for a man I love…
But I’ll do even more for a man I know that loves me…or so I thought.
You’ve got to build with somebody who wants it as bad as you do.
I thought he did but I was fed something until I didn’t want to be fed anymore.
I never wanted to control him.
I wanted to let him do what he wanted so I can see what he would rather do.
I let him lead.
There is something sexy about letting a man lead in the relationship, just as long as he’s not controlling it or controlling me.
His actions will show how much he respects you and how much he loves you.
Just because you’ve brought something up, it doesn’t mean you want to argue.
It means communication.
It means you want to resolve things, get some clarity, learn, and grow together.
You both are adults and should be able to communicate.
I did so much for a man and was left because he couldn’t communicate and I believe he grew bored and that it broke my self esteem.
Maybe the 6, almost 7 years was too much for him.
But he told me this:

“You care and worry about the wrong things and let them eat you up to the point you turn and lash out so how about you know something. If it wasn’t for you half of my ships wouldn’t have sailed, you saved my ass on numerous occasions. You are worth more than money can buy and know that you yourself just in care alone… your currency is priceless, you’re more than dreams can buy. Like stop letting the little things you think and feel deter you from being in a happier place. Yeah things suck and aren’t what you want but that doesn’t make it worthless.”

He lost his diamond.
Funny because I was born in April.
He knows what I am worth now after everything he’s done to me but yet I still ask myself this question…
Why didn’t he fight for me?
Why wasn’t I enough for him to stay around for?
Why has he stayed with who he’s with now but has let me go so fast?
Oh wait, I’m sorry, he repeatedly tells me he’s not with her.
Things aren’t what they seem.
He’s not happy.
He wants to get away from all of that.
I am the mother of his youngest daughter.
The woman his other children love and who I love so much like I was the one who carried them inside of me and gave them life.
His best friend of over 20 years.
We planned a forever together, chose the colors, the theme, songs, and now look.
Nothing…
All due to his infidelity and I can’t seem to shake it off that maybe it was also due to me growing half of him inside of me.
He and I weren’t ready to be parents again.
But I accepted this beautiful little blessing that came to be another girl.